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Dedicated July 2021

Preferred Vendor Pressure

MaryElena, on December 15, 2019 at 8:17 PM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 12
Hi everyone!
We have finally found our DJ, it’s relieving but simultaneously I felt so horrible when I graciously declined an offer from the DJ that came highly recommended by our event specialist. After our consultation this past week, I received numerous texts about whether or not we would put a deposit down. We felt pressured to make a quick decision. Their quality was exceptional but came with a hefty price tag. We negotiated the pricing with them once or twice and the final number we were given for even a basic package would’ve been $2,600 with a $1,000 deposit. Ultimately, we have booked an entertainment company who has competitive quality and the final cost for the basic package was only $1,800 with a $400 deposit. Once FH and I had mutually decided that this alternative was most cost effective, I contacted the other DJ and sincerely thanked him for his time, politely declined the offer, and told him my fiancé and I would definitely keep him in mind for other occasions. In his reply he wanted to know why we chose a different vendor and told us he was more than willing to accommodate our financial needs. Sending this message made me feel like such a mean person. My fiancé took a few hours to reassure me that I handled the situation admirably. Nevertheless, I still feel like a did an unforgivable thing.
Was there a better way to handle this situation? Thanks for your support!

12 Comments

Latest activity by Sarahphillips, on December 17, 2019 at 9:35 PM
  • V
    Rockstar July 2019
    Veronica ·
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    I think your fiance is right and that you handled it fine. I talked to several DJs including ones our venue recommended and ones I just found on my own. Vendors obviously know they might not get you as a client as that is just a part of the business.
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  • M
    Dedicated July 2021
    MaryElena ·
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    Thank you for the reassurance! I can’t help but feel like I hurt his feelings. I believe he was under the impression that we would instantly lock in our date because his company was a preferred vendor. He seemed disappointed with us. His response made me feel so foolish. 😟
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  • V
    Rockstar July 2019
    Veronica ·
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    We fired our officiant who was a preferred vendor because one of my bridesmaids is a Jehovah's Witness and our officiant was a pastor so we decided to go with someone else.
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  • Kelsi
    Expert June 2020
    Kelsi ·
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    There wasn’t a better way to handle it. You made the right choice for you and their pushy nature didn’t help.
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  • M
    Dedicated July 2021
    MaryElena ·
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    Really appreciate the encouragement! The reply I received from the vendor was a bit crass. Never have I dealt with a vendor who asked us why we chose an alternative. In some way, my fiancé says he believes it was an attempt to guilt trip us. Will our decline cause them to think twice about working with us in the future for any other occasions?
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  • Kelsi
    Expert June 2020
    Kelsi ·
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    It may, but are you truly likely to deal with them again? If you didn’t like them in this situation, their behavior is unlikely to change so why use them?
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  • Sharon
    Super September 2021
    Sharon ·
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    You have every right to go with vendors that you choose and do not owe anyone an explanation for it. Just because they're your venues preferred vendor doesnt mean its right for you. You didn't hurt his feelings, you hit him in his wallet. It's very unprofessional for him to make you feel guilty for not booking them. Sounds like you dodged a bullet with him. Don't give it a second thought.
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  • Taylor
    VIP October 2020
    Taylor ·
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    You handled it completely fine! Every wedding has a different budget and vendors know that. I really don't think they take it personally at all. Many people don't even follow up to tell them that they decided to go a different way so I'd say you even went a step further than most. Don't stressSmiley smile

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  • Jennifer
    VIP August 2021
    Jennifer ·
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    He's trying to guilt trip you into going with them. You clearly made the right choice!

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  • M
    Dedicated July 2021
    MaryElena ·
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    Thank you for the encouragement! I’m always ready and willing to give others the benefit of the doubt. The pressure we felt made it harder for us to decide. Within hours of consultation, they were eager to hear back from us. Very personable staff but I didn’t have the heart to cause any disappointment. I was even afraid our event specialist would be upset. We felt guilty for not signing with the preferred vendor especially since our venue recommended only top-notch professionals. Ultimately, we needed to choose another vendor who would strictly adhere to our financial situation.
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  • Jennifer
    VIP August 2021
    Jennifer ·
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    Of course! Some vendors are great, but ultimately you have to go with your gut and your budget! Smiley smile

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  • Sarahphillips
    Dedicated June 2021
    Sarahphillips ·
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    Haha this reminds me of a story my FH dealt with when he was a wedding DJ. One of his competitors messaged a couple asking if it were a financial issue and that he would work with them on it. The bride replied that they liked my FH’s personality more because it meshed better with theirs 😂.
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