Potluck wedding reception

I was invited to a wedding for a family member of FH. I told her I couldn't get the day off from work. She replied with "well you still owe me a dish because there are a lot of people who found my wedding important enough to get the day off". I don't speak to this family member. Potlucks are rude. Do not force guests to cook.

Here we go again....

@helena, It's morning and it made it! Way to start the morning thread browsing.

OP....no. If I was asked to bring a dish to pass to a wedding I probably would not be coming to said wedding. Not even gonna lie.

Weddings cost money. If you want a wedding you have to spend some.

I am going to one later this month and I am dreading it. I am not planning on stay at the reception very long.

Why would you want people to feel this way about your wedding? Don't do it. Have your reception at a restaurant or at a non meal time. Please don't make your guests stress about this.

I've been to two potluck weddings. One was terrible and I only went because I was in the WP, and one was a cake and punch public park reception that was beautiful, but put a lot of stress on the families who cooked all day. I left both of them hungry. Don't do this to your guests.

Don't do this. Hire a professional caterer with insurance so that you are not held accountable if anyone gets sick. Don't make your family work on your wedding day, they should be celebrating with you. Don't ask your guests to bring their own food to your wedding, a guest should be hosted, not put to work.

I have contacted E. coli from eating fruit at a potluck event, as well as other food poisonings at another event. I have cut into a chocolate cake at a potluck event that my next door neighbor backed only to have a mouthful of cat hair, because she always let her cats walk all over her counter with their long shedding hair and filthy, fecal mattered feet.

Potluck food is never handled properly and easily gets contaminated. People rarely have appropriately sanitized kitchens to prepare food; and rarely do people wash their hands, food looses its temperature as it's being transported, and food is left out either at room temperature for a long time or out in the sun if the wedding is outside.

If you cannot afford to properly feed your guests with an experienced, licensed caterer, then you cannot afford your wedding. If you do potluck, you are putting your guests health and safety at risk, and if anyone gets sick at your wedding, you are responsible for their medical bills. DO NOT do a potluck or self catering.

I have to agree with everyone it's very rude and I personally hate potlucks.

Please don't do this . It could end very bad .

You could just charge the guests for their meals?

Potlucks are okay in small groups for family gatherings. Not for weddings. I would expect a lot of declines when people find out that it's potluck, or for them to leave after the first dance/cake cutting. It's really best to hire a pro and if you're looking to cut costs, cut your guest list.

Oh puhleez NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Don't listen to FutureMrsWhite!

Your wedding is over a year away. Pick up more hours at work or get a part time and save the money towards food.

No, just at terrible idea for all the reasons the PPs said. I agree with A&L extra shifts or a second job.

If you can't afford catered food, you can't afford your wedding.

Reception at a meal time? Then you serve a meal (I'll be honest...any time before 10pm is a meal time to me so....)

Really can't afford it? Either wait a year to save up or do cake and punch only reception at 2pm. No one will stay past 2 hours though.

If I see I have to make a dish to attend a wedding, I'm not going.

It isn't low cost. You are making your guests cover the costs.

No. There may be times when a potluck is appropriate. Maybe. But a wedding is never ever one of those times. Be a good host. Don't make your guests do the work a professional should be doing because you're cheap, because all a potluck wedding says is "I just want your gift, I don't care about you or your comfort at this major life event I'm hosting"

I have seen people not bring gifts to weddings that are pot luck assuming the gift is the dish they bring.

It's not a great idea.