Reception only guests

Do you have a wedding website? You could always word it on there too! To me, celebratory dinner implies there won't be a ceremony so I would assume you were already married.

Make a second website for reception only guests???

I wouldn’t assume there would be a ceremony with the wording you used, but I would be pretty upset when I realized I was 1 of 7 people in the room who didn’t see you get married.

View Quoted Comment I was thinking this same thing. I understand what "celebration dinner" means but the fact that I'd be 1 out of only 7 people who didn't get to witness would be hurtful.

I agree, add it to your wedding website. If you're talking to any of these people and something is said, correct it, but I wouldn't specifically reach out to them.

Since it's only 7 people I would reach out to them personally and let them know the situation. I would be apologetic and humble and admit that you flubbed but you would still like them there to celebrate after the fact. If everyone knows ahead of time and has a personal conversation with you about it, hopefully feelings will be spared.

Hopefully other brides can read this and learn from it as well

Who are these 7 people and why weren't they invited to the ceremony? I see you said the spot only holds 26 (very random), why wouldn't you choose somewhere to accommodate everyone. Not that it really matters at this point.

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It isn't very random. We are getting married at a national park that has a max count for weddings, since it is an open national park. We cannot have more than 30 people for the event. 26 guests, my photographer, my Fiance and myself, and my officiant. After planning my wedding for 15 1/2 months and going through multiple wedding venues for various dramatic reasons I won't go into now, we decided to keep it small and simple to reduce the stress since we had already spent 15+ months of nothing but stress. So my focus was not on trying to find another expensive spot, probably already booked (because I live in the SF Bay Area) with less than 4 months before the wedding date we chose and chose not to push to avoid having to push our honeymoon. So we made the incredibly difficult decision of having to cut our list. And rather than choosing to keep only 26 guests for the dinner following the ceremony we wanted to invite some additional family to the dinner because they are important to us and we want to celebrate with them.

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I am not sure I understand why anyone would be insulted to be invited to a dinner to celebrate with a bride and groom... what is there to be insulted about being invited to a dinner? Like I am asking you to come hang out with us and I am paying for your meal... I am legitimately confused about what is insulting about that.

Celebration implies that the deed was done, hence the celebration

View Quoted Comment The important part for most people is to watch their loved ones get married. 80% of your guest list for the reception will attend the ceremony. Likely all those people will be talking about your ceremony and those 7 people will feel excluded- because they were.

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Thanks, originally I thought the same thing... that it made sense but then I was doing some reading today and getting concerned that maybe it didn't. I will definitely try and find a way to word it on the wedding website to make it clear and also understandable so people know why some may only have been invited to dinner.

Also etiquette says you can invite people to the receotion only, just not the ceremony only so you are fine

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Okay, I think because we are having such a small and simple ceremony it probably won't be that bad because I guess I don't see that there will be much to talk about. Other than the park itself where we are getting married. But that is something good to think about and perhaps something I can have my closest be aware of to help avoid at dinner. Thanks!

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Only if it's a immediate family ceremony, ie parents, siblings, and grandparents.

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Thank you!

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Instead of asking people not to talk about the ceremony, have a frank discussion about the situation with the guests who might (will probably) feel slighted. Being passive, IMO, is not the way to handle this. Plus, you can't control what others say.

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I agree. I think I would probably want to do both. I will have my Fiance reach out to the handful of guests (since they are his family) so that they understand the situation and don't feel slighted by this. We truly wish we could have everyone, it just isn't our reality. So we will make sure they know that. I am also going to find a way to add that to our wedding website.

View Quoted Comment Yes, if you are having a truly intimate ceremony with immediate family only. Around 10 people are so. It’s extremely rude to invite 80% of your guests to the ceremony but leave out 7 of them. How unimportant would you feel when you found out that you were one out of a group of 7 people not important enough to be invited to the ceremony?

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I'm obviously the minority but I wouldn't put it on your wedding website. I wouldn't want to let all my guests know that I did this...

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Really? I mean.... which is more rude...
1 - have 26 guests at your ceremony and dinner following with open seats at dinner because you had more space available
OR

2 - have a handful of guests at dinner that could not attend the ceremony because of strict park limits?