Reception for people who couldn't make it to the wedding....

This is definetly a pickle. You are not throwing the party so in theory its not your issue who gets invited but won't it be awkward for his family that attended the event to not get invited to the reception your mom wants to throw?

A little background information - more reasons we didnt' find it necessesary to invite EVERYONE:

- second wedding - a lot of these people probably don't even know I'm divorced

- it's on a Sunday night and it's 80+ miles away for my whole family....

- we'd have to sacrifice the venue we both loved....and probably change the entire feel of the wedding.

i was also going to send out "wedding annoucnements" to my family, maybe include a photo or something.

Good point, sami. I'll bring this up to her.

..what should i wear also?

I'm with Sami- it seems like it would be awkward and could create issues to just invite your side and not his.

We cannot invite all of his great Aunts, second cousins, many of our friends, his moms church friends, etc to our main reception- so we are throwing an open house style reception in his home state 2 weeks after our main reception. we are doing it in his "second mom's" backyard and it's only for 2 hours. We are serving cake and punch, people can come and go as they please.

Nice suggestion. I'm thinking since it'd be a 3+ hour drive for his extended family...maybe i should even think of something more in their neck of the woods, too.

Ahhh, i'm still at a loss on how to handle this event. as far as teh guest list goes, i'm set...but little details. do you think people will be "offended" they didn't get invited to my small ceremony that was "out of town?"

i really don't want to hurt anyone's feelings, but i also really didn't want another huge wedding (nor could i afford one).

Ok a little tuff love. Stop worring about everyone elses feelings. Like you have said you have done it once and it wasnt what you wanted. this time around do what you want, how you want it. If you really need to do something extra to easy your mind do the second reception and invite his family and if they cant make it because of the drive then its not on you anymore. you gave them the option and thats all that matters. you cared enough to go out of your way and do something more for the extended family.

Thanks. i think i just needed that. lol

We could not afford to invite all of both sides of our families to our small, intimate wedding. So FH's mom is throwing us a casual bbq reception in his hometown in Ohio and my mom is doing the same in my hometown in Minnesota. This way all of our friends and family can celebrate with us and only the main family members and wedding party has to travel to the actual wedding. I'm kind of unsure of how to dissuade people from buying us gifts for these parties though...I would just feel tacky accepting presents from people not invited to the actual ceremony...

We were sort of in the same position. We are having a destination wedding in Jamaica because that is what FH and I have always wanted, but our families were devastated that they wouldnt make the trip. We compromised and are doing our small 20 person DW, but then are doing a reception pretty much right when we get back from Jamaica. We however invited everyone to both events, are sending only one invitation, and are pretty much having it as if the US recepetion is just our normal reception on hold. It is pretty funny to me actually because my family not making the trip keeps saying "My niece is getting married in October" and I just shake my head since our wedding is in September, but I just laugh it off because to them it is October haha. I think not inviting everyone makes it difficult which is why we invited everyone to both events, are just letting them decide which (if not both) to attend. I would say you know your guests best and just go with what you feel is right.

I talked to my mom. i am going to let her handle everything. she doesn't want it to be formal. i basically todl her when we'd be back from the honeymoon and what days would work best. she doesn't want me to "send invitations" or even word it as a reception. she's just going to call people (or email) and let them know it's happening.

My family and friends are upset with me for getting married in Miami, so I am having a reception here in my town so everyone that can't make it can spend time with us. I felt bad at first but it is my day and I can't please everyone Good luck with your family. In the end everyone understands and they can't be upset with you forever!!