Rant/feeling depressed about upcoming wedding

Hey, my name is Julia and I took over my sisters account. I am about to get married in one month and I feel super depressed. Nothing is how I wanted it to be. We wanted to have the wedding in summer next year but now we decided we do a courthouse wedding instead. The reason is purely financial. If we get married now we get about 10000 in Tax back plus get health insurance. We really need this money. None of my friends or family will be there, we can not even celebrate because we need to take care of someone sick and can only leave the house for 2 hours a day. Of course I am happy I get married - just not like this. Also I struggle with severe depression and somehow everything feels too much right now. I just keep imagining my parents disappointment that they were not there. This is not meant to offend anybody with a courthouse wedding or people who elope. I just wanted my loved ones with me- no matter were. thanks for listening