Risky Subject: Over-inviting!

I think we ended up extending invites by about 6 over our venue capacity. We didn't make our guest list that way, but people had boyfriends we didn't know about and things like that. It's all good though! We had about 40 declines and most people are OOT.

We over-invited (thanks FMIL!) and could now potentially have 33 over what the venue sits. There were quite a few people we thought for sure wouldn't come that now are. Fuuuucckkkk.

We invited 62 but only have seats for 48 (6 tables of 8). We didn't even realize what we had done until we sent STDs. But that included teenage and twenty something children of our friends. Looks like we will have about 41-45 so it all worked out whew!

I'm not sure that 7 people counts as over-inviting

My room only holds 150, and we invited closer to 170. We are having 134 guests, i was planning for 135 so we planned accurately.

Over-inviting by 7 is STILL over-inviting. You better hope that at least 7 people don't want to come to your wedding, which doesn't seem like the right mindset to be in when planning a wedding.

Invite only the number of people your venue can COMFORTABLY hold. Don't make your guests wish they didn't attend.

Lots of commenter have said they have recieved lots of 'yes' RSVPs back so far, and few, if any declines. To this I want to add that there is a good chance declines may come in later. People can hold off on sending an RSVP back if they're considering it, or trying to find a way to come. Guests who are certain they can come will RSVP yes right away. Unsure people may wait longer. Some people may forget to send a response until right before your RSVP date, or may even wait until after that. :-o

And even of the 'yes' responses, you sometimes get a few last-minute cancelations.

@Anna We invited a LOT of people we knew would not be making it - FH's grandfather, my grandmother and aunt, people overseas. We still counted them in the total, but knew they would be sending back nos.

@Marianne exactly. Most people who RSVPed no send their invitation back right at the deadline, or didn't sent back at all.

Over-inviting by 7 isn't too bad, but I'm guessing people who over invited more than 20 people have never been crammed into a room at max capacity. It's hard to enjoy the meal that your hosts paid so much for when your elbows touch on either side of your table of 12 and pulling out your chair results in hitting the table behind you. I hope you get your ideal number (not max) for your guest's sake.

@rosie9615 i know it's so silly! FH is very methodical and made us rate people based on the likelihood they would attend. 1's were us and our parents obviously who were 100%. 0.9's were other people who told us they would attend (although leaving a bit of a buffer since it's destination). 0.5's were maybes, etc and the list went on. He insists it will be accurate but I dunno...

Oh god, when I read the title all I could think was that it was over inviting by like half again or double or something crazy like I always see people do. I don't see any problem with 7 with how large your list is. If *I* had over invited by 7 it would have been a massive problem since my venue only holds 40 comfortably and like 45 MAX (seated anyhow). So with how small our guest list is everyone is very close to either FH or myself and we are expecting a fairly high yes rate. We didn't even want to go 1 over, just in case. But with a larger wedding you'll probably get a more typical response rate and I don't see a problem here.

We over invited by about 30. We only need 7 more declines to be under the venue limit, and at least 6 guests I can pretty much count on not coming. I also anticipate about 5-7 no shows because I have a few flaky cousins.

We over-invited by waaay more than 7. We had at least 8 people that had told us beforehand that they couldn't come, but we sent them an invite regardless to let them know we would have wished for them to be there.

And we kind of risked it for a few more people because they were out of town, out of province, some were out of the country and 3 even were out of the continent, lol.

Over inviting by 7-14 will not be a cause for concern. We invited 340 (including plus ones for everyone and all children) and our venue seats a max of 340, ironically. But we knew there would be a lot of declines, so didn't pay attention to that number. We have a minimum of 200 adults, but want to be around 200 for size and budget. We could go up to 340 budget wise, we just didn't want to. Currently, we have 94 Yes and 58 No out of 340.

It's really a "know your crowd" situation. Sometimes, like in our case, there are family members and family friends that you HAVE to invite, but know they won't show up. Getting a 100% acceptance is usually rare, but I have seen it happen with friends who have a wedding over 300 people (more like 99% since there were morning of disasters like car accidents). Also, don't forget to include yourself and your vendors in the count.

I don't think 7 is that bad. When I saw that you over-invited I initially thought you were talking 30 people. It pretty likely that 7 people will decline, I'm sure you will be just fine.

I thought I over invited by 18 but my venue just informed me the limit is 120. I was hoping to keep it around 80.

My venue held 350 seating wise. With our wedding party that took away some and then adding the cake table and dj to the floor took away room. We had table for 280 minus wedding party and my RSVP count was around 350 by wedding week. I was freaking out and the lady at my venue reassured me it would be ok. The over flow of people could sit on this other area. In my head i was thinking, this sounds like a disaster. I don' want people eating out of their laps. Come later in the week before the wedding I had several people and families back out at last minute apologizing that they couldn't make it. Luckily we didn't pay by the person for food. The day of came and i looked out into the crowd and not one person had to sit anywhere besides the tables. It worked out perfectl. Everything will be ok and work out in the end!

Depends the ratio. If you invited 27 for a venue that fits 20? Ruh roh. If you invited 357 for a venue that fits 350 you're fine.

I did. I felt obligated to at least send an invite to about 20 distant family members/old family friends we haven't talked to in years. FH sucked at trimming his list and insisted on inviting everyone, including some out of town, B-list friends that we maybe see once a year on vacations to Florida. There are a few couples that will only have 1 person attend the wedding too. I'm thinking I'll end up in the high 160's-170 range. It'll be a tight squeeze, but whatever.

We want 75 people and are inviting 85, but if they all show we'll deal with it.