Shoe Disaster

I am a bridemaid in my cousins wedding and we all are wearing custom vans that she picked out. black and white checkered with sunflowers. we all paid for our own shoes which was no issue for any of us. the dresses are long and will cover the shoe as well.

At the end of the day, it’s your wedding and it’s about you and your significant other. They should respect your decisions!

I don’t want to sound mean (totally not my intention), but I’d tell them to suck it up. It’s one day out of their life to make you happy. If they want to sell the shoes the next day, so be it. 🤷🏻‍♀️

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Gotta agree with this. Its your wedding The dress can be hemmed as needed. They can have the shoes on just for photos and have nicer shoes on for the wedding ceremony and at the reception.

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I'll be devil's advocate here for a second. In general, I wouldn't be the bridesmaid to put up a fuss and would just do what asked. But as a point for consideration...

I would not be feeling my best with a nice dress and Vans with my legs exposed. I'm an average body type and don't love my legs. Tennis shoes do them no favors - cutting me off at the ankle - so I'd be feeling a bit frumpy for photos.

I agree with others that you purchasing the shoes would probably help ease the sting a bit. As another poster mentioned - there are other potentially more flattering styles of Vans. Maybe they could pick from a few different styles?

These types of disagreements play out differently with different groups, so do consider how much this could fracture friendships and consider if it is worth it.

View Quoted Comment So....all’s well that ends well! I guess I got a little too sensitive & was worried for absolutely nothing! They are going to wear them. They were just stating that they weren’t excited about it but it’s my wedding & if that’s what I want, that’s what I get. They’re just going to b#tch about it (in a most loving way, of course)! My circle is very close and very open. I have been friends with these girls longer than I have known my MOH (my 19 year old daughter)! We have gone through just about every phase of life together. Births, deaths, marriages, divorces. It was really silly of me to think that this was even an issue!


Thank you to everyone for your input!! Much love & happiness to you all! ❤️

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If they're willing to wear cowboy boots, they can wear vans. After your pictures are taken they can toss on whatever shoe they want. I think you can put your foot down. If the person who asked you to spend $1500 to be in her wedding party is one of those two... well she can deal.

If they didn't want to wear vans because their foot doesn't fit into it, that's a different story.