This is great!

I feel like this article was written by someone who has never planned a wedding (maybe a courthouse wedding but that doesn't require much planning). I agree with a few of these 50 things, but if you didn't do ANY of them, I don't know if you could call that event a wedding. Even the simplest of civil weddings often have some of these things. Maybe it should be called "optional traditions," not "dumbest" traditions. It's not "dumb" that my fiancé wants to invite his whole giant family, it's not "dumb" that he proposed with his grandmother's ring that happens to be a diamond, it's not "dumb" that I'm getting us a cake because I know how much he loves chocolate. None of this stuff hurts anyone. 🤷🏼‍♀️

Thank you for this! We are a more modern couple and really can’t stand most of the traditional aspects of weddings. To us, it makes weddings feel boring, stuffy, predictable and not at all original. We attended many weddings as a couple, and noted that the entire event felt very much like “going through the motions” or just going down a checklist of things that “should” happen at weddings. We both knew immediately that we did not want a traditional cookie cutter wedding, but rather a celebration that reflects us as a couple and doesn’t bore our guests. Reading through the article, I was like OMG YES!! Of the 50 things listed, we are only doing 3. So much of what happens at weddings these days is just unnecessary “fluff”.

I agree with

Out of all of them, the only things we’re doing are:
1. I’m wearing white (because I want to although I disagree with the reason for white but love this new idea of people not wanting to) and a Diamond ring because I wanted one but don’t think it’s necessary.
2. Bridesmaids and groomsmen. 3. Cake for the two of us because we like cake but different desserts for guests. I don’t care about it as a guest.4. A seating chart just because we don’t want people to sit weird and then the last people to come in have to ask people to move so they can sit together. 5. A sweetheart table so we can get a minute alone and can get away from everyone else for 5 minutes 😂6. A best man speech but only because he wants to🤷🏻‍♀️
And then I guess counting that our wedding is expensive? But because we picked expensive vendors. Not because we felt pressured to spend a lot of money. But anything we’re doing I think is 100% optional and only the dress color and Diamond ring were definitely musts for me

I've never even heard of half of these, that's how updated this list is! That being said, a lot of these we also held on to, and I'm glad we did. Neither my husband nor I have any really close opposite-sex friends, and while he has three sisters, they all made it very clear they didn't want to be *in* the wedding, so I only had bridesmaids, and he only had groomsmen. However, we also didn't force any of our people to spend much time together outside of walking down the aisle. (Most of them were married, after all.) We also didn't see each other from the time our rehearsal dinner ended till the time we met at the altar, and I'm glad we did it that way. I wouldn't trade in the look on my husband's face the first time he saw me for anything in the world.

View Quoted Comment

You're right, none of this hurts anyone. I posted it because it makes those of us who are "breaking the norm" feel .... validated? No harm, no foul if people choose to follow the 'rules' completely, as it is after all a personal choice.

View Quoted Comment

Happy to share something that hit it on the mark for you! I am not doing most of the things listed as well - after all I am a "sexy senior" bride and this is the third time LOLOL I just read these message boards and feel bad for the brides getting criticized for doing their own thing.

I love this list! 95% of this list are things I definitely did not want to do. No tea, no shade. If you do the things listed that’s your thing& don’t change it bc it’s not what someone else would do, but I hate a lot of the traditional wedding stuff!