Registering without being greedy/tacky.

Can you register for upgrades? Towels, bedsheets, etc? You can definitely have a small registry.

Hi wedding date twin, I was told to say in the RSVPS monetary gifts. If you have a big list they are going to buy something regardless, but everyone you know you can mention to or on your website you can state that as well.

Don't listen to Milexy. Nothing on the invites/RSVPs/any stationary should hint at gifts or money. At all.

Surely you could use some new towels, bed sheets, pots, pans? Register for a few nice upgraded pieces and then call it a day. FH and I have lived together for 5 years but there are things we'd love to upgrade to a nicer quality, so that's what we're doing with a small registry.

If you don't want to seem tacky, you do not as for monetary gifts.

DH and were together for 6 years and lived in our house for almost 2 years before we got married. Our regisrty consisted of upgrades (towels, kitchen stuff, linens) and a few fun items (wine fridge, fire pit, etc). 90% of our guests gifted us cash/check at our reception without us having to ask for it. If you want, make a very small registry and your guests will get the hint. But please do not ask for money.

You can register for a few big-ticket upgrades ($500 vacuum, KitchenAid Mixer, etc.) that people can go in on together as a group gift. Things that you want but wouldn't necessarily buy for yourself. Think back to things that you've purchased off of other people's registries.

No, Milexy, asking for money is rude and putting registry info on the wedding invitation is also rude.

So if putting the registry info on the invitation is rude, how do you communicate your registery? I was thinking about making buiness cards into the invitations with that information.

Please keep the help coming I appreciate it. Also I am not having very many young folk in my wedding guest list, so making a website is slightly useless

Make a small registry with things that always need updating (sheets, towels, kitchen towels, etc.). Or don't have a registry. Everyone I know in last ten years or so has gotten 90-100% cash gifts. Adults are perfectly aware that cash is an awesome present and always welcome. If you get 100% picture frames you are thankful because no one has to get you a gift at all. Asking for money in any shape or form is just a gross idea, and will definitely make it clear to guests that you don't know the first thing about being a good host. Red flag city for people receiving those kinds of invites.

Since so many people have wedding websites now, that has become to way to communicate where a couple is registered.

Prior to that, it was more word of mouth, at least in my family. Relatives or friends would ask BMs or the MOB where the bride was registered and info was passed around that way.

Sarah, if someone is hosting a shower for you, the registry info can be put on that invitation. If you have a wedding website you can link the registry on the website and on the wedding invite, just say something like "for more info, please visit our website at xxxxxx.com"

Edit: I saw your comment about your guests not using a website. Just use word of mouth and make sure your registry is acceisble online. I have Googled a couple's name before to see their registry when they don't have a wedding website.

Sarah: registry information can go on your wedding website and/or the shower invitation if someone is throwing you a shower, and spread by word-of-mouth. A handful of people asked my mom where we were registered.

Registry info can be expressed via your website, word of mouth, or in the bridal shower invitation (if someone offers to throw you one).

There's absolutely nothing you need to upgrade? Towels, pots & pans, linens, etc.

Whoever is hosting your bridal can include your registry information on the shower invitation but DO NOT put it on the wedding invitation. If you're really just looking for cash, keep the registry small; you're guests will take the hint.

@Sarah, most people know how to use the internet - it's not just for "young folks". I think you'd be okay putting stuff on a website. But if not, word of mouth is the way to do it.

We also didn't NEED anything, but we made a small-ish registry of upgrades and luxury items (still with a wide range of price points). People will use those for the shower, and most people give cash for a wedding anyway (at least where I live).

Hey OP, DH and I were in the same boat. We registered for small upgrades like everyone else suggested (towels, bed sheets, kitchen utensils, etc). We kept the list small, like 20 items for a 100 person invite list, and most people just gave us money. We did get everything on our list though (hello high thread count wonder sheets!!) and a few surprise items but nothing horribly cumbersome. All in all, a small registry was perfect.

Registering is the time to upgrade or get matching sets of items like PP said. It's also definitely a time to ask for the things you want but would probably not buy yourself. As an example, we have a motion-sensor soap dispenser on ours. It's sounds silly, but when you handle raw chicken, you don't have to touch the soap dispenser! I've been eyeing one for years, but they're $40 and I've been telling myself I can just wash the soap pump. But it would be so nice to have!

Also, we have an Amazon registry, so we added herb pots, upgraded camping chairs, a new tent, and even a kayak! It's a bit unorthodox, but it's all stuff we would love to have and would use together as a couple.

I didn't think I would need anything either and my FH and I live in a small 1/1 apartment and the last thing we can do is store stuff until we buy a house. So I took the advice of others and walked around our apartment and found a few upgrades and I also read all these posts for ideas. Some items I am excited for registering for: cool pillow, sensor trash can, storage bins, steam mop, romba, and a sound bar

I never believe people when they say "we have lived together for a while and have everything we need." I've lived with FH for a while and there are still things we need.

Pots and pans get warped and worn, towels fall apart, pillow cases get lost....

My FH and I will be together for 8 years and out of the 8 living together for 5 years. We still didn't ask for money. We registered for upgrades.

Also, put your registry on your wedding website. It shouldn't be on your invitations.