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Beginner October 2019

Rsvp holdouts

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Katie, on October 15, 2019 at 6:46 AM

Posted in Planning 22

Our wedding is in 11 days! How did that happen?! It’s both exciting and terrifying! :-D Our RSVP date was October 1st, and we sent the invitations out the second week of August, since so many of my FH’s side will be traveling. We’re down to our last few holdouts on RSVPs, and now we’re to the point our venue is wanting final numbers. I contacted these guests late September, and they assured me they were coming, and once they figured out travel logistics they’d send the RSVP back. They’ll be traveling across country, so I totally understand it’s a lot to figure out, but that was 3 weeks ago now that I spoke to them, and still no word if they’re for sure coming. I’m not sure what to do. I hate to bother them again, I really feel like I’m pestering asking twice, but our vendor needs the final count by Friday. I feel like with how far they’d have to travel if they haven’t gotten logistics figured out by now, they’d be hard pressed to really make it. We totally understand if they can’t. East Coast to California is a long way, so we always knew many of his friends and family wouldn’t be able to make the trip, but do I just assume at this point they’re not coming? RSVPs has definitely been the hardest part of this process!

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22 Comments

Beginner October 2019
Katie · on October 16, 2019 at 9:07 AM
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That's kind of how I feel! I mean, isn't that what the Save the Dates are for? So you can start planning WAY in advance. I had an aunt call my dad and ask what day the wedding was, and my dad's response was, "Oh, did you not get a save the date? I'm sorry." And my aunt said, "Sure, I got one. I don't know where it is. I think I threw it away." What he heck is the point in the save the dates if no one bothers to save the date? Blah!
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Beginner October 2019
Katie · on October 16, 2019 at 12:14 PM
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We are totally the ones losing money. People don't seem to understand this isn't a house party where you can maybe show up, or maybe not and it won't matter either way. I saw one article that suggested just to RSVP 'yes' for those you haven't heard from, just in case they do show up and that way you won't worry about running out of food. That's all well and good if you have the money for it, and maybe budgeted that way, but if you do that for even just a few people you could be talking several hundred dollars! Yikes! I know we couldn't afford that! That's money that could go elsewhere! Hence, RSVP is so important!
I imagine every venue is different. Our venue doesn't need total final count until a week before the wedding, so maybe check with yours what your absolute drop date is. I'd think most would be willing to work with you if you had last minute cancelations, but they might suggest you put the difference towards something else that they offer. I hope they're willing to work with you!
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