Sister as a Maid of Honor?

You should only ask the person you want to be by your side! I have two sisters and asked neither of them to be my MOH. My choice was my cousin who I am closer with and definitely more deserving of the title.

There's really no age limit on being a maid of honor so I wouldn't worry about that. If you are close to your sister and can't think of anyone else that you would want to be your maid of honor then I would go with it! Now if you and sister are not that close and you have a very close best friend, that decision is really up to you. You have to be up there with whomever you're most comfortable with. I have two sisters that I am not close with in my wedding party but asked my best friend of 11 years to be my Maid of Honor. Good luck on making your decision!

View Quoted Comment If feel as if im not the demanding character, I know it will be her and if things don't go her way, I know she will stress me out. (Ex: bridesmaids not in agreement with her)

My little sister is my MOH but she is my best friend and I couldn't imagine anyone else being my MOH. She is four years younger then me so some things are a little more challenging for her to do but she's been doing a great job! My advice for you is to choose someone who YOU want to be your MOH. Don't feel obligated to have your sister as your MOH just because she is your sister. Do what makes you happy!

View Quoted Comment Angelena: the qualifications are not based on who can serve me. That is definitely not what im looking for. I just don't believe she will get along with the rest of the bridesmaids. My sister is has a strong personality not compatible with many. Ahhh... I dont want drama

My aunt told me the same thing. My sister lives 6hours away from me. My BFF (or my actual MOH) lives 40mins away. My sister is one of those jealous types. Basically she can’t be happy for anyone but herself and she is super critical (I could only imagine how dress shopping would go). I was talking wedding plans with my aunt and I told her I was having one bridesmaid and it would be my friend. She replied “Oh no. You can’t do that. You have to have your sister as your MOH. You can’t do that.” Ugh! It pissed me off so much! Even if I wanted my sis as MOH she couldn’t because of how far away she lives and I’m not going to have my BFF do all of the work and give my sister the credit of MOH or even a bridesmaid for that matter. Idk. The way I see it is the person who stands behind me is the person who helped me plan the event.

View Quoted Comment So if you don’t make her MOH she will be a bridesmaid then? She’ll still cause problems being salty. It’s really up to you but you can pick people who you think will be compatible all you want, it might not work out that way! I never thought my best friends would cause so many issues but two of them did by just being annoying about money, what we did at the bachelorette, shoes, etc etc. Just very demanding or whining. I love them as friends but Jesus lord as bridesmaids they just couldn’t be normal. I’m a pretty chill person so it was really frustrating. I think in general you have some stuff to think about whether you want your sister or not! Mull it over for sure.

Hi,

I hate when family tries to tell you who you HAVE to have... it makes it so awkward!! are you guys not very close? also what are the qualifications. Although many people here go back and fourth about serving to the bride and its not the moh job etc etc.... I do think that having a moh who is not very excited for you or involved in planning like a bachelorette than that really does bring a girl down... you want your moh to be your closest nearest dearest and that person usually wants to make sure everything is perfect for you

MOH isn't a job first of all. It's an honor hence Maid of Honor. Why is there an age limit to you on this? That's kinda odd.

Your MOH should be your nearest and dearest as an honor to them. If she isn't that then don't pick her. There's no rule saying you are my sister so you are automatically MOH.

View Quoted Comment

To me, that's a red flag not to make her your maid of honor. She should rally the troops together and help your day be stress free.

Why is there an age limit on MOH?

If you're close with your sister, then have her as your MOH. Don't have her as your MOH just because you're related.

I'm having my matron of honor my best friend. She just got married, so when she did, she became my matron, and then I asked her if she was cool if I made my sister Maid of honor, and she was fine with it. I'm 8 years older than my sister, and I'm SUPER close to her. She's my favorite sibling. I am not having her as my maid of honor just because she's my sister, though, but because she's one of my best friends. I have another sister who isn't in my wedding at all, too, just because I'm not close to her at all.

I really don't recommend that you have your sister as MOH just because she's your sister. Especially if you don't think she's qualified for MOH Duties. If she's not reliable or if she has a hard time with responsibility or isn't easily reached, I would choose someone else.

All of your responses have been insightful. Thank you so much. Even though it is not a good thing I am glad to know I am not the only one with a family that automatically assigns roles.

As far as my sister, I know she would want the best for me. But I can already picture her getting upset, mad or even defensive if a bridesmaid hesitates to contribute to anything.

And truthfully the reason why I mentioned the age gap between us is not necessarily because I think there should be a cap on the age of a MOH, its because the rest of the bridesmaids will be around my age and perhaps with my sister being the oldest during activities and in the position of MOH, it might encourage her to act a certain way.
Who knew one small aspect of a wedding can cause a whole discussion.
Thank you ladies

Age shouldn’t matter. It should be who your closest too. I had my gay bff the first time and my sister -12 years older - as patron and matron of honor. Both have declined for my second wedding so one niece that is 12 years younger than me.