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VIP April 2017

Rounding up, do I need to?

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E&E2017, on March 15, 2017 at 12:23 PM

Hey everyone! My day is fast approaching and my RSVP date is tomorrow, with a final count due next week to my venue. My best friend (BM who has been helping tremendously) is telling me "make sure you tell your venue at least ten more than actually rsvp'd for the people that didn't rsvp but show up anyway." I get that she doesn't want anyone to be excluded, but at the same time I feel like if I gave someone a pre-stamped envelope and they couldn't take the five seconds to put it in the mailbox, and then I call them to follow up and still don't get an answer, why am I going to pay to have them? I just feel like other people's lack of planning is not my problem. So do I give the venue the actual count? Or do I really have to "round up" for the stragglers? I really do not feel like it is my job to hunt people down and harass them to see if they are coming. But maybe I'm being a bitch here? Is my BM correct here?

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24 Comments

Dedicated June 2017
Blue eyed bride · on March 15, 2017 at 3:12 PM
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We will be planning on a few extras for those that just show up but it's a wedding n you took your own time and money to send those invitations they could at least rsvp. My MOH will be making calls about 2 weeks prior to rsvp date to those that didn't respond
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VIP April 2017
E&E2017 · on March 15, 2017 at 4:15 PM
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@mrs D I've been thinking the same thing. The amount of no-shows should theoretically balance out the amount of people who randomly show up without rsvp'ing I would think.
My venue told me to give them an actual count so I'm going to just go ahead and trust them on this. They are the expert here, not me or my friend!
I appreciate your advice guys, I've been feeling guilty that I'm not bending over backwards for extra people.
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Super October 2018
FutureMrsComo · on March 15, 2017 at 4:19 PM
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Uhhh my venue is all inclusive so I'm close to $200pp prior to tax and service so I'd say hell no to 10 extras. My wedding is small, however, so I feel like I won't have any issue asking people if they're coming or not if they forget to RSVP.
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Expert October 2017
SarahHoff · on March 15, 2017 at 4:29 PM
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The point of having an RSVP is so you know the exact count. I wouldn't round up at all.
If people show up who didn't RSVP (or RSVP'd no and came anyway), you can do you best to accommodate them. But if you can't... that's their fault, not yours.
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