siblings in law in the wedding party

I think it's a nice gesture to invite F-IL's to be a part of the BP. I asked my FH's cousin, who is like a sister to him. At this point though, I do think it's too late.

If you have her do a reading, you can frame it that you wanted her role to be special and different than a BM.

Just curious though, why wouldn't you want her at your Bach Party?

Fsil didn't ask me to be in her wedding and the only other so who wasn't asked to be in the wedding was my other fsil's bf who absolutely everyone in the family hated... And yeah it sucked and I was hurt

Fast forward to my wedding and I will be including this fsil in my BP even though we aren't really close because I don't want her to be the only one not included.

You probably should have included her but it's too late now. However asking her to do the reading was a kind gesture

You didn't do anything to wrong by not including her, your BP should be your nearest and dearest. I chose not to include H's sisters, because we aren't close and they're 10 years older than me. It can be a nice gesture to do so, but it's not required at all.

I did however make sure they were on the invite list for the shower, bachelorette party, etc.

Thank you everyone, again, for any and of your input!

@Katelina1 it's not that I don't/wouldn't WANT her at the Bachelorette party, it's just a full weekend about an hour away, and they rented a vacation property, booked a spa day for the girls going, etc. But I will still ask if she wants to come, the BM who planned it could probably still make changes. Guessing FSIL won't want to join though :/

My fsil will not be in the wedding or invited to the wedding. Don't feel bad

Neither of my SILs (future and present) are in the party. It wasn't a blip on my radar to ask them. We are not that close.

I find it wrong, since she was only one not asked.

@jess I feel like there is a story behind that?

Op FSIL probably won't want to join because you've already taken steps to exclude her regardless of intent

If my brother got married and I wasn't a bridesmaid I'd be pissed in some families it's expected especially if she's the only one not in it. I do not care for my FSIL but she's in it because I'm going to be the bigger person and put my/FH personal feelings aside to make sure everyone is happy and feels included in our families for our wedding

So rude, if other family members are in the bridal party, she should be...then again it all depends my FSILs won't even be invited to our wedding due to some bad blood with my FH

With her being the only sibling being left out i could see how her feelings could get hurt, i know that for my brothers wedding i was quite a bit hurt that i was not asked at all because her brothers were his groomsmen, and with me being his only sister because we had lost our older sister 12 yrs before that.

Even if it did hurt her feelings though I'm not sure that she would tell you, although if you have 4 BM's and he only had 3 groomsmen why couldnt he have asked her to be a grooms women?

Ugh, your MIL sounds like mine... expressing her own thoughts and feelings but passing them off as someone else's. Keep your original plans.

She can be a groomswoman.

Neither of my sil's are standing with me and neither of my brothers are with fh. He asked his 2 brothers and best friend. I asked my sister, my best friend, and ironically FH's best friends wife. No hard feelings from anyone that I know of.

Even though she is not standing up can you ask that she be included in the pre wedding stuff like the bachelorette party and even invite her to get ready with you the morning of

I agree about the groomswoman! I really wish my FH would have asked her, to be honest, even if he didn't want to, then just to keep my FMIL from making passive comments to him.

It wasn't a decision I made to exclude her, I actually asked my bridesmaids and had their dresses ordered months before my FH even decided on his groomsmen... he was so torn about including some of his friends or none, and I didn't want to wait any longer for my BMs sake in planning. So when I chose mine, I had no idea FH would decide on his brothers and my sister's husband.

Yes, absolutely @Jessica M. ! I made hair and makeup appointments for her with mine

No, I'm not having FH's sister in my bridal party nor his brother's Fiance and his brother is best man.

I'm having all three of my FSIL in my bridal party. We aren't super close now, but I know I'll never regret having them by my side. I wouldn't want any of them to feel like I didn't see them as part of Our Family (since it'll no longer be "mine" and "his"!)

Is it possible your FMIL is feeling left out, and thus assumes her daughter is? I have no idea of course,nor any idea how you'd help her out if she is-- it just occurred to me.