Rehearsal dinner not at venue..

Will they let you have the rehearsal there for 1/2 an hour? then you would go to a restaurant or somewhere to have the rehearsal dinner. they are probably charging you for the use of the space for dinner.

That is an insane price to be able to have a rehearsal dinner! My venue wasn't going to charge me to actually have the rehearsal, and if i had the dinner it would just be the cost of dinner per person. However, they said if don't use my allotted hour for rehearsal I could tack it on to my reception which I decided to do. I'm having an outdoor wedding so now I am just having the rehearsal in my parents backyard, and having it catered. We are just mainly worried about making sure everyone knows the order and where to stand, which can be done anywhere.

Hi, congrats! We are having our rehearsal dinner at a small Italian rest that is different from our venue. Not a big deal at all. Some brides are having bbqs at their homes. I just tried to keep the driving time under 30 mins. I saved almost $1k having the dinner at another location.

You know what, I was so caught up in everything else I never specifically asked that. Besides the day before and day after for 2,000 the only extra thing we were offered was 2 extra hours before the rental time starts at 10am for a hundred dollars and hour and 2 hours after the end time at midnight for the same price in case clean up should take too long. Luckily we haven't booked it yet so I will definitely email them. You'd think that would be something I would have already asked but this wedding really does mess with your brain haha

FH and I are getting married in a church, so we're going to rehearse there. Our rehearsal dinner will not be at the same place where our reception will be (to be honest, I didn't even know that people have their RD the same place as their reception). In your situation, I don't think it'd be a big deal to practice anywhere you wanted outside. FSIL and her husband got married at the reception venue and practiced elsewhere because there was a wedding the night of their rehearsal, and everything went just fine. Take a deep breath! Everything will work out well for you.

As far as cleanup, it won't be bad cleaning up that night. Anyone that is there at the end of the night might even offer to help you (a bunch of us helped my brother after his wedding, so it only took about 20 mins.). Setting up the morning of the wedding is what's a bigger pain in the butt because you're going to want to take your time getting ready.

@Stacy D I know!! I thought the 3,000 was an insane price because it's one of the pricier ones in the area, and then I learned of the 2,000. Just yikes!!.. That's awesome your venue is letting you do that! We will prob end up doing what you are doing for yours thanks!!

@bina10915- I didn't even think about the driving again for the rehearsal dinner. Our venue is about 40 minutes outside of our hometown so I guess maybe it would be best just to have it at my parents house or maybe a park that way people don't have to drive so far two days in a row!

I am not surprised they are charging so much for what is basically 2 extra days. It is like you are renting the place for 3 straight days. They can't have another event there on Friday night because you would be having your rehearsal dinner. And they can't have another event on Sunday because your stuff is still there. But having said that, I would not pay for those 2 extra days.

I have never actually heard of anyone having their rehearsal dinner at the venue after the rehearsal. The dinner is usually at a different location. Ours will be at a restaurant. And we are cleaning up after the wedding.

@Kelli, same! I've actually never heard of anyone having their actual rehearsal dinner at the venue. They just have the rehearsal on-site, then go to restaurant that's either close to the venue or close to the hotels people are staying at (hopefully they're all close!).

That's what we'll be doing (but going back to a house we're renting, and having dinner catered), and it's always worked great for past weddings I've participated in.

ETA: I would highly recommend doing the rehearsal on-site and not in your parents backyard, though! The rehearsal sounds unnecessary, but I think it really is -- to realize just how long the aisle is, get the spacing just right. If you're going to spend money on the venue, might as well take the time to plan the ceremony for the proper location! But you're saying you don't get any rehearsal time for free? That's crazy! My venue gave us a 4 hour window during which we can do a rehearsal the day before the wedding.

You can certainly do your rehearsal in your parents' backyard, especially if you're getting married outside (just make sure you know the length of the aisle so that you can recreate it at home). Can I make one suggestion? It's just a suggestion...the after-wedding clean-up. If you can squeeze it into your budget, hire a few people to do that for you. The very last thing a bride wants to do is to end her wedding day by bagging garbage, ripping down decorations, and folding up chairs. Every time I read that a bride is doing her own clean-up (usually with guests/volunteers who say they'll help), I think of an old episode of Bridezillas I saw. There sat the bride, in all of her blingy jewelry, professionally styled hair, airbrushed make-up, and white gown, and she was crying. With a garbage bag in her hand, she said she had been all but deserted by all of the volunteers who had promised to help her and her husband clean the site. Most of those volunteers partied at the reception, and they weren't in the mood to clean. Still, she was obligated to get the venue back to its original condition. It's something to think about.

@ The Centered Flowerpieces, that poor bride !! That sounds awful!.. My parents offered to help with the cleanup and round up some friends and family to help but FH family were talking about hiring a small crew for the clean up because they don't want to deal with it either! Either way , we were told by them for us not to worry about it and they will get it all taken care of so we can leave right after it's over!! Hopefully it all goes as planned!!

Our venue is allowing us a 2 hour rehearsal free of charge. They do have catering on site and offered to let us hold the rehearsal dinner there, but we're having it at a local restaurant instead (about 15 minutes away). Did your venue include any rehearsal time in your contract? That seems a little unusual in itself.

For most couples, there is no reason to have a rehearsal. It's walking and standing; all you need is to figure out your order and then have someone responsible to send your party down the aisle. Have a little party in the backyard, and definitely hire a cleanup crew for the day after; no one wants to do that and no one will.

Once you take up a space that could be rented to someone else, you'll pay what they would, and October is one of the business months for weddings, so the extra fee isn't that unusual.

We haven't booked the venue yet so I have not seen a contract. I just got engaged last Saturday so I'm still very new to this. We love everything about the venue, just unsure about how the rehearsal will work.. After reading all the advice I'm going to be emailing her and specifically asking.. When we were there in completely slipped my mind and didn't even think about the rehearsal. Only thing she offered about the day before was to have it in a package deal to have Friday and Sunday for the additional 2,000! I can't believe I didn't think to specifically ask!

Not rehearsing at the venue won't be a big deal. Honestly get everyone together in someones back yard a run through it. Then have a bbq and drink!

Jen Warner, sounds like my kind of night! I like the way you think! Haha

Rehearsal and rehearsal dinner can be at two completely separate places. Most venues will allot a time for rehearsal (hour long block), then everyone goes elsewhere (restaurant, parents' house, etc) for the dinner itself. For clean up, definitely consider cleaning up after the event is over instead of renting the venue for another day (whether you hire people to clean up or it's included in the venue price.)

We aren't doing our dinner/luncheon there. It's at another restaurant. I know a lot of people have it at different places.

Thanks everyone! Makes me feel better knowing that not everyone has their rehearsal the same spot as the wedding!