Should i invite an ex friend to my wedding?

Doesn't sound like you're friends anymore so unless you're trying to repair the friendship (which I would do before the wedding if you're gonna invite her), I wouldn't invite her.

Doesn't sound like you are friends with her anymore. If you want to invite her, I think you should try the mend the friendship before the wedding rather than just inviting her now with the way things ended.

Simply put, no. Don’t invite her.

Nope, don't invite her.

She's not a friend anymore so skip the invite. You could try to mend the relationship in the next few months and then reassess closer to the time, but unless you've made huge progress I wouldn't be inviting her

It kinda sounds silly to me. Personally, if I was in your shoes, I would call and try to talk it out. If the friendship can be fixed then send an invite, if it can't be fixed, don't send one.

I wouldn't invite her. If she was a good friend, she shouldn't have gotten mad at you for not going to her birthday.

"I don’t want her to feel left out, and I don’t want our group to wonder where she is the entire time."

Honestly, none of that is your problem. Your title says it all- "ex friend". I wouldn't invite her.

Nope I wouldn't invite her. I had an ex friend message me and say she was sad she didn't get a save the date but we haven't talked in 2 years. So no, plus if you invite her she's likely to be a distraction to you on the day of

I had a similar friend after grad school who was aghast that I didn’t pay for her dinner. Rvsuse I had a job. Yeah, no thanks. If you don’t consider her a friend, don’t invite her.

Do you feel you need her in your wedding?
i guess you were doing fine with her not being your friend. I wouldn’t invite neither try to reconcile, she’s an ex-friend, people come and go of our life all the time. Too stressful planning to add this to your list I’d think.

I would assume your friend group already realizes that you two aren't friends anymore? So, no need to force the issue or worry about how everyone else will read into it. No invite for her.

View Quoted Comment That’s true, it is causing more stress than needed right now.

Thank you everyone for your responses. It always helps to get someone else’s perspective! I will not be inviting her. As one commenter said, people come and go. It will most likely be more stressful having her there.

I don’t understand at all why you’d feel obligated to invite someone you have no interest in being friends with. I’m glad you’re choosing not to have her there because it would probably stir up more drama just inviting her.

I have a similar situation but mines was more serious Long story short she stopped talking to me and we’re both getting married this year the same thought crossed my mind should I invite her but looking at our circumstances I believe she was a Ex friend for a reason so I did not bother to include her on my guest list.

I had one or two falling outs with a friend of mine. I’m a people pleaser and it’s hard for me to tell people no and she is just dramatic. She introduced me to H so I felt a strange obligation to stay friends with her (he is not a fan of her at all). I don’t like to create drama so I didn’t really talk about it, just included her on the invite list. I was moving so I didn’t really care. My MOH ended up inviting her to all the pre-wedding events because she knew some of the girls coming. She ended up throwing a temper tantrum at my engagement party, invited two guys to the bar for my bachelorette and then back to my hotel room, and on the night of the wedding going to the after party, expected me to get out of the Uber I was in with H so I could ride with her (her friends left her). She also told my grandmother unflattering things about H during my shower. My wedding was the last time I spoke to her.

Coming from someone who heavily heavily stressed over a similar situation for months leading up to the wedding, I wouldn’t invite your friend. Like you, I stressed that people would wonder where my friend was and if it would cause drama and omg, I stressed so much! If I could go back and do it all over again, she wouldn’t be anywhere near the invite list. Four months after the wedding, I haven’t talked to her and not one of our mutual friends have noticed or commented at all. It’s likely your ex-friend would also be invited to pre-wedding things and considering she acted quite dramatic over her birthday (it doesn’t matter if you have a full time job, you’re not obligated to attend every social event), I wouldn’t put it past her to create more drama.

I currently have a similar situation. My dilemma is I am friends with the husband and the husbands brother & wife but this woman I am not friends with anymore....not from lack of trying. I have been outcasted by her. She told my FH (bf at the time) I was no longer welcome at their house while she was inviting him to a bbq. Now she just found out we are engaged and again only contacted my FH to congratulate him after pretty much questioning why he proposed in sarcastic comments....but come on we know it was a slap in the face. I have known this woman longer than my FH. I went to their wedding over 10 yrs ago when things were fine. Also have to mention this woman is extremely judgmental and makes me feel like crap in her presence. I have had heated discussions with my FH about inviting them or not. I have no problem with the husband....was actually friends with him for half my life. Its just unfortunate he is controlled by his judgmental wife. Their kids also get punished for this behavior bc we used to get them xmas gifts and go to all bday parties until about 2 yrs ago.

My FH said we should invite them and I would be the bigger person...but I really don't want this woman anywhere near my wedding. I get very anxious and stressed when I know she is going to be at an event I am attending (we have the same circle of friends). I don't want to feel that way on my wedding day. Also if I am not welcome at your house (but my FH is) then why would you be welcome at my wedding.

I know their are going to be hurt feelings all around when making a guest list. But you have a lot of factors to think about....cost, type of friends they are, and etiquette. I don't know the right answers and I am getting a little less excited for the wedding bc of it.

I hope you don't fall into the same hole I have fallen into to. Good Luck

View Quoted Comment I’m sorry you’ve been stressing over this Sarah. It does seem like we’re in a similar situation. I can not believe she did all of those vile things! I’ve had friends in the past who were the same. Your situation has made me realize that I don’t have plans to keep up with this person in the future, so there’s no need to invite her for the sake of inviting her. If I do invite her, she’ll also probably know that it’s more because of our friend group than wanting her there specifically. It was the same thing when we were arguing. She got mad at me for not wishing her a happy birthday after she told me she needed space from me. I didn’t say anything because I was trying to respect that and then she got mad at me for that! Too much drama. She expected me to be a mind reader and if she’s there th day of, I can see her getting upset about not really paying attention to her.

I had a similar situation. My best friend growing up, met at age 6, decided to end our friendship when I started dating FH, 21 years old at the time. She made up a bunch of random excuses but she never even met him, we literally dated for like a month or two before she did this, but was herself in a bad relationship and this was my first serious relationship after high school, so I think she was mad about that. Well, I was devastated, my best friend of 15 years ditches our friendship just like that? She literally called me and said she was ending our friendship. So fast forward to about 5 years later and she starts reaching out again. Things are cordial, we hang out a couple times, but it's not the same whatsoever. She's not my best friend anymore, that ended when she made that phone call. Now I get engaged, and when she found out she wasn't going to be a bridesmaid she was so angry, saying how we always planned to be in each other's weddings and all this. I was like, uh yeah before you ended our friendship over the person I'm marrying.....? Needless to say, she is no longer invited. Way too much drama. I know that's bad to send a save the date and no invite, but after how she talked to me I was over it.