RSVP- Alist and B List

We are sending out our A list invites early 10-11 weeks out. With an RSVP of about 8 weeks out. That way the B list invites will go out around the "normal" time. =)

I agree. Have two different deadlines this way you can give the final head count in two weeks. Just remember that 10-30% of the people on your guest list will decline. Numbers will change so many times. And most people will not send their RSVP back in the mail. Most of the time you will have to contact them which you will need about a week or a couple of days to do so.

I'm sending out my invites the first week of May...with the RSVP date like a month and a half before my wedding date. I have to give my final head count to my venue July 1st..and I dont want to be stressing about contacting people a couple weeks before that.

I'm not doing an A and B list....I'm just sending everyone the same invites.

Im not doing a B list. if people can't come from A. then yaa me less money to spend.

I think any time you do an A/B list, someone is going to figure it out. So I personally don't think it's a good idea, b/c you could really hurt someone's feelings without realizing it. But there are a couple of timeline suggestions on this thread, if you're set on it:

https://www.weddingwire.com/wedding-forums/ab-list/da1070560a14e27b.html

@Reina, totally!

My A List is wayyyy too long. Many of FH's list lives far far away. I am sending those invites out at soon as I can, and will send my very few B list invites out if they decline.

I sent out my invites yesterday.. there is only one person that we might not invite and if we do we will send the invite at the beginning of March.. so they will only have a few days to get back to us. FH family doesnt like this person. So I have one person on the B list.

This is my example from the post kris listed incase you don't go to it.

First find out when your final head count is due

Then you start to work backwards

With an "A" and "B" list.... the "B" list shouldn't be TOO big, so there shouldn't be too many names to hunt down. Your "B" list RSVP can be around 7 -9 days before your head count is due. You would "like" the "B-list" to have 2.5 - 3 weeks to respond to the RSVP so it doesn't "feel" like a "B-list" (the mail out date for B-list is RSVP date for A-list)

Then count back another 3 - 4 weeks for when you mail out the "A" list.

Ex. Wedding 6/30

Head count due 6/22

RSVP "B-list" June 13 (should have all back by the 18th)

RSVP "A-list" May 21th (mail out 1 B-list as each "no" comes in - this date give B-list almost 3 weeks to respond * and is 5 weeks before the wedding)

Mail out "A-list" April 20th * 10 weeks before the wedding * (They should all receive them by April 25th - gives them just under 4 weeks to respond)

Be sure people in the same circle of friends are on the same list. Don't want an "A-list" talking to a "B"

"Etiquette" says invites are to be mailed 6 - 8 weeks before the wedding (some stretch it to 8 - 10 for Destination and out-of-town guests) And your guest should have about 3 or 4 weeks to respond to an RSVP after they receive it (any longer and they forget and toss it aside thinking "oh, I have all the time in the world to respond to that")

....so, if your Head count is due 2 weeks before the wedding, that would push all my example dates back one week. B-list Would be 6 weeks out then. (perfectly normal time line)

The only "issue" I see with the "A-list" is that you are asking them to RSVP a little early. 4 weeks before the wedding should try to be your target ... with the "B-list" you need to have an "A-list" RSVP of 5 - 6 weeks before the wedding. This can make it kinda difficult for some to accurately respond and you might be hunting more down than if it was a later date

We are only doing an A and B list because our ceremony venue has a max of 30. So we are inviting close friends and family to that. IF there are spots open, others can be invited to the ceremony...however...EVERYONE is invited to the reception. We just have to be slightly picky on the ceremony. =(