Private Picnic for Groom & Bride?

If you were having a cocktail hour, I think this would work fine because guests don’t usually expect the couple to attend cocktail hour. Without the cocktail hour though, I’d find it odd that the couple isn’t coming into the reception right away.

View Quoted Comment I understand you’ll be putting on your wedding website that guests should eat before attending. I will caution you though, the majority of guests do not even look at wedding websites. So if I were you, I would also include this information on an insert card with your invitations. You want to make it extremely clear that you will not be serving a meal, because having a wedding at 6:30 PM would generally indicate to guests that dinner will be served. Also, if you think about the logistics of it…. Your ceremony begins at 6:30 PM, which means people will be leaving their houses by 6:00 PM (assuming your venue is within 15 minutes of everyone’s home). That means they will begin getting ready at 5:00 PM. Which means you are requiring them to eat dinner around 4:00pm. Considering most people eat meals every 4-5 hours, that means your guests are going to be quite hungry around 8-8:30pm. And I don’t know about you, but cake and pie is not going to work for me. Sugar on an empty stomach would make me sick. Plus eating sugar late at night isn’t good for you (and definitely not recommended for children!). Add to that the fact that you want your guests to drink and dance- people will need substantial food to counterbalance the alcohol and physical activity. Wedding etiquette states that if you are not serving a full meal, your wedding should begin no earlier than 8:00 PM.


Here are some articles about navigating a wedding without a meal that you may find helpful
https://www.brides.com/story/non-seated-dinner-wedding-planning-advice


https://www.theknot.com/content/do-i-have-to-serve-a-full-meal

View Quoted Comment As the first sentence in the comment you replied to said. It will be on our invitation. I will consider starting at 7, as that is the latest we can go with our children being so young. Guest won’t be on an empty stomach, as they will have eaten beforehand! And if they neglect to do so, again, not my fault in the slightest. I’ve read many articles and taken all of the information into consideration, as well as the needs of my family and friends. Luckily, guests have the option to RSVP no if anything I decided upon for my wedding won’t for them. Thanks for your concern

View Quoted Comment Thank you for the input! Leaning away from doing it at this point 😊

View Quoted Comment Thanks for the response! 😊

View Quoted Comment You’re welcome 😊 That’s what this forum is for… sharing tips and insights on how to properly navigate hosting and create an amazing wedding experience for couples and their guests.

View Quoted Comment Yes except that you actually chose to address a topic, which was not even the discussion at hand and your opinion was not asked for on. Not to mention that you did so in a presumptuous, snarky, and passive-aggressive way. Maybe try a little kindness and understanding for difficult situations and decisions next time 😊

View Quoted Comment Cece is one of the kindest, most considerate and helpful posters on this forum. Snarky and passive aggressive are the last words anyone should use to describe her.
When you ask a question on a forum, you don’t get to dictate how people reply. People reply holistically to the information given and offer advice on the entire situation. The fact that you’re not feeding your guests (charcuterie and pie are not heavy evening snacks) during dinner time IS relevant to your question about wanting to sneak off for private time, and her replies and advice reflected that.

View Quoted Comment Wow. Presumptuous, snarky and passive aggressive? None of those things were my intentions. I was simply trying to point out potential caveats in the planning details that you had shared. Sometimes when people are new to wedding planning, they are not always aware of the etiquette pertaining to properly hosting guests. I certainly wasn’t! And I found other peoples’ comments, suggestions, tips, corrections, etc. incredibly helpful in ensuring I was creating a great experience for us and our guests. You will find on this forum, if you are doing something that is considered rude or improperly hosting, people are going to point it out (because hey, you may not be aware) and try to help you come up with feasible solutions. Everyone tends to give the benefit of the doubt that everyone here is trying to be mindful of proper etiquette and properly host their guests, and we make suggestions based on that assumption.

View Quoted Comment Thank you Kylie, your kind words are incredibly appreciated 💕 It was certainly never my intention to offend OP with the information I provided.

View Quoted Comment I agree with this completely. I did not interpret any of Cece's replies as snarky. She was genuinely trying to highlight some concerns with your plan, and bring up potential outcomes from those concerns. Her advice was relevant to your original question. I agree completely that the food you plan to serve doesn't seem adequate for an evening of drinking and dancing, and people may leave early because of it. Plus, there may be guests who either forget that they were supposed to eat beforehand, or overlooked it on your invitations (not everyone reads the whole thing, some people just look for date/time/place). And like Cece pointed out, people will need to eat at 4 in order to be at your wedding on time, and they will be hungry by 8 or 8:30, regardless of whether they ate beforehand or not. By taking any time apart from your guests, you risk not interacting with those who choose to leave early to go get food. This could be resolved by serving an actual meal instead of a charcuterie board. There are many options for a cheaper meal to help with budget.

View Quoted Comment Thank you for understanding my intentions Lisa! 💕

I love this idea!!!

View Quoted Comment

Pot, meet kettle. Your post followed by the smiley face is the definition of passive aggressive.

FWIW, I agree that you're having your event at prime dinner time. Usually, cocktail receptions start later than 8 pm.