Small ceremony, big reception

The small ceremony is not small enough for this to be ok IMO.. It will look rude to the other 90 guests. Potentially look gift grabby.

I have to be honest one of my best friends did this and we were all really put off that we were not invited to the ceremony.

Invite everyone to both.

What's the price difference? Is it the cost of the chairs?

If you want to invite very few, you should leave out the aunts and uncles and just have parents, siblings and grandparents. Once you open the aunt and uncle gate, all bets are off.

The ceremony is usually the cheapest part - guest wise. How much could the seating possibly be?

See at first we were going to do a "destination wedding" to the mountains with just 16 people...but with FMIL and Hf want to add the aunts and uncles... then it grew. The whole wedding in the beginning was suppose to stay under like 50 people but that didn't stay the plan...

One of my fiancé's friends didn't invite us to the ceremony (just the reception) and he's still mad about it to this day. We even make jokes that we're only inviting THEM to the reception and not the ceremony. Please invite everyone to the ceremony to spare feelings and grudges. It just doesn't sound like a good idea.

Who is paying? At the end of the day this is YOUR wedding. Do what you and your FH want.

Ok but that didn't answer our questions.

I think if it is just the cost of chairs, you should invite everyone.

Are they helping to pay for the wedding? Invite who YOU want to be there. And if they are helping to pay, and you don't want to invite the Aunts and Uncles, then give the money back and tell them thanks, but no thanks.

Everyone should be invited to both..just shy of 30 people isn’t small enough for a tiered reception to be ok. Our total guest list is 35..

Reception is the most expensive part, so you’re not really saving much by not having all at the ceremony...

Chairs to rent are like $1.50-$3 each, depends. I'm out in the country and everywhere I know or have looked into that rent want to charge more for the shipping out here... Im about an 1 hour away from the nearest renters... So I am figuring out different DIY seatings... I loved the square hay bales and could get them for free but FMIL doesn't like them. I really wanted a intimate wedding ceremony and if I could I would just do mamas and daddys but that's opening a whole other can of worms. my parents and his have talk about budgets to us but they haven't given us definite answers on what everyone wants to participate in with.

1. Hay bales are terrible sorry. I'd be pissed.

2. Have your intimate wedding. Its YOUR wedding.

3. Do not count any money towards your budget until it is in your hand.

Don't rely on your parents to pay for our wedding. If they pitch in, great, but it is not their responsible to foot the bills.

No to the hay bales (do a search on here).

Don't anticipate funding from your parents.

You have eight months to save the $200 or so for chairs. Diy'ing is not going to save you money, it will only cost you time.

I am super allergic to hay so that is the worst idea ever to make people sit on hay bales.

Invite everyone on the larger guest list to both, or just cut the guest list to those who you actually want there - and only invite that small group to both.

Either have a ceremony & reception with 29 people

or

a ceremony & reception with 120 people

or

cut the 120 people to a smaller number that can attend both the ceremony & reception.

See a pattern here?

No hay bales. Anyone who suggests them has never sat on one. It's gross.

You can do a private wedding if it's JUST your parents and siblings; not 29 guests. We do a lot of these, but they are almost always under 10 IMMEDIATE family members.

IMHO, you don't plan a ceremony guest list based what chairs cost. You plan it based on whether or not you want those people to be part of your ceremony.

If you were going to do a small wedding, I agree with others: parents, siblings and grandparents only. No aunts, uncles. That will cut the number down and you can say it's immediate family only. That is what we are doing, 18 people (including our 6 nieces and nephews) I am so looking forward to just my close fam being there!