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Beginner April 2014

pre-destination wedding etiquette

June, on July 8, 2013 at 4:11 PM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 5

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I am having a destination wedding. I know many friends of mine will not be able to attend due to time and expense. Should I still have a bacherlerette and invite those ladies, regardless of whether they're attending? Should my MOH host a bridal shower (perhaps gift-free?), inviting those whom will be putting up the expense and time to travel as well those who will not? I appreciate immensely those who will be attending the wedding, and I do not want to have them spend more money than they already have to. However, apart of me would like to have the pre-wedding festivities I've been subject to attending to in the past.

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5 Comments

Latest activity by Zoe , on July 9, 2013 at 10:03 PM

Super September 2015
Love113 · on July 9, 2013 at 5:09 PM
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I am also having a destination wedding! I think you should still have a bridal party, that you plan to invite. You just have to understand if they decline. I'd still treat everything like a traditional wedding and only invite those to the festivities that you are inviting to the DW.
I am willing to buy the bridesmaids/MOH dresses for the wedding if they attend & same goes for the groomsmen with their outfits if they attend. Just a thought!
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Master July 2012
Jessica · on July 9, 2013 at 5:22 PM
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I think "officially" etiquette says that you don't invite anyone to a shower or party who isn't coming to the wedding.... I think that's BS if that is kind of the only chance those folks will have to celebrate with you.

As long as it doesn't look gift-grabby then I think you should totally find a way to celebrate with the people who won't be able to be there. Instead of a shower or a bachelorette party you could always do something that is more couple oriented.. if you don't make it a "shower" you can probably still celebrate and make it obvious that you're skipping the gifts.
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Expert October 2013
Alycia · on July 9, 2013 at 6:02 PM
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If anyone wants to trow you a shower or bachelorette party go for it! You shouldn't throw yourself either- that's what look very gift grabby. Te only people invited to the shower need to also be invite to the wedding. They don't have to atten the wedding though. You can receive gifts as well, given those rules are followed, without looking gift grabby. Some may jut send you gifts regardless and that's okay too
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Devoted August 2012
Ashlee · on July 9, 2013 at 6:07 PM
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I had a destination wedding and we did everything the same as you would do one a home. Only invited people to the shower/bachelorette that we invited to the wedding - we didn't base things on wether or not people could actually attend the wedding. This way everyone felt included in the prewedding activities even if they weren't able to make it to the wedding. As for the bridal party, we did pay for the dresses & tuxes for them since they made the trip for the wedding.
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Master May 2012
Zoe · on July 9, 2013 at 10:03 PM
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I don't think it's 'coming' I think it's 'invited to'. So, if you invited these people, but they're unable to come, you can still invite them to your shower.
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