September 11 wedding?

We got married 9/9; the venue had 9/11 open and we declined it. Up to you guys if you can get over hearing 9/11 and not thinking of a traumatic time in history.

I think it depends on if you are okay with having your wedding anniversary on a horrible day in American history.

I would be much more concerned about coming off as insensitive and tone deaf than having bad luck.

All depends on what you guys want & your personal preferences. Only frame of reference I have to give you is, my mother passed away on my birthday 3 years ago. It still hurts but I can’t think of it as my birthday anymore but as the day my mom passed away. It’s gotten easier to deal with & I try to “celebrate” my birthday but it’ll never be the same.... good luck on your decision.

I think it depends on you and your guests. Our venue had 9/11 available and we chose not to because my dad and family friends were NYPD and have personally been impact by 9/11.

It's no worse or different than Dec 7 which is far enough removed that people have already long forgotten that date and countless others completely, except it being a similar thing much more recently. It is possible to acknowledge that yes a somber event happened on a particular day but you don't stop living life on that day.

That was one of the days we could have chosen to postpone to. It would be the 20th anniversary.

I just...couldn't do it. I understand why people would if it was the only day they could have.

I think it's fine. I have a cousin who's birthday is 9/11, is he not supposed to celebrate? People are being judgey but they likely don't acknowledge 9/11 other than with an Instagram post to their story. Unless maybe you're in NYC or have guests who were personally affected, I think you're fine.

View Quoted Comment I agree with this 100%!!. It's not any different from Dec 7 which kicked off WW2 and only people from that generation acknowledge it in any way. It doesn't register on anyone's radar today as having any significance, even in school history books. Life goes on so let people celebrate without judgment.

I think it's fine to do it on that day. We can't just stop our lives on certain days because something tragic happened on that day many years ago. People have birthdays, anniversary, etc on that day. Should people's birthdays and anniversaries just be voided and shunned if they celebrate because of what happened years ago on that day. Don't get me wrong it's a hard day in history, I still remember that day like it was yesterday, I remember where I was when it happened. But I'm still going to live my life and do what I want regardless of it being 9/11. If 9/11 taught us anything it should be to live our lifes the way we want and to the fullest because you never know when your life can stop. I say have it on that day and maybe you can do like a dedication table or like a moment of silence at the reception. Something to still honor and remember that day.

Another thing is that it also depends on your crowd. Our wedding guests wouldn't be upset or offended at all if I got married on 9/11. But there are other out there who might not see it the same way as my crowd. And others who have been seriously affected by that day who might get offended. So you need to know your crowd and go off of how they would feel.

Why is it such a bad thing for someone to want to "redeem" a bad day and have it remembered as something good for them???? like others have said, they have birthdays, anniversaries, and other things on that day, should they be reprimanded over that date they want to celebrate?? or is it cuz it's too soon?? cuz uh, let me remind you all... Valentine's day is a day st. valentine DIED, St. Patrick's Day is the the day St. Patrick DIED, Memorial Day we celebrate soldiers who have DIED for us.... and Dec7, pearl Harbor day, I see no problem wanting to remember something good on Sep 11 as well, unless your family or an immediate guest has lost someone due to 9/11 then MAYBE not, but otherwise I say go for it!!!

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This.

We got married IN NYC, so 9/11 would be a super bad choice (not to mention, FIL worked for the NYPD for years - as a civilian - but he lost members of his crew on that day). And, y'know, DH grew up there, so that day is just *rough* for him.

But if we lived in say... South Carolina... I don't think it would matter.

There are tragic events for *any* day in history. (For instance, Anne Boleyn was executed on my birthday, and Jackie Kennedy died on my birthday.) It's just about which ones resonate with your crowd.

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I agree with this advice!

View Quoted Comment I agree that all of the dates you mentioned we do celebrate, but they all happened before our time (yes, there are still a handful of vets still alive from WWII). However, we all saw 9/11 unfold live before our eyes and even after so many years it's still raw. I think especially next year with the 20th anniversary the memorial events will be bigger than ever. I don't think anyone would begrudge you for having a wedding this day (Covid brides should be granted a reprieve from any judgement this year and next) but I know as a guest, I would definitely attend yet would feel guilty celebrating, as I would have the memories from that fateful day lingering in my mind.

View Quoted Comment That is how you would feel, however not everyone has that same feeling for many reasons. Yes it was a very sad day and my crowd and I feel bad for the people who have been seriously affected by that day. However I as well as the people I know wouldn't have sore feeling or feelings of guilt when attending a wedding or an celebration. Nobody I know would bat an eye over someone celebrating their birthday or having a wedding on that day. That's why when it comes to this situation it really depends on where she lives, where she is having her wedding and the people attending the wedding on whether or not it would be fine to have the wedding on 9/11.

Dont think it would be bad luck but I personally would not get married that day. Most people regard that day as a day of remembrance and may not want to be celebrating, especially if you are talking about 2021? That will be the 20th anniversary and especially emotional for people

When we postponed our September wedding to next year that was the only date in September that was available for our vendors. We declined, and moved it to August instead.