Rehearsal Dinner Question - UPDATED

The last rehearsal dinner I went to was the wedding party & their significant others, the bride & groom's parents and siblings (& significant others) and their grandparents.

Usually it is the bridal party and immediate families of the bride and groom. I think sometimes, people invite family and friends that have traveled from out of town before the wedding. It's a nice gesture, but it's not a must. Is your aunt coming in from out of town? I think it's okay to tell your aunt the rehearsal dinner is just for the bridal party, parents and grandparents due to space and budget. She should understand.

Or, is she doing a reading or a part of the ceremony in another way? Besides immediate family, bridal party and significant others, the officiant and anyone doing readings- I woulnd't worry about offending her. Like Donna J said, she shoudl understand

We did the bridal their sig. others. our readers and their sig. other our parents and grandmothers. any rehearsal i went to its been the bridal party and parents and the dates

Those who need to be at the rehearsal go to the RD. And yes, if you'd like to include OOT guests that's nice, but not required.

Don't add the stress of hosting a 70 people dinner the night before. You seriously don't need that.

Bridal party, MOB, FOB, FMIL, FFIL, and those peoples dates

My FH aunt also asked me this...I just told her I would invite them its totally their option to come or not since they live close to us, she has 3 teens so I think her worry what what will be going on with them, since Aug is sports season practice tryouts etc...but i am inviting BP, Parents, grents, and then our aunts uncles cuzs bc 2 young cuzs are RB & FG so id like them to be there and most other fam of mine is from FL NC PA etc so they will be flying in that day of rehersal so it seems to me the right thing to do is to invite them to the dinner bc theyre coming out for us.

From what i understood the rehearsal dinner was for anyone involved with the ceremony - so bridal party, readers, singers, bride, groom, immediate family. sometimes out of town guests however not required.

I invited my aunt and uncle only because their grandchildren are in the wedding and are coming from South Carolina to PA to be in it and Im sure my aunt and uncle want to be part of all the festivities seeing as otherwise theyd be the ONLY family not at the rehearsal dinner But i actually debated not inviting them for awhile so dont feel guilty for saying that typically it is only for those actively involved in the wedding ceremony

Well that's unfair of them to put you in that situation! Everything leading up to your wedding should have less stress, not adding more unnecessary stress. I would advise that you have your mother/father who is related to your aunt/uncle talk to them. Get a clear view of what she is and isn't expecting. If she is expecting to go to the rehearsal dinner, then let her down easy (or have your mother/father do it). Either way, inviting her and not others will, like you said, bring more trouble.

Yeah once upon a time I think out of town guests use to be invited but people travel from all over these days that the numbers would get out of control. We are doing the bridal party with dates, immediate family, and that's about it.

This is a great question. I am getting married in the Catholic Church.

We are inviting the bridal party plus their dates, both sets of parents, and the two readers and their dates. We are inviting my Grandmother, but she won't be able to come out that late. I think we are at 27 people right now!

I think we are supposed to invite the priest, cantor & Organist, but I don't really know how I should invite them? Do I just tell them that night? *shrug*

So the $*** kinda hit the fan. I spoke with my mom about my concerns, and she spoke with my aunt... who went to my grandparents, and now everyone is upset. My mom has promised me that things will be ok, and everyone just needs some cool down time, but I still fell upset. I had even told my aunt that I would love for her to join us, but maybe have her boyfriend take the kids out that evening.

Out of all of this, I can say that I am very glad to have my mom in my corner. She has been my rock, and told me not to worry. She was very adamant about the fact that I was not in the wrong, and that all my family needed to remember the reason they were there... My and FH's wedding.

Let's hope everything smooths over soon, because my aunt and grandmother are suppose to come to the bridal shower tomorrow.

Keep it small. It's a REHEARSAL DINNER, for those who rehearse and their dates.

Hi everyone, Bride to Be but church musician to boot. I've sung for more weddings than I can remember, and never would expect an invitation to the couples rehearsal dinner. Typically, at least in my corner of the world, the organist and cantor/performers will rehearse separately from the actual rehearsal, to give the wedding party the time and space needed. If you want to invite your musicians, it's a wonderful gesture(!) but don't feel obligated if it's a professional whom you don't share ties.

Sorry, double post!

How am I to convince my future mother in law and future husband that we don't need to invite 107 out of town guests to the rehearsal dinner? We already have a lot of work to do for the wedding. Since it is in my parents backyard. We are also only inviting 160 to the wedding