Rant

You aren't alone. And yes of course people are going to have it worse, but that doesn't make what you feel and been going through invalid because you don't have it worse. I have been planning my wedding for a whole year now and we had planned to get married in 2 years from when we got engaged. We are supposed to be getting married in August of 2021. Since getting engaged I've had a falling out with my best friend, her true colors came out the day I got engaged. And I'm constantly stuck in the middle between my parents and his parents. And no the parents do hate each other they actually get along pretty well, but his parents and my parents have a way different idea of how they want our wedding to be and bridal shower. Of course we'll do it how we want because it's our wedding and we are paying for it fully, but it's still added stress we don't want or need. And yes I still got a year away but I'm constantly stressed out about the wedding and honestly I sometimes get to the point where I don't even want to have a wedding anymore.

Aww I haven’t experienced this but I hope that things become positive for you and you can enjoy your wedding!

You aren’t alone! My fiancé and I are older in life. We both have watched numerous friends get married and start families. When it’s FINALLY our turn this happens. It’s not fair at all.


You are free to rant and be sad. I know I had a ton of those days. Virtual hugs.

Hi girl, I feel the same way. I actually think of my guests safety, our wedding is in New York in October and we haven't heard any bad news from the venue, but a lot of our loved ones are older and I legit could not sleep one night thinking of ways to keep them safe. An aunt already let us know she is out. I honestly do not want to postpone

View Quoted Comment Yeah I'm always celebrating other people and have more celebrations scheduled. Really want it to happen for us

I absolutely feel you on this, girl. I feel like this year has dealt a lot of really hard blows. My fiancé and I have been in a long-distance relationship for years. I finally decided to take the plunge and move to his state to be with him. I searched and searched and searched for a job there, and ended up landing one that was better than I ever could’ve imagined, and making more money than I have ever made in my entire life! I was so excited, because I knew we were finally going to be able to afford the wedding of our dreams, and I wouldn’t need to rely on my parents for any funding. The interview process took a month (phone interview, then multiple in-person interviews, then intense background checks). Covid had just started to really become a thing at the beginning of my interview process. By the end of it, it had taken a strong hold. Flash forward to one month into the job, and the virus hit where I was working HARD. I have compromised lungs which makes me incredibly vulnerable to severe complications if I were to contract COVID-19. Despite the fact that I had letters from my doctor, pulmonologist, and cardiologist stating it was imperative that I either work from home or get a leave of absence, Work would not grant it since we were considered essential workers (note: I worked in human resources in an office, and all of my duties could have been done from home. Not to mention, I was brand new and hardly knew how to do anything, and was not being trained because they were so short staffed due to so many people being sick). Ultimately, I was forced to quit the job. Now I am stuck quarantining in a tiny town in another state where I don’t know anybody. There are hardly any jobs here at all, so it is extremely unlikely that I will ever find another one as good as the one I had to quit. I am also now without any income, so we are even worse off than before in terms of being able to afford our wedding. I am also now without health insurance, and have some significant health issues that require regular visits to specialists. Several weeks ago, one of my closest friends passed away unexpectedly at the age of 32, leaving behind a husband and small child. I couldn’t even attend a funeral for her because of COVID-19. We have had to reschedule our wedding, and will now have to wait another 16 months to get married. I think 2020 has been very difficult for everyone, and the lingering uncertainty about the virus and what is to come doesn’t help. All we can do is try to focus on and be thankful for what we DO have, and what is going good in our lives, and remember that it could always be so much worse. What helped me was sitting down and thinking about things that I really wanted to accomplish, but never had time to do. I wrote down a list, and I am now working on it during this downtime. So far I have finished my masters degree (which I have been putting off doing for several years), learned to crochet, I wanted to lose weight for the wedding, so I am slowly but surely starting to eat better and I have been trying to take at least one walk every day (I am post hip surgery, so this is pretty much all the exercise my poor legs can handle at this point), I have also started learning how to cook- I am no Betty Crocker by any means, but I’m getting better! LOL I used to love to read, but I’d pretty much abandoned that when I returned to school. So I bought my first book to read for pleasure – I am about halfway through it, and I am loving it! Maybe sit down and think about things that you have wanted to accomplish, and make a list. It doesn’t have to be anything huge- maybe you have wanted to learn how to paint, or play pool, or try a spray tan for the first time.... whatever it is, if it brings you joy put it on the list! I have also made a conscious effort to start every single day with a grateful heart, and list three things that I am grateful for in my life. These are just suggestions that have helped me. Hopefully it’ll help you too! I’m so sorry you, and all of us really, are going through this! There’s always a light at the end of the tunnel though. Hopefully we will all come out stronger on the other end!!

View Quoted Comment I’m the same way you are! I’m hoping in 5 or 10 years this will just be a great story to tell. It sucks now.

I can relate so much to this. It seems 2020 has been a rough year for so many people. Just know, you're not alone! I can definitely agree though - it seems to be just one thing after another. As soon as you think the coast is clear and you can move forward, something else unfortunate happens. I wish you the best and hopefully you find a way to cope with all the stress and everything works out for the better!

Ugghhhh I feel the same! I’ve been waiting over 12 years for this. Why this year!? I feel like nobody around me understands what it’s like. I worked so hard on every detail. I don’t know what to do. Its like even if I go through with it there’s like a dark cloud over everything. And even if we do reschedule who knows what next year will be like! It could be worse! I would like to have something rather than nothing at this point but I also don’t want to cancel on people last minute. So many emotions...

Oh girl I hear your pain and I feel it. I’ve been a bridesmaid 7 times and when itis finally my turn ... I didn’t get a bridal shower or a bachelorette and people’s responses to me have truly set me off. I’m sorry *gives BIG virtual hug*

Girl I feel you! Sending hugs and this is what I had to say about that...
https://www.weddingwire.com/wedding-forums/starting-over/b9876db917e3b17c.html

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I completely understand the parent thing, I honestly think they forget its *our* day and not theres.

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Thank you sending hugs your way as well

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Right? Like I have been through so many weddings and was so excited to get mine. I just feel like if I don't do this now it might never happen ya know?

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Exactly! I have no idea what to do anymore

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Thank you and I'm trying to find productive ways of dealing with the stress rather than moping and doing the stereotypical eating icecream and crying lol

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Yea, my mom is trying to convince me to take as many of my bridals / formals with masks on. But like, hell no. Trust me. I ain't forgetting this circus

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That must be so hard, I am so sorry. Yea, I am trying to do some productive things to deal with my stress (I am determined to make a window bench that my pup can sun bathe on, even tho I have no experience with anything like that) but its definitely easy to get in the slumps

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Treat yourself! Go have a favorite beverage, take a hot bath, eat something yummy!

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Exactly, I just want to experience what I could've if I had followed my MIL suggestion of doing a wedding earlier this year (before COVID was such big thing, in like Feb.)