Second guessed my wedding dress, not sure how to share with my immediate family i got a new dress?

You should absolutely feel amazing in your dress. My sister changed hers, and as closest family who had been with her when she selected the first dress and not there when she chose the second.... sure we were a bit disappointed the moment we'd shared with her wasn't in the dress she ended up wearing on her day, but she felt so much better in the new dress, and that's all that really mattered to us! It's your day, not your relative's, so you should wear what makes you feel most beautiful!

You could just white lie and be like, "the alterations lady totally ruined the dress - I can't even get into it now. She cut the hem too short, the bodice didn't fit, and there was nothing for it but to buy a new one, thank GOODNESS I found one off the rack. No, I think I'd like it to be a surprise for the day, but I LOVE it and am so much happier than the dress I had before, especially after it was spoilt - I know you'll love it too, and I can't wait to share it with you on the day'

I'm sorry you felt that way but I'm also very happy that you found the dress of your dreams. That's all that matters and honestly, tell them straight out how you felt and that you think you made the right decision for yourself and your happiness. If your family can't deal with it, that's on them. Or you can totally surprise them the day of and just don't say anything lol.

Yes! Just don't tell them!

If it is any consolation, I wanted to comment to reassure you that you are actually not alone in this type of situation as I am struggling with the same dilemma myself!

I bought my original wedding dress last summer with my mother, sister, and MIL in-tow. They were so excited about every single dress so the first one I actually thought I liked, they swooned over it. With the combination of their excitement, it being the first shop I visited, feeling the need to plan things immediately (really bought into those "need your dress by 8 months out, no exceptions!!" timelines), and the dress being under budget, I impulsively said yes and purchased it. While I kind of regretted it immediately, I convinced myself it was just because I hadn't gotten it in my size yet and once it arrived and I got it tailored, I'd love it. Paid for the alterations and turned out, I disliked it even more.

Fast-forward, our February wedding got postponed to next February so I stewed about it all year and tried to convince myself that I spent the money so I'm stuck with it and everyone will be really judgmental if I bought a second dress. However, my husband (COVID weddings, you know) talked sense into me and offered to go shopping with me the past couple of weeks so I didn't have to invite any of them this time and could really make the choice myself.

I ended up finding another dress that I actually do love. Even did the sensible thing and took a couple days to think about it before trying it on again and deciding to buy it.

I come from a lower middle-class family where money has always been a sensitive topic. My husband and I are lucky in that we are in good places financially and therefore tend to be better off than most of my immediate family so the thought of telling them I essentially double my cost of my dress by buying a second one sounds super stressful.

But the moral of the story is pretty simple: it is your wedding day. It is your dress that you get to wear for this one occasion. And if you're going to spend lots of money on something, it should be something you want to wear! No one else's opinion really matters in the end.

In regard to telling them or not, do what you feel is going to be less stressful for you! Want to get it out of the way before the wedding? Do that. Want to surprise everyone at the wedding? Do that. Whatever works best for YOU.

For me, personally, I think I'm going to wait until my dress is in, altered and ready to go then tell them ahead of time. Likely a girls night or a wedding planning night where I can try it on and they can still have that moment as a group of being able to see me in it before the rest of the guests.

No matter how you do it (or don't do it!), so happy for you that you found a dress you love and can be excited to wear on your wedding day! Congratulations!!

Kristin gave such a beautiful response to your similar situations so I'll echo her and everyone:

Your dress, your decision

Please don't feel bad, upset, scared, or worried about choosing a dress you love and that goes double for your tattoos showing or not. Its amazing that you found a dress you love and could get altered in time - truly a blessing!