Shower invite limit... how do I tell friends they aren't invited?!

Listen to @jessie

I'm sorry that you felt you had to get defensive but your original post came off as extremely ungrateful. The additional information was helpful.

Edit: Just be glad everyone was distracted by Rameka or I guarantee the responses would have been a lot worse. The responses became a lot more positive after you elaborated on the situation.

Thanks ladies, I like those ideas. And I agree that she should never tell me the price and that I never should've even known about it! But I can't help that she told me about it in anger LOL! My sister and I are very different people. She lives in a very high society type of world and I'm just not that. So although I should've expected that she would have a wonderfully lavish shower I also should have told her that that is not what I'm expecting or needing. Clearly I should not have told people about the shower date...duh! But now that I did, I have to fix it.and I except that responsibility. I just want to do it in the most tactful way possible. Contrary to some people's beliefs on this post, I'm not a spoiled whiny brat ala Veruca Salt... Thank you to the ladies who *actually* offered solutions and not nasty comments (I mean, it must be awesome to be so perfect that you've never had a faux pas!) I will definitely use the tips and wording supplied. Who knows, they may not even care :-)

@ Futuremrs- thank you for taking the advice so well! Hopefully it all works out

Honestly, if I didn't get invited to my friend's bridal shower, I would not be upset. I hate them, but that's just me.

Basically, when someone offers to throw you a shower how it usually works is they tell you how many people they can comfortably host and then you give them a list with that many names (all of which should also be invited to the wedding of course). Really, it was very dangerous to verbally invite anyone before the actual invitations went out. That's true for any event outside of perhaps really casual home type parties where things are far more flexible. At this point IMO, if I were in this situation I would try to talk to the person hosting and explain that to me the more important thing would be to have the few extra people than the fancy catering etc and see if there is a way to make it more affordable. Really 2k is a TON for a shower and I would honestly feel really bad if someone spent that much on my shower unless perhaps they were just very wealthy and insisted but I would still feel a little guilty. You don't need to serve a full meal at a shower. Most don't in fact. It's most common to have finger foods and dessert etc. Perhaps if you toned it down a bit you could have a few more people and actually make it less expensive. Though, I will say that having that many people in a home, unless it is very large, could be a problem in and of itself. Bottom line is that your sister is hosting and that is she doesn't want that many people coming you really can't change that. The most I would do is as I said mention that you could perhaps tone other things down to compensate. But if she doesn't go for that there's nothing more you can really do. Then you would just need to explain to the other people that you cannot extend an invitation.

Honestly, I would cut random cousins and family I don't see before I would ever cut my friends from something like that!

The way the post was worded sounded ungrateful, I wasn't trying to make you feel bad just give you another perspective. I wish the best for your shower and wedding.

I agree with November. The original wording didn't shine you in the best light. With this being the internet, word choice is crucial! A lot of people write up their longer posts (with all the details) in word and copy and paste in chunks so that we get the whole picture.

All you have to do is jump over a few posts to see that there really are some "interesting" people here that like to troll or think everything is all about them.

I tried to give you serious advice with a cute meme to let you know that your post was worded poorly.

I hope everything works out for you!