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Savvy March 2018

Sisters in law as bridesmaids?

Kimberly, on January 4, 2017 at 7:44 PM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 7

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My FH and I would like a very small (definitely under 50, maybe 25 people) wedding. Part of that would involve limiting our bridal party. I would like to have only two bridesmaids, which would be my sister and my best friend. However, FH has 4 sisters - his family is very traditional and I am sure that the sisters are expecting to be bridesmaids. Due to the very small wedding, I don't want 6 bridesmaids, especially since more than likely I would be the one paying for their attire and we are trying to keep costs down. Am I a terrible person? How do I approach that?

***i mention me more than likely covering their attire costs as I am planning on paying for my little sisters and best friends, since they will both be paying to fly themselves in from out of state and hotel rooms, the least I could do is cover the dress, but it means the sister in laws would expect it as well.

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7 Comments

Latest activity by Fatal_Rei, on January 5, 2017 at 3:33 PM

Just Said Yes September 2017
Desirea · on January 4, 2017 at 7:53 PM
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No you are definitely not a horrible person. My fiance and I chose to have a small wedding and we have 85 people invited 40 people on his side for the people on my side I chose not to go with my sister-in-law's as bridesmaids because one I didn't want a big wedding party too yes I'm close to them but I felt if I asked one of them to be a bridesmaid I had to ask them all. So I chose my sister and two best friends. Just tell them how you feel and the predicament that you're wanting for the wedding and everything will be ok
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Master April 2017
Bee · on January 4, 2017 at 7:57 PM
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No, you're not being rude. Definitely keep it to just the 2 girls. I will never understand adding people to the BP for a reason other than they are your closest people. If they ask, tell them exactly what you told us. You guys are having a smaller wedding.
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Master March 2017
Linds · on January 4, 2017 at 7:57 PM
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We have a large wedding, but opted for a small wedding party. FH will have his brother, and I will have my sister - our BIL/SIL will be walking out with their spouses (BM/MOH) but not be in the bridal party.
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Master April 2017
MrsSki · on January 4, 2017 at 7:58 PM
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Not a horrible person. My sisters opted not to be in my wedding party, but I'm ordering corsages for them so they still have something special
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Expert July 2017
Kayla V · on January 4, 2017 at 7:59 PM
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You're not being rude at all. I'm having all 3 of my sisters and my SIL in mine, but wouldn't expect FH to put my 4 brothers as groomsmen. No one in my family is bothered by it at all.
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Master August 2017
Nicole2017 · on January 4, 2017 at 8:06 PM
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You're not a terrible person! I'm having a 200 person wedding and 8 bridesmaids, and none of my FHs 3 sisters are in the wedding. I have a really amazing group of friends and couldn't imagine not asking all of them to stand with me, and adding 3 more to the bridal party would have been wayyyy too many people.
Everyone is totally cool with it. And if they weren't I'd hope they'd respect my choices in this instance.
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Savvy April 2017
Fatal_Rei · on January 5, 2017 at 3:33 PM
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Your bridesmaids should be people you are close to and not just standing there out of obligation. If you only want 2 bridesmaids then that's all there should be.

If you want to avoid stepping on anyone's toes, then perhaps you should let people know now. If you are uncomfortable with it, have your FH tell his side of the family your ( as in yours AND his ) plans are to have X amount of people in your wedding and that you both would like them to respect that wish.
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