Something You Wish You Knew..

So many things. I wish that I knew that there was going to be a Hurricane that would wreak havoc on my guest list. I wish that I knew that my coordinator was incompetent. I wish that I knew that people would call me on the day of my wedding to ask me about logistics. I wish that I knew that wedding cake should be frozen as soon as possible. I wish that I knew that my budget was unrealistic. I wish that I knew that my fiance/husband would not be as helpful as I wanted. I wish that I knew that my officiant would ignore his script and make up his own ceremony. I wish that I knew that a destination wedding has a very high "regret" rate. Etc. Etc. Etc.

SO many things, but if I had to pick just one, it would be that no matter what I did, no matter how hard I tried -- I couldn't please every single person with every decision, and that I would need to make peace with that.

I wish I knew that a lot of these DIY/money-saving tips you see on the Internet are not as simple as you may think. A lot of things I thought we were going to do to save money just haven't been feasible in reality (such as DIY centerpieces, for example). We are actually a bit over budget, and don't have a honeymoon budget at all right now. Oh well, I tried.

@MrsPettit don't worry about pleasing people. It's YOUR day. Not theirs. If people other than FH didn't like my decisions then too bad.

I wish I had known that a few of my co-workers, even after being asked multiple times to tell me by a particular date of they were coming, would just not show up. I would have invited other people that would have come. I also wish that I didn't let other people get in my head about my maid of honor. She showed up and everything was fine

That things can get chaotic towards the end, really. Definitely think about what you want on the day, and your DIY priorities if you have any (especially if they're projects that will happen in the days leading up to your wedding).

I agree with the people pleasing. I've planned a pretty traditional event IMO, however, FH is PR, and his family has their own ideas of how a wedding/family event should be conducted! If I knew then, what I know now, I'd have had his immediate family (sisters, mom/dad), and my immediate family only. Then just gone out for a nice dinner afterwards. I'd have saved a ton of $ and a lot of unnecessary headache.

I wish I knew that buying linens may have a cheaper price tag than rentals, but with the time spent ironing and transporting them, they are not necessarily "cheaper".

I wish I had known to have a back-up of every reading you'll be doing at your wedding...even if you're REALLY sure the person that is supposed to read it will have it...they might not.

Also I wish I knew how you can hurt people without meaning it. My uncle broke into our first dance in costume (which I expected, it's sort of family tradition) and i thought it was great! I didn't realize how short I'd danced with him because it was such a high pressure situation, but he thought I was mad and beat himself up about it for weeks! I still feel awful he thought I didn't like it...

Don't rely on anyone for help; whatever you plan make sure it's something you can handle on your own.

As much as I love my mother, unfortunately she was not there for me and my husband during our planning the way I thought she would be and she definitely let me down on A LOT of things during the process of planning.

I wish someone would have emphasized choosing your bridal party wisely more. We didn't expect our bridal party to do much other than be by our sides the day of, however afterward my husband and I realized that we should have really only asked three out of the six people to be in our wedding party (four out of the six were our siblings!). My sister who is also my best friend was my Matron of Honor, but end of day regardless of how much I love her, unfortunately she was more of a nightmare and caused stress that I feel wouldn't have existed if she had just been a guest. Same goes for two of husbands siblings; while they didn't cause stress, his 18 year old brother didn't stay for the reception and didn't pay attention to what was going on and his sister was very absent from everything. Also, we would have been completely fine with having uneven sides in the wedding party.

I wish I knew that all the small stuff was going to add up and I was going to spend more money than I thought I would ... Because then I would not have spent money on silly things at the beginning like personalized M&Ms. Stick to the plan and add things at the end if you can afford it.

I totally agree about the table linens! I got mine for 6 bucks and so happy to have saved hundreds of dollars. Week of, I try to iron them and bc I rarely iron I didn't know what I was doing and ruined the stain on my beautiful dining room table. I didn't want to mess with it so I had them steamed at the cleaners. It ended up costing me as much as of I'd just rented them in the first place and been less hassle.

I wish I'd known how much I would want video of our ceremony. I still don't think we needed a videographer, but I forgot to ask anyone to film and am very sad about that.

I wish I'd known that professionals don't always act professional and do what they've been paid to do. Not sure how I could've changed anything with that knowledge, but still, I was surprised by some of the things I dealt with from people who were supposed to be pros and wanted my business.

I wish we'd taken the chance to invite more people. We had 20 last minute cancellations/no shows. I also wish I'd known that people were not going to drink the way we thought. We had so, SO much alcohol left over and I think if people had drank more, more would've stayed longer.

I also wish I'd known how easy it is to blow the budget to hell and back and how much money your end up spending in the last few weeks. At that point you're stressed and out of time, so you just start throwing money at whatever comes up or isn't done yet and it adds up so fast and is way more than you think it'll be.

I wish I knew that a handful of people would have their phones/camcorders out to record our entire ceremony and personal written vows so I should've made it an unplugged ceremony.. I wish I knew that the cake baker was incompetent and apperantly color blind, so I could've taken my idea elsewhere. I wish I would've known that my great grandma was not in the group shots so that I could've made sure to grab her. I wish I would've known how incredible the day turned out despite the small things so that I wouldn't have stressed so much beforehand.

So far, I wish I knew that my dress would come in so quickly and that I could have waited MONTHS to buy it but instead I will have a dress that is too big due to weight loss and it will need some big alterations..

These are all nice tips and a nice thing to get off all you ladies' chests! I am so sorry for you all that had something bad happen at your wedding but at least you got through it and the day was still yours!

I wish I had known that I would have increased my budget from $12K to $28K. I would have spent more on some things and a lot less on others. I'm not sorry about a moment of it though and in retrospect, I truly wouldn't change a thing.

Prior to engagement: you can save for the wedding you want before getting engaged just don't tell others. I didn't bc I didn't want to "jump the gun"

During planning: its not as fun as ppl/movies make it seem. The first exciting thing you do and you realize no one else is excited or even care. And that until the initial engagment annoucement & dress no one cares until a couple months before the wedding.

If it weren't for my BM dresses, & WW wedding planning would be boring/depressing. Spending you free money on paying for ppl who dont care

I couldn't agree with FFW any more about planning and spending out money on high quality food and free booze for most people who don't care. With that said, there are others who do care, and that is what makes it all worth it.

I wish I knew that staying with the bridal shops seamstress would be the smarter choice than going elsewhere. My bustle was an embarrassing mess because I tried to shave off some money at the end and go with my usual seamstress. The bridal shop told me they have experience in wedding gowns, that is all that they do. I wish I stayed with them instead of trying to save a few bucks, it wasn't worth it!

I wish I knew that I would lose a couple of life-long friends to severe jealousy over our happiness and moment in time (our wedding day). Again, with that said, no amount of jealousy could take away the joy and elation I felt on my wedding day marrying my husband. But I still wish I were prepared for it because I am heartbroken over it today.

I wish someone had told me a few etiquette facts I found out along the way. I didn't know when to send invites, that I had to give presents to the bridal party, etc. Lucky for me I found WW and it saved me from making tons of mistakes! But I definitely should have started lurking the forums even before we booked our venue!

I wish I wouldn't have jumper the gun on our venue. I feel like we went with the first place we saw in our budget and we could have done it closer to home and maybe even cheaper. but now we are $500 deposit in the hole and don't want to lose that..