Private Ceremony vs the Bridal Shower

I think that if you make it clear that the ceremony is only for close family you will be fine... then invite them to the reception. The only thing that would be unacceptable is to invite someone to the shower but not have them invited to anything else wedding-related (reception or ceremony)

I think as long as they are invited to either the ceremony or the reception it is fine to invite them to the shower.

The guests that are not included in the ceremony are invited to the reception. I will not just invite a guest to the bridal shower only.

I have to agree with Bufton. I know you want to make sure everyone is included. But as a guest I would not be happy to be invited to the shower but not the actual wedding. I'm sure most people will understand why they are not invited.

Bufton, would it be possible for the "overflow" guests to be on the ground instead of in the treehouse? With a sound system, they would at least be able to hear the wedding, even if they can't see you.

No, the Tree is forty feet in the air I don't think that would work, or fair to have first or second rate seating.

You'r getting married in a tree house? wow-that has to be first. cool!

That is pretty neat.

I don't think it's rude. You could videotape the ceremony and play it at the reception and loop it or whatever.

If they don't want to attend the shower, that should be fine.

Most ladies I know with family and kids will not attend a shower these days. But that is just my crowd unfortunately.

Yes, JJ is right. You could hire a professional photographer that offers the services to video records your ceremony and show it raw with or little editing if you prefer. However, if your wedding is in the morning and the reception few hours later it can be done. Another option is to photograph the wedding and have the photographer show all the photographs in a slide show with some soft music playing on the background so that all the guess can enjoy it.

Yes, we are going to have still photos at the reception from the ceremony. We are nature people and the treehouse fits us very well. A video is a great idea, but not in our budget, but that does not stop us from setting up a tripod. Thanks

The universally accessible treehouse at the nature center is to expand opportunities for people with disabilities to enjoy the outdoors. It is the only one is Michigan and very few are throughtout the United States. Within the week they started being able to host weddings, I'm super excited.

A Link to the treehouse pics:

http://www.sccresa.org/countyeducation/resaserviceseducation/pinerivernaturecenter/treehouse/

Ok I just want to say that treehouse looks AWESOME.

That is really cool, and from what I've heard elsewhere, it's not unusual for some people to be invited to only the reception and not the ceremony--it's just not good taste to do it the other way around.

I think that is so neat. I am having a private ceremony but an open Reception. I am telling everyone we only want family at the ceremony.

I think if you tell them that it is private, they should understand.

Fabulous location!

What a totally cool location for a wedding!!

I've been in situations where I was not invited to the wedding ceremony, but warmly invited to the reception. People do that for a variety of reasons. (In one instance it was because the entire ceremony was spoken in Vietnamese, which I wouldn't understand, and I organized that bride's shower) Have your shower, have the hostess(es) invite who you want, and don't give it another thought. Those who want to throw a snit and not attend the shower, won't. Those who understand and are willing to share in your joy anyway, will attend.

Dear Bufton, treehouse looks AWESOME.

Thanks for all the input.

We have 200 guests and only 25-30 of them are being invited to the ceremony- just immediate family and my goddaughters parents. So we will also be inviting people to the bridal shower who aren't invited to the actual wedding ceremony. I'm with those who said that as long as you make it clear that only immediate family is invited to the ceremony- so as not to make people feel alienated- then you should be alright. If people choose not to come to the shower because of that then that is their problem, not mine.