Telling friends they aren't a bridesmaid

I wouldn't worry about it too much, and if friends ask you directly if they're going to be a bridesmaid you can absolutely tell them that "we decided to keep the wedding party small". I personally always have the best time as a guest when I'm not a bridesmaid, but I am close enough to be invited to the shower and bachelorette parties! All the fun with no responsibilities, and you can wear whatever dress you want

In general with wedding planning - I always feel like the engaged couple is more awkward and stressed about potentially excluding people (whether that's from the wedding party, or from the guest list entirely) than the people in question feel! You are definitely thinking about this way more than those friends are thinking about whether or not they're in the wedding party.

@Nancy... considering that OP will need to purchase bouquets and gifts for each bridesmaid its more than just 6 hours

Just let them know the party is all family and your best friend

I agree with some of the previous responses. I did not specifically tell friends they weren't bridesmaids. I have some very good friends from high school/college and we chat every few months to keep in touch. Although I've done more "life" with them, I chose to choose the people are are present in my life/relationship now. It is still difficult and people will get hurt. Hopefully they will be understanding and make sure they know how wonderful their presence will be in your wedding.

@kate - I wouldn't say it like that. I would say, I just want to let you know I chose a really small wedding party and I know I was in your wedding party, so I wanted to make sure you understood it's nothing personal. I love you so much and value your friendship and I hope you'll come to the bachelorette or something. Just an idea of what I mean.

If they're upset, at least you can talk it through rather then have them stew about it.

There's no doubt they will find out they won't be picked and if you anticipate they'll be surprised or hurt why not nip it in the bud?

You don't need to say anything.

I have a friend who would ask about wedding planning and details and whatnot and at times, it felt like she was wanting me to ask her to be a BM, especially since she wanted to hang out so much after I got engaged, but I would just tell her my plans and nothing else. I made it sound like I wasn't picking up her hints. She eventually stopped asking about the wedding in general and also stopped asking to hang out so much

They will find out eventually and when that happens it will be awkward, but if they are your good friends they will understand. I had to tell 2 of my good friends that they weren't going to be in mine, and it was hard, they cried but then both said that they were here to support me and be by my side through it all. They are coming to the showers, bachelorrette party and all other events.

But since you have so much time I would just push the subject out for a few months; things could change!

@MrsRushinin2018: She doesn't have to give her a gift. A bridesmaid's bouquet is 30 bux. No biggie. The hurt feelings would be more than this.