Rehearsal dinner

I think you should skip the rehearsal dinner if you can't cover your guests.

Guests shouldn't pay for themselves, but if you plan on having a rehearsal then you should really feed those that participate. I would do something simple so that you aren't paying a ton of money for it.

If you can’t fund a standard dinner, then do something simple in order to feed your guests, Whether it’s pizza, tacos, subway sandwiches, etc. But don’t make your guests pay

We're doing pasta and pizza for 45. Budgeting $200.

The purpose of a rehearsal dinner is to thank those in attendance for coming to the rehearsal. Asking them to pay for themselves defeats the purpose. If you can’t afford to pay, skip the rehearsal.

I see no point in rehearsal dinner, so I recommend you to skip it. in my experience, some drama goes down during a rehearsal dinner.

In a time when bride's parents or grandparents paid for the wedding and much of the reception, many groom's families paid the RD and bar cost. But that is not real common now. If anyone offers to host, you may let them. Otherwise, you plan and pay for it. RD are not required. You can invite just your own attendants to a lunch or dinner or for drinks,before or after the wedding, in the week before, or soon after the wedding, and say thank you. And Groom do the same. People coming from out of town can meet local people, or each other, for dinner. You need not have a special dinner at all. People can take care of themselves, and you can see a few people or not. But, if you do organize a dinner, for all the wedding party and any SO, as a RD, you have to pay the bill ( or another host does.) Guests from your wedding or WP do not pay when you ask them to join you for a planned dinner.

You really have two options:

1. Skip the rehearsal, in which case you don't need to have a rehearsal dinner at all.

2. Have a rehearsal dinner which you pay for. This need not include a lot of people--just the ones participating in the rehearsal and their SOs--and can be as informal as take-out pizza.

However, the rehearsal dinner is supposed to be a thank you to the people who participated in the rehearsal. You can't make them pay for it themselves.

You should either pay, or skip it

If you can't afford it, skip it.

Skip dinner- Maybe just have appetizers or light snacks and have the rehearsal "dinner" earlier in the day.

If you have a rehearsal, you must feed the people who attend. Pizza will do, but you must feed them. On your dime. Or don't have a rehearsal.

I think the most important thing is that if you communicate clearly. I think that being there for the rehearsal is an obligation you commit to if you accept to be in the wedding party, food or not. You can pay for something super casual, like pizza or sandwiches. You do NOT have to provide alcohol or an open bar or anything like that. But, I would communicate to your guest what they can expect- whether it is dinner at your place and BYOB, or dinner and a cash bar, whatever.

You can also have dinner where it is on your guest's dime. To do this, I would 1. pick a place that is NOT expensive. Don't ask your guest to pay and then pick the upscale steak house and 2. don't get mad if you have guest that decline to attend. Yes, it would be nice for everyone to be there, but if you choose to have a gathering that is not paid for, if people decide on different plans, be okay with it. The biggest thing is to just be up front. Most guest do not care what you pick as long as they know and as long as you don't freak out should they decline to attend.

Honestly, a lot of people who say you HAVE to have food would personally never confront a close friend or family member and demand that they be fed or they won't be attending the rehearsal.

If you are requiring a rehearsal (which is an optional event) you need to host your guests. That includes some food that you are providing. It doesn't need to be fancy. For my sister's rehearsal dinner my mom hosted it at her house and made homemade spaghetti with a few different salads. She had homemade cookies for dessert. There was no alcohol. It was cheap and yummy.
There are a lot of inexpensive options, but you would need to host something or go without a rehearsal.

I would skip the rehearsal dinner (so skip the rehearsal) or do something super casual like pizza.

If you cannot afford to pay for the dinner, you should skip the rehearsal and the dinner. If you have the rehearsal, you need to cover the dinner. Order pizzas! It is cheap and easy. The dinner doesn't have to be anything fancy.