Rehearsal Dinner/Meet and Greet Opinions

I think it sounds like two weddings.

We are doing the same thing in the hotel where we reserved a block. I agree that that seems like a lot of people. Are you sure everyone is coming into town on Friday night?

Honestly...I wouldn't even plan anything more than picking a location for drinks and letting everyone know that this is where you will be.

I'm in a similar situation. We'll have 90% of our 100 or so guests coming from out of town so we wanna do something for them, but keep the rehearsal dinner for just the bridal party and our immediate family, because as Celia said, it woulda been like a second reception.

So our solution was to keep the rehearsal small and later that night after the dinner we're hosting welcome drinks for out of towners (and in towners, if they want to come).

Almostmrs- No, we're not sure that everyone will come to town that night or be there by 6pm so we're not sure how to plan it. Who are you inviting to the hotel?

We feel like we should invite all the out of towners and whoever can come will. We're not really sure how else to plan it...any ideas?

We're doing something similar - a dessert welcome party. It's low key and open to anyone. It's also in a park that we have rented out - so it's cheap. We're providing a keg and some wine, as well as desserts. We've asked our mothers and step-mothers to each make a few things for desserts to be offered (cookies, brownies, etc). We'll have games there for kiddos too. It's going to be pretty cheap and right after the rehearsal dinner (and in the same location). I think it's a great way for everyone to get to know each other - just make sure you aren't stressing out too much with planning it. We'll purposefully making it extremely low key.

We sent rehearsal dinner invites to everyone that RSVP'd yes to our destination wedding, with a note to please RSVP via email if coming. 65 of our 86 guests will be there, but we're just doing a taco bar from Chipotle and getting a bunch of wine and beer from Sam's Club. It will be at an uncle's house, which is large enough to accommodate that many. It looks like the weather will cooperate, so we're also taking advantage of the fire pit and outdoor space for games.

Quite a few friends and family will be in town Thursday, but we're not doing anything formal or hosted. We're trying to get people together for drinks and karaoke, but that's strictly word-of-mouth.

Abdicate, seriously. Pick a location, tell people that others are going to gather, and take no responsibility for entertaining/hosting/paying.

Even though it seems like a lot, we're actually hosting a private cruise the night before the wedding because basically the entire invite list is flying into Santa Barbara. We're providing the cruise and some food, and then there's a cash bar. I know it's a lot, but when we decided on SB for the wedding, my mom got really excited at the idea of something on the water and hey if she wants to plan and pay for it...

We are including info about this in the invitation itself, and not distinguishing between local/non-local. We're also not having a rehearsal dinner (we're doing a private brunch the day after instead), so this is kinda like the dinner in that people will likely give toasts. But since we don't have a bridal party, there wasn't a need for the full-on rehearsal.

Yes, it's another event for people to attend. But I've traveled for every wedding I've been to, and I so appreciate the opportunity to mingle with other guests and be with the bride and groom for more than the crazy wedding day itself. Sounds like fun!

I feel like if it's a wedding weekend that requires travel, then you should provide something for the out of town guests.

It's clearly not two weddings. It's a welcome dinner & a wedding. If anyone thinks my welcome dinner is going to be on the same level as the wedding, they're insane.... But it is our responsibility to entertain guests who have made the travel plans.

Thanks everyone! Yeah, I'm not worried about it being two weddings because it would only be a couple hours, drinks and apps, no dancing....and we won't have gotten married prior. So, it's definitely not a second wedding!

I guess the main question was regarding our local friends. It's ok to not invite a few of our local friends and non-immediate relatives to the welcome dinner who will be coming to the wedding, right? I don't want them to feel like everyone else got together the night before and they didn't meet anyone...but we want it to be smaller than the actual wedding.

We're having a DW and everyone is out of town - we're having a little meet and greet in the hotel lobby. Details will be included in each guests welcome bag and whoever wants to stop by is welcome to join. The majority of our friends who married recently have done something similar.

I think people understand that out of towners get a little something else because they need something to do the night before the wedding.