Small wedding question re: after ceremony

Are you hosting the dinner at the restaurant?

Can you elaborate on how you see this working? Are you making reservations at a restaurant but just not in a dedicated room? Are you hoping to just show up somewhere with 30 people and be seated? I am confused.

I feel like majority, if not all, of the 30 will want to go to the restaurant. I would definitely coordinate that with a place. Also what minimums are you getting that 20-30 people wouldn't hit?

We're still a bit confused on what to do too. It'll be a lunch because we're getting married early in the day. We would ask guests prior via invite and/or word of mouth if they plan to come afterwards. I guess I want it to be treated as a large party by the restaurant instead of a private function if that makes sense? This is a very casual wedding - it's going to be immediate family and a few close friends. We are inviting 30 but don't anticipate all 30 attending because of time and location (middle of the week, afternoon, about 1.5 hrs from home).

SF girl here. It's going be hard to find a good restaurant that fit 30 people without reservations!

Have you considered getting out of the city? Like Daly City or San Mateo?

Even then, you might have trouble. I hunted for restaurants for my RD but anything over 15 guests will need pre-fix menu and advance reservation.

Maybe you best bet is rent a small venue and hire a caterer.

Most will want to come, and you should host it. And no, you can't just show up at a restaurant with 30 guests and expect to be seated.

Thirty guests is not an elopement. thirty guests, invited 17 months in advance is a small wedding.

So I assume you are hosting/paying for the lunch at the restaurant? Most restaurants cannot accommodate for that many guests without a reservation. Eta: Most will likely attend the lunch, so you should plan for everyone coming.

The problem is if you don't reserve a place, they will likely not be able to accommodate a large group of people. Even 10 people is a lot to just show up and need a table. If you are planning on making a reservation for the number of people, that might work. I don't know if you will be saving any money by doing it that way though. There might still be food and beverage minimums for a large group.

ETA: My wedding is slightly less than 30 people and I am hosting a lunch after. The minimum I have to reach is $1,500 which is easy with that many people.

Call the restaurant and make a reservation for 30, so they're aware of how many and when you will be coming. DO NOT plan for your arrival to coincide with a lunch rush time.

Just put on the invitation that a lunch reception will be at x restaurant, and the address. Easy enough. Just because it is at a restaurant doesn't mean it's a reception. The reception is your thank you to your guests. You are paying for the lunch, right?

O&L thank you for the input! We literally just decided on the ceremony location yesterday so it's all still in the preemptive stage....way preemptive as we aren't marrying til April 2018. Do you have any recommendations since you're an SF native?

Just saw your other post.

Invite everyone with an invite and an RSVP.

I'd call a few restaurants in the area and pitch your need. I don't know that they would want to book you this far ahead, but at least you'll have a grip on what's possible.

We do this kind of thing all the time, and I've assembled a long list of places that love our groups like this! But you can't just spring it on them.

MNA yes we are planning to pay. We just want it to be low key is the biggest part. We don't want or need the whole reception vibe. And we would have it around 2pm because we want to avoid lunch rush.

Celia thank you. Yeah I'm just thinking ahead really at this point. I would definitely call the restaurant chosen in advance with the count. Would never just show up and have them be cool with it!

Absinthe and Zuni Café are options. Both very busy at all times, but close to City Hall. You will absolutely need reservations.

What kind of food are you thinking?

Esperpento in the mission has a private room. Just not sure how much it will cost.

I was at a small wedding at Fort Mason catered by Bi-Rite. It was a beautiful location overlooking gold gate bridge.

Everything is expensive in the city sadly

I can't make specific recommendations, but I do agree with Celia about sending out invites with RSVPs. If you choose to not go this route, plan on (and budget on) all 30 guests going out to eat with you after the ceremony. Once you do pick a place that is within your budget/taste, call them to see how early in advance you can make reservations. As a former restaurant worker, please do no just show up with 32 people.

We're having an intimate wedding as well with 30 guests. We'll be celebrating with our guests at an exquisite restaurant near the ceremony venue. But we'll be having the entire space to ourselves because we wanted to continue the intimate vibe. We'll be having a 4 course dinner with an open bar + dessert. We're going to have the traditional speeches, cake cutting, table cards and favors. I'm not quite sure it's ideal to just show up at a restaurant with that many people though.

My guest list is 17, accounting for dates that people may not bring, and not including us. So a possibility of -3. And 2 out of town guests that I am hoping will come. So you can see our numbers could go lower. And we could end up with a pretty private, intimate affair. Some say small wedding, but no one knows we're getting married except my kids, and the close friends that are invited... to everyone else it will be a surprise. So some would consider it an elopement. In any event, it's not a courthouse, but a small outdoor Chapel in the Texas Hill Country. And afterward we are going to a restaurant. Mine is just around the corner, but probably about August I started asking around, speaking to managers, etc... we met with the one we ultimately decided on earlier this month. She took us around, looked at spaces, etc.. discussed cake tables, and how we'd want to set up. Unfortunately, mine is on a Sunday, and we'll end right about dinner time, so they'll be busy. But she is willing to accommodate us and keep that section ready for us. I will touch base with her next month, when I order the cake. And then get her my final numbers at the beginning of December.

What you are planning is bigger, and sounds like the area is busier... but you've got time. It gives you a little idea though what went into setting it up. Best of luck to you!!

ETA: On our invitations it's just listed with Ceremony on side and the address, and Reception on the other side with the other address. It's a small enough affair that those that know understand what's going on.

I don't have any good advice but just wanted to say the SF city hall is beautiful! I saw some wedding pics from someone there recently and it looked so nice!

The restaurant may even allow you to limit the menu to 3-4 options.