Rant Time - 31 days out

Yikes! Thats really late to rsvp in general. I am sorry that you are having to redo seating charts and deal with this extra work, on top of not being prioritized. I love the idea of setting the seating chart on fire haha!

I'm sorry that you are dealing with this. my husband and I also both got some "no" RSVPs from important people in our lives (both family and longtime friends) that hurt because we always assumed they would be at our wedding. it's easy to go down the path of thinking "why are their other plans more important than me?" but in the end, we decided that if our family members didn't see us as a priority, then that is on them. I will say that some of the people at our wedding who turned out to be the MOST supportive, the most fun, and the most excited for us were some of the ones we didn't really expect to be. it was a really pleasant surprise when some of our "less close" friends put in a lot of effort to be there on our day. we felt so loved by everyone who attended! just look around at all the wonderful people who ARE there supporting you and forget about the ones who clearly don't care. it's their loss, honestly!

That's not being a bridezilla! That is just part of planning the event. I think everyone goes through calling the forgetful guests.

I made the mistake of not setting a rsvp by date. Ended up having a panic attack WAAAAY early. lol. called everyone within two months of sending out invites to get yes or nos. lol. Im sure i'll hear about it on the day.

I know it hurts and I am sorry that you had a meltdown but honestly forget them. Now you know how important you are to them and I would treat them the same. Your wedding is about you so when you get frustrated just keep that in my mind because do not give others power over your emotions. I wouldn't invite them to any pre wedding events. Can you get money back on the catering and use it towards other things?

I'm going through the exact same thing right now. We invited 132 guests and have 83 attending. I highly believe we will have a bunch of no-shows as well. It is a bit of a shock. A bunch of my uncles and cousins are surprisingly not attending, and most of fiance's family isn't going to be there. It's actually bothering me a bit more than I thought it would. And I felt you when you said that if it was someone else's wedding, they'd be more inclined to go. I truly hear where you're coming from. I feel the same way too. Some family members simply aren't supportive of us, but will be more supportive of other family members. It's a very real thing. It's not always work obligations, being unable to take time off, etc. It can be for other reasons completely unrelated to that. I'm getting married April 4th so.... we just have to hold our heads high and smile and be happy about those who will be in attendance. Your wedding will beautiful, no matter what!!!

LOL

well adulting is hard. I had to keep telling myself that just because it is on my brain 24/7 doesn't mean my aunts and uncles are thinking about it every day.

What frustrated me what that I showed my finished seating plan to my fiance, and he said "I want to invite my boss and a couple more coworkers". Not an issue, but I had been nagging him to do it for several months already. He waited till after I had called everyone and gotten the rsvps, to finally light a fire under his butt. I wanted to shake him I was so frustrated. I still havent gone back and fixed the tables with the additional three people. (he asked more but they canceled).

Right?! his brothers had to nag him to officially ask them to be his best men. I gave up nagging him about it. It kills me that he puts it on the back burner, and caused me total anxiety. I'm the planner in the relationship for sure, but I just don't think men understand timelines for weddings. He's been relatively hands off, I told him he has to plan the honeymoon... but i already know he has yet to book flights. KILLS me!!!!!