polite way to ask for money/giftcards instead of items

There is no polite way to ask for money or for that matter any gift. The easiest way to let people know that you want money instead of gifts is to have it spread by word of mouth, and to create a small registry, or nonexistent registry (although then people are likely to get you gifts that you don't want and that you can't return).

This is a hot topic because it really is impolite to specify a gift, especially cash.

Unfortunately, no, there's no tactful way to ask for cash. Not registering for gifts is an excellent non-verbal way of telling your guests your preference though.

What CeCe said^^

I haven't been here that long but I've seen MUCH debate with this topic.

Well I agree with you ladies. I do like the idea of a small registry and word or mouth. Thank you!

There are a million posts on this if you want to search and read through them.

That being said, no there is no polite way to ask.

Why not register for the things that you will use the gift cards for that you say you "need"?

You can say " as we have everything we need Monterey gifts or gifts cards are greatly appreciated"

Warning: You have opened a can of worms by bringing this topic up. There are a lot of opinions on the topic if you use the search tool.

The people that want to give you cash are going to regardless of if you ask for it. Those that want to give you a gift will probably ignore your request anyway thinking you will want at least one thing to open. If you make a small registry those that want to do gifts can those who want to give money will and those that are unsure will see everything you wanted you got already so they will give what they know is always appreciated.

I'd suggest registering somewhere that allows you to return items for cash. Register for items that you'd like or do need (or might need). Then any items you do get will most likely be ones you'd like, or you can return them for money.

Put the things you mentioned you need on your registry.

I don't think there is a polite way to tell your guests to give you cash. Like the other brides said, no registry. But remember, no registry can be interpreted that you don't want any gifts of any kind. Wedding guests are invited to share in our wedding day & celebrate that you are marrying the love of your life. Gifts nor cash should be expected, just appreciated if given.

A word of warning about not registering you are opening the door to people deciding what to get you! So someone may decide that you need a dalek cookie jar because for some strange reason they think you are a Dr Who fan. Or to someone deciding that because the second hand van you bought had a hello kitty bumper sticker that you need a Hello Kitty shower curtain for your second floor bathroom.

And just because you register at place XYZ that you think will let you return the gifts for cash that does not mean that your guests will necessarily buy from place XYZ. My MIL is notorious for printing out peoples registries at Macy's and with her discounts, coupons etc buying the items for half price or even less at Kohls. (She bought our Kitchen Aid that way and paid $199 for the same model Macy's had for $399)

So do yourself a big favor register for some things and tell your family and bridesmaids that you would actually prefer gift cards to store A.

Oh man... now I totally want to find a Dalek cookie jar to put on our Amazon registry. FH would hate that but it would be the coolest.

I cant remember where I saw the Dalek cookie jar, but I wish someone had bought one for us (and we would have loved it). I want the coffee cup that when you pour hot liquid in it the tardis disappears and then reappears as you drink.

And here's your Dalek cookie jar:

http://www.amazon.com/Dalek-Cookie-Jar-TVs-Who/sim/B000CBCLQS/2

Make a small registry and then have your family spread via word of mouth that you are saving up for a house or whatever it is. Usually the younger generations get it and will give cash its the older ones who sometimes just want to give a real gift.

That seems to be working for us thus far. Also a small registry will come in handy if someone hosts you a bridal shower! Mine has maybe 30 items on it, most of which have been purchased for my shower this upcoming Saturday.

No, no polite way..just register for the things you think you'd get with gift cards..if you have a small registry people will get the hint.

My sister n law put "Gift Cards preferred" on her invites because everyone already knew her and my brother n law were living together and di not need anything. We didnt care and it was honestly easier to just get her that anyways!

I ended up returning a lot of the items from my registery once I figured out I didn't need them. They will give you a gift card or cash back. I would just do it that way and not offend anyone.

You should use the search function for this question. We're always here to help but this topic just opens a GIANT can of worms.