Purity ring???

This post keeps reminding me of the chastity belt in the Robin Hood Men in Tights movie where the lock got stuck. Hopefully, I am not the only one who remembers the movie.

@OKD Wait, I have an idea! Call a locksmith!

I have no helpful advice.

^^ Lol

I think it's beautiful that you've done this! I am in the same boat but agree that if it's important for you to do it at the ceremony, just don't put it in the program or mention it overtly. Close family and friends will know what you're doing. I've been to some weddings that did this and since virtually everyone in the audience had similar beliefs (or grew up in a culture that did), it wasn't uncomfortable at all.

That said, we'll be praying at the altar together before the ceremony and he'll be blindfolded (he doesn't want to do a first look). If you do something similar, that seems like a very special place to give him the ring!

Good for you.. but no.

@VM- Baw ha ha ha ha- here- "have a vagina- this one is special though"

@KD- HELL NO!!! you are not the only one LOL- I was pulling up videos of Don Jiovanie just last week (mostly b/c we have a bridge contractor who sounds JUST.LIKE.HIM)

hysterical. Need to watch it again.

Question- once you give the ring to him, what would he do with it? Put it in his pocket? I agree you should leave this out of the program.

Of course you can have scripture read during your ceremony if that's important to you...just as Jewish couples have Jewish prayers and traditions (like the breaking of the glass, the chuppah, the Kidushin, the Ketubah, and the seven blessings) , just as Catholic brides have scripture read at their ceremonies. and just as every other faith or religion includes sacred text at their wedding ceremonies. That has nothing to do with a purity ring..

OKD: "Its an Everlast....." ha ha

First of all, kudos to you and the other virgin brides for your commitment to yourselves, your future spouses, and to your God. Its a difficult thing, to remain abstinent. I tried for years.

I have to agree, its a very private moment...what about presenting it to him on the wedding night? Still have scripture read at the ceremony, but as a guest, I'd feel awkward watching, and as a few have mentioned, it will make the moment SO much more memorable if its just you two...then he also doesn't have to be awkward with the ring either.

This is something extremely personal to you two. I think it would be best for you to have it delivered in a box to your FH the morning of your wedding, along with a note from you. Having it happen at the ceremony is pretty awkward for your guests. Not gonna lie.

I like @Pancakes' idea!

Hahaha VMDizzle, I'm dying.

And yeah, there were a couple threads a while back, right around the time FMM started the Q&A thread I think, where somebody made a comment about wondering how the virgin brides on here fare with sex whenever they post their BAMs. And then a bunch of virgins came out of the woodwork, lol. And every one of them (myself included) was shocked they weren't the only one. It was a really surprisingly friendly and supportive conversation among everyone all along the spectrum of sexual experience.

Then there was a whole discussion about it on one of FMM's Q&A's, which was also amazingly supportive and non-judgmental from all perspectives. But I think it may have been when you were busy with some other stuff and weren't able to be on as much, for a little while there? I'm sad you missed it! Would have been neat to have your voice in the conversation too.

I can't stop laughing at the Robin Hood references. I hadn't thought of that movie for years!!

I'm not sure why it was suggested not to have scripture during your wedding - if you're religious, why wouldn't you have it? As for the ring, I agree with everyone. It will probably be more special if you leave it for just you and your FH before or after the ceremony.

I'm still stumped on the whole purity issue, frankly...... I'm not sold on the idea that this is what God wants (not my business, I know...) but I can't imagine any one of my recent grooms wanting to have something so personal be part of their ceremony.

That being said, I've had couples who won't even use the line from "Union" (robert fulgham) that refers to the couple being 'teachers, lovers, dancing partners" because it's too explicit, and I agree.

@VC - I think the aversion was to use the scripture "and the two shall become one flesh" as part of the exchange of the ring. It is a little too descriptive in that context.

Thank you for the suggestions ladys! Like skme of you have said, most people attending the wedding (if not all) are fully aware of both of us remaining virgins until marriage. For him it is cultural to stay pure, for me it was more of a personal commitment. Everyone is aware and likes to take the time to crack jokes about how our wedding night will be so it's not really an awkward thing among our friends and family. I do like the idea of giving it to him when we exchange rings, it seems like the best time. I will give it to him on a chain and put it around his neck. After the wedding we plan to put it away for our first born daughter (there is a ring for our future son as well haha). It's a personal choice, but most of our family looks at it as something that should be celebrated.

My cousin and her husband did a whole singing thing together letting everyone know they waited for one another. While it's extremely special and nice, the fact that they were telling everyone and literally singing about it was just kinda weird. If anything maybe just put in the program "exchange of purity rings." And also please only do that if he waited for you too, it would just be weird otherwise.

I had a purity ring, but it was from my dad and the promise I made was that I would wait for the one man I married, and he promised he would always be faithful to my mom (his wife). So since there were two promises there, I felt I should give it back to him. I thought about doing it during the ceremony, but as others have commented, I couldn't think of a time when it would fit in and not be awkward. So I gave it to him that morning when we had breakfast together along with a note that said something along the lines of "I kept my promise and am thankful to have the reassurance of your commitment to Mom" or something. It was very meaningful to him.

@wildflower, that sounds so beautiful! I love that you involved your dad. I feel that because your father gave it to you it made it a special moment between the two of you, and that's really great. Mine was issued by the church, in front of the whole church, after I took a class and then upgraded by my parents to a diamond ring after I made it to 21 years of age.

@MrsBest2b, I agree and he did wait for me too haha. I would never do this if he hadn't, because it would be extremely awkward for other people who knew haha.

@FutureMrsXavier2326

If you want to keep it low key you could just have him take your purity ring off in order to put your wedding band on.

If you want to incorporate something in your ceremony and program I would call it a "Purity Ceremony" or "Exchange of Purity Rings" rather than a "Gifting of Purity" (no offense that makes it sound like you're going to have sex at the altar).

You could use any scripture that speaks to you. Examples I could see being used: "Be an example to all believers in what you say, in the way you live, in your love, your faith, and your purity" (1 Timothy 4:12) or "We prove ourselves by our purity, our understanding, our patience, our kindness, by the Holy Spirit within us, and by our sincere love." (2 Corinthians 6:6).

I also found a script of a purity ceremony relating back to the True Love Waits pledge that you could edit and incorporate into your wedding ceremony if you like:

"Several years ago __________________ and ________________ (unbeknownst to each other) took a True Love Waits pledge of abstinence until marriage. From that time until now they have remained pure while waiting for God’s will for their lives.

To _______________________ and ____________________-we say that today is the culmination of many hopes and dreams that you have had for many years. We are very proud of you and the stance that you have taken!

When __________________ and ______________________ made the pledge, they started wearing purity rings that served as a reminder of their vow to live a life of both physical and spiritual purity. Because you have pledged to keep yourselves only for each other, today will serve as a springboard for a secure relationship that will carry you through many challenges and opportunities.

______________________ and ______________________ now stand before us as living examples that True Love Waits. In a world that seems to live for instant gratification, we have a couple who prioritized God’s ways and now will enjoy the blessing within their marriage relationship.

May I also challenge both of you from this day forward to remain first of all pure in your walk with the Lord Jesus; and secondly, to remain pure in your love relationship with each other.

______________________ and ______________________ take your purity rings and present them to each other, symbolic to all present that you loved and respected each other enough to wait for God’s best and each other.

Now, take them and put them in a secure place. Someday should God bless you with children of your own, take these rings and present them to your children while explaining their significance. You’ll be passing along a legacy and a family heritage of purity to the next generation, spreading the message that True Love Waits."