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Mallory
Beginner February 2022

Reception anxiety.

Mallory, on May 21, 2020 at 11:18 PM Posted in Wedding Reception 0 33
I'm having terrible anxiety about the reception. I hate being the center of attention so I really don't want to do a first dance and all of the traditional ceremony things. We have food a DJ for those who want to dance (I'll be staying far away) and corn hole and horse shoes will be set up. I just want to have a good time and enjoy everyone and everything without all the stress of traditional things. Do you think I'm making a mistake? Reception ends at 9 so there isn't a bunch of time that needs to be filled up.

33 Comments

Latest activity by Naikesha, on May 28, 2020 at 5:50 AM
  • H
    Master July 2019
    Hannah ·
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    If you don't want to do the first dance and your fiance is fine with it, there's no law that says you have to.
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  • J
    Master October 2022
    Jana ·
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    If you don't want a first dance, that's totally ok. Just let your dj know so they can open the dance floor for others.
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  • Donna
    Just Said Yes June 2022
    Donna ·
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    I think no first dance is fine. I saw on tv a couple had all married couples come up & dance during the first dance. That idea could take the spot light off of you.
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  • Mallory
    Beginner February 2022
    Mallory ·
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    That's a really great idea.
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  • Michelle
    Expert May 2021
    Michelle ·
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    I think that’s completely fine. I don’t want the a lot of the traditional things either. I just don’t want the first dances, flower toss, cake cutting ect. I am having a Short, non traditional ceremony, dinner drinks dancing. I do have the bar service and DJ scheduled till 10:30. But the reception doesn’t start till 645. I just want to have fun enjoy my people. It should be about what we want anyways right. Does you partner want a first dance with you?

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  • Mallory
    Beginner February 2022
    Mallory ·
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    We just aren't the dancing kind of couple lol. It's not something either of us care about. He's so laid back he just wants to have a drink a play horseshoes with everyone.
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  • Michelle
    Expert May 2021
    Michelle ·
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    Make it exactly what you want. Skip the traditional things. If neither of you care, or want it, why do it. I think it’s great you still have some dancing for your guests, and I love the previous comment, just call everyone out To the dance floor and you sit back and just enjoy!

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  • Mallory
    Beginner February 2022
    Mallory ·
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    Thanks Michelle. I am hoping by providing other things like the photo booth and outside activities that the traditional things won't be missed.
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  • Pirate & 60s Bride
    Legend March 2017
    Pirate & 60s Bride ·
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    Skip anything you want. My hubby & I walked down the aisle together because I didn’t want to go alone, we skipped the tacky garter/bouquet toss, no first dances.
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  • Fiona
    Just Said Yes November 2019
    Fiona ·
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    Completely understandable. You have all the right things set up... with the DJ, Cornhole (things to keep peoples' attention throughout the rehearsal.) Just keep in mind, the people that will be there... they are there to support and celebrate you and your fiance. They are not there to judge you. (I DO understand that SOME can be that way...tell them to GO HOME) This is a celebration and a happy time for both of you. I can tell you, do not stress it. It will ONLY wear you out. The last thing you want is to be exhausted on your wedding day. I went through that. I would change all of that; if I could. I have anxiety as well, so I understand what you are feeling. Keep in mind, though, having a wedding... you WILL be the center of attention. This is supposed to be the time you are able to relax and REVEL in the moment with your soon-to-be spouse.


    But to be appropriate; make sure you try to at least speak to everyone you can. It can be extremely overwhelming....goodness! But just give love and thanks to everyone. You don't have to be a social butterfly. You will be surprised at how quickly time flies during these events.


    Always keep in mind, everyone is there to celebrate your commitment. They REALLY are happy for you.


    (An idea I just thought of... maybe be there, at the rehearsal site BEFORE everyone gets there, to help set up *put little personal touches, etc* so it's not such a "big deal" when you show up to the rehearsal) Just a thought.


    Lots of love and good luck! Enjoy EVERY SINGLE MOMENT.


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  • M
    Master October 2021
    Mrs.a ·
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    I think it’s perfectly fine! If you still want to dance with parents etc I would just make it a point to do so some time during the night
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  • Elizabeth
    Super June 2021
    Elizabeth ·
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    I don't think it matters! If you want to skip it, skip it. We're skipping some of the traditions, too. No one we've told so far has been offended or upset by it.

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  • Cyndy
    Master May 2019
    Cyndy ·
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    It’s your day so do whatever you and your FH want to do and skip anything you aren’t comfortable with. So many weddings now don’t do all of those traditional things anyway so don’t worry about it. The most important thing is that you and your FH have what you want on that day. Good luck!
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  • M
    Legend June 2019
    Melle ·
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    I went to a wedding last year where they actually skipped all of those things! they didn't have any speeches, didn't dance, didn't do any bouquet garter toss. but i do think maybe you should see how your partner thinks of it. for instance if they like the idea of something like a first dance maybe you can meet in the middle and do something really short

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  • Mallory
    Beginner February 2022
    Mallory ·
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    How was it? Did you feel like it was missed? My fiance doesn't care he's happy just drinking and hanging out.
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  • M
    Legend June 2019
    Melle ·
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    I personally thought it went fine i mean people mingled amongst themselves and there was a photobooth. overall i feel as hosts, we think that people will want certain experiences at our events but really, they're there for us.

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  • Gen
    Champion June 2019
    Gen ·
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    You can totally skip it if you want to. I would’ve preferred to skip the first dance honestly but my husband really wanted to do it. After about a minute, we called everyone else to join us on the dance floor so that our time just dancing alone with everyone staring at us was very limited. The only other traditional reception thing we did where everyone’s eyes were on us, was the cake cutting. And that was also pretty quick.
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  • Mallory
    Beginner February 2022
    Mallory ·
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    This is all so helpful and really making me feel much better about not doing so many traditional things. I think I'm coming up with a pretty good plan with everyone's advice.
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  • Kayse
    Expert December 2020
    Kayse ·
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    Not at all. I'm also skipping out on all that traditional stuff.

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  • Mallory
    Beginner February 2022
    Mallory ·
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    Are you replacing it with anything?
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