Solo trip before wedding?

I think the timing would be weird, given that the last week is usually used for last minute things, but it’s for work. I’d love to go on an overseas work trip!

What if it’s not a mandatory work thing, more like a workshop, cultural exposure type thing. Does that change anything with you. Also when you say the timing is weird, what specific concerns with the timing? Thanks for the reply!

I think it would be okay if everything is taken care of prior to the trip. If it is the bride it may effect alterations.

I know the week before my wedding is going to be hectic for me because we are having two ceremonies and I am doing a lot of DIY. I doubt it will be as hectic for my fiancé as he doesn’t have to do as much as I do for the wedding.

I think it is fine! Just make sure everything is done before and it should be just fine, especially if one person is still home for any last minute things that come up.

Gaining world experience is always a great thing!

My only concern would be that typically final vendor meetings/payments and alterations (if you're the bride) usually fall within that window. As long as the person staying behind doesn’t mind tackling all that solo, I don’t see an issue.

If everything is sorted out ahead of time, I think this is fine. If there are still a lot of last minute details and one partner is being left to deal with everything, I think that’s an issue. But as long as both partners are in agreement , is really what’s important. Better if the one that is out of town is not completely out of touch, like still accessible by phone/text in case any questions need answering. For us, most of the last weeks were me working on decor, and I didn’t really need anything from my husband. Except a couple of questions here and there—verifying some stuff with the DJ, sorting out the seating chart. It wouldn’t have been okay for me to leave those things unanswered but as long as we could’ve sorted gem out over the phone, it would’ve been fine. As it was, I was away the weekend before for my bachelorette, and I think his may have been the weekend before mine— we didn’t have a whole lot of together time in the lead up. But we were in good shape and all sorted with our caterer and had already had all of our ‘last minute’ meetings.

That’s so interesting that no ones has any concerns about travel hiccups leading to the person missing the wedding entirely. Yes, worst case scenario but I’m thinking about possible missed flights, cancelled flights due to hurricane, lost passport etc. I guess I don’t have as much faith that everything will work out perfectly and that my FH would arrive as planned 1-2 days before the rehearsal.

So, to me, this is perfectly normal. My FH travels for work at least 2 times a month if not more. (Usually gone Tuesday-Thursday). I've asked him to try to not travel the week before the wedding, but it really depends on the company's clients and he doesn't have a ton of control over it. If this is a thing that has to happen, you just adjust and deal with it.

I've heard of people taking off most of the week before the wedding, but that simply isn't a possibility for anyone I know, but if you are organized there doesn't need to be last minute details to take care of.

It does not have to happen at all and the trip is to an under developed country.

Just trying to gauge whether I’m being completely unreasonable about a trip to El Salvador that isn’t mandatory in which my FH returns on the 23rd or 24th when the rehearsal is on the 25th and wedding on the 26th. Yes, if it were mandatory I would deal with it. Thanks for the input.

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My FH is a pilot so his whole job is travelling, you just need to have a little faith. Yes things sometimes do happen and it would certainly be sucky but do you live your whole life in fear of things maybe going wrong?

You could also get into a car accident day of the wedding and miss your wedding. I think it's unreasonable to not let someone go on a work related trip because something might happen.

That’s so interesting. I guess that’s why we are individuals. I see it completely differently. And nope, my aversion to risk surrounding our big day does not mean that it general im risk averse.

Anyway, as with most internet conversations this one has taken an unhelpful tone.

I think you came here hoping for a specific answer, and just because you didnt get that answer doesn't necessarily mean it was an "unhelpful tone". People answered your question.

Nope, not at all. I like to hear other points of view that is presented respectfully and without judgments. Asking a loaded question (loaded with assumption) whether I live my life being too afraid of everything etc is neither helpful nor is it necessary.

Most internet conversations usually have a tone of unfriendliness, condescension etc etc. I could go on and on but you probably would not agree and that’s totally fine. I was going to wrap up the conversation but I’d actually welcome a debate.

I think this is really just dependent on people’s circumstances. My ex-husband was military so he had to be prepared to leave pretty much always. The two-ish months before we got married he was gone for 7 out of 9 weeks for different trainings.

My current FH travels a decent amount for work because he works for a large company that only does training in 3 of their locations so anytime he gets promoted or is learning a new skill for his current role, he’s gone for 2 weeks at a time.

I think the problem with being worried about the “what if something goes wrong” situation is that something is just as likely to go wrong locally as it is with your FH traveling.

I hear you. That is certainly true that something can go wrong anywhere in the world. I suppose if something went wrong and he didn’t make it back to the wedding on time I’d feel like the scanario could have been avoided especially since it’s and extracurricular activity and not something mandatory. If something catastrophic happened at home that caused him to miss the wedding I’d feel it was unavoidable. Anyway, it is something we will both give a lot of thought. Thanks for your input!

View Quoted Comment Because you didn't respond directly to that comment, I took your statement of the conversation taking an unhelpful tone, as a response to all of the previous comments, not just that one. Although, I don't think that poster was saying that you do live that way, more that she's recommending not living that way, I can understand that response to that specific statement more than compared to all of them.

View Quoted Comment That’s just one example of statements and sentiments that are unnecessary and unhelpful. There were several. One more example, “You just need to have a little faith.” Social interaction on the internet is interesting.