Sad Bride

Hi Pookie,

Yes some of us can afford things but a lot of us are DIYing it and have also cut back on costs. Ive cut down the guest list a lot, gone for a cheaper day of the week for a wedding, cut out real flowers, no wedding planner, no florist, im making my bouquets, centrepieces, save the dates and invitations. The majority of us are doing it all ourselves so if you have in mind things you would like for your wedding let us know and we'll try to help you find ways to DIY.

Your dream is what you make it...in all reality, my dream wedding would take place at the base of the eiffel tower, followed by a honeymoon in the swiss alps, and flying every person on our guest list...BUT my bigger dream is not to go broke! so, my girlhood dream(above), has turned into a church ceremony, and a good old fashioned(but very nice and organized) backyard reception lit with white string lights, and candles...it doesn't matter how much money you have. although your wedding is important, the act of GETTING married, is more important the the wedding itself...i was working on a budget of 2 grand for 30 people...but due to buying a house, on a whim quite literally, i just knocked by budget down to around 1100...will it be sad for me? nope, b/c the same people will be there, and our friends and family will be with us, and the most important part? my fiance and i, along with our son, and his children, will finally be a family...that's more important...cont'd

If we could, and were able to do it, we'd say screw the wedding period, and use that money to go get fh's 2 older children, and we'd go for a vacation and get hitched just us 5...but even if we had thousands of thousands of dollars, other things won't let that happen...but again, if you feel you don't have the money to do it exactly how you want it, then save and do it later...

We are still thinking on doing later or on the date plan. thanks a lot.

Or maybe we'll just do it the tow of us with few family. lol,,,few family in Africa is like a whole lot of guest. hhahaha

Pookster-

Please believe that you can have your dream wedding on a budget! Alot of us here didn't have unlimited funds and huge white castles, etc. However, if you look real good and compromise here and there you'll find gems in the mud/diamonds in the rough or however that saying goes. And...if you feel bummed about not being able to afford something I betcha someone will pop up with a cool alternative. **Chances** has posted a few great ideas for a couple of brides already. Laura K and wowjunkie had a few cut corner ideas too just to name a few. WW is a great place to be especially if you just want to vent!

Don't fret! ( so cliche-smiles-) Welcome to WW- a place of wonderful ladies with a sense of humor, fashion sense and sometimes brut honesty!

Pookie, Believe me hunny, I an in NO WAY can afford my dream wedding, I can't even afford my dream venue thats so no, you are not alone! There are a lot of brides that do DIY projects, welcome to WW. PPL here are so nice and supportive, I am sure you will find a shoulder to cry on here whenever you need. Don't worry, everything will be just fine.

Thanks so much to all of you for these strong wods. I really feel good saying it, because i really wanted to tell someone that will help me not someone that will laugh at me. atleast i've gotten hope here and i promise to keep you all inform about any development.

Thanks oncemore.

There is no way I can afford my dream wedding...our wedding is what we can afford, and a lot of it is DIY..Theonly thing that matters in the end is that you're married to the man you love!

Dream Wedding? Hummmm. My dream was to find someone that LOVED ME and my KIDS. Someone who would treat me with respect and dignity, someone I could trust and love and know he would love me back just as much. The "wedding" is pomp. It's nice, but having someone you can trust, respect, love, that is more important. We had a beatiful wedding and reception for right at 1500.00. The wedding is what YOU make it.

Me and my fh are making almost everything in our wedding from invitations to the arch we will be standing under, and our bridesmaid dresses.. If you need any help or ideals dont be scared to ask.. I personally have gotten alot of help and hope I have helped some people to.. Good luck

Gershelda said it all, and I'm sure all of us agree! I seriously doubt any of us are having our "dream" wedding, we're just making the wedding that we CAN have the best that it can be. We've all put a lot of hard work in and most of us have done a lot of the work ourselves, hunted for bargains, borrowed, and shared. We were going to have a caterer, but have decided to make the food ourselves to save $1500.00! We didn't want to have to do the extra work, but in order for us to afford the wedding we want, it has become necessary! Keep your head high, and don't be afraid to ask us any questions, even if you think it's stupid, we'll help all we can! You can have a beautiful wedding on a small budget!

Actually I would love to have a my dream wedding outside were you can see the water and in a tent. My dream wedding would cost so much that I know I would not be able to do. The wedding I will be having will be nice and I will love it, but I am stilling trying to figure out how am I going to pay for it, but what I am doing is leave it in GOD hands and let him show me the way. My parents are helping out and it is a lot on everyone, but I know some how we will get through this as we had gottan through many more situations. Just hold your head up and think outside the box. What I realize of doing all of this planning is everyone sells the same items, it is were you purchase it from to get the best deals. Keep your eyes open. If you need help on looking for something let me know I had done so much research.

Dear Pookie:

Hey, try to maintain an upbeat attitude. Let's face it, the economy in this country is very weak right now. Except for those in a few select professions -- the Wall Street guys, the Silicon Valley guys, the doctors, etc. -- most of us, the vast middle class and working class people are really struggling right now.

And frankly, the worst thing you can do financially is to start out your married life together by over-extending yourself with wedding costs.

In our society, do we act sometimes as though money can buy happiness --even though in our heart and soul we know that it can't (look at the all the miserable, troubled rich celebrities one reads about in the gossip pages), we are constantly barraged with images telling us to buy this, buy that, to make us happy. Frankly, millions of Americans right now are struggling just to pay for food & shelter & health care -- never mind the luxuries!

Pookie,

My dream wedding would take place in Turks and Caicos with about 200 plus guests overlooking a beach. I would have the $8,000 Monique Lhullier silk organza gown of my dreams, my flowers would be blue and white orchids and calla lillies and my invitations would be the $950 for 100 Vera Wang invites I saw. Point is, I am having my dream wedding without all that because ultimately, I am marrying the man of my dreams. I may have had to choose the things that I can afford and take the necessary amount of time to afford them but in the end whether it be in Turks and Caicos or Dave and Busters or anything in between. It's about the love you share and becoming one. You can have the wedding of your dreams sweetheart, you just have to find a way to celebrate uniting with your other half in a way that makes you both happy that won't put you in the poor house.

Well said ladies and I can certainly relate MrsOfficer! Pookie you aren't alone. Stay positive and don't be afraid to ask for suggestions. Your wedding will be beautiful because it is your special day!

I agree with everyone else. Your dream wedding is what yuo make it. My dream wedding is to get married at Disney World right in front of the castle at night (the castle changes colors and it's beautiful). I did find my dream dress for $499 though, so that's not bad. But if I could afford it I'd have a lot more things that I want because they're pretty. Instead of getting married in Disney World I've settled for a very nice building in my home town. So, don't worry. You'll make it a beautiful wedding without going broke. A lot of things are still very pretty if you do it yourself.

Hey pookie,

Like the other ladies have already said many of us can't afford our dream wedding but we are making it special anyway on a lower budget. I used to dream about a huge expensive dress & 200 people etc. but we are having under 100 ppl and choosing a less expensive venue etc. & doing a lot of things ourselves and with help, diy etc. It will still be the perfect day & we wont be starting our marriage off in debt. We are all here for each other through the process with ideas & support.

I personally put off my wedding several times because of money issues. We want a small family ceremony but not a JP service so we are waiting till we get better situation. DIY and unussual choices make what I want affordable. Between my first marrage and our son we have 3 kids to care for and thats what comes first family.

My dream wedding would be 300 guest with chiavri chairs unlimited alchol, and a buffet. Fi and I are paying for this wedding 100%, that's why we have planned a 2.9 yr engagement. Don't think you're alone, I have BILLS BILLS BILLS, and trying to go to school and work. You have to take what you can afford and make it happen!