Plus ones getting of control!

Any other brides feel like their own families are taking advantage with added plus ones? We’re now at 4-5 FAMILY members who are adding plus ones! Not friends, family.

Our rule was to not invite a plus one unless they’re a long term relationship (ideally the length of our 2 year engagement) or we have met them prior to the wedding.

We specifically wrote names on the invites and our family seems to not care at all. We’re 2 months away with 2 weeks left to RSVP, we’re over budget and it’s getting out of control.

The first cousin asked to bring “his girl” who not only hasn’t met us but hasn’t met any member of the family because “she’s nervous” around new people. Not sure how inviting her to my 200+ person wedding is the best introduction over Sunday dinner but whatever.

The second wrote in her plus one without speaking to us directly. She went to her mom, who went to my FH’s grandmother, who went to my FMIL who went to my FH saying she approved it. We didn’t actually approve it, it was approved by the family for us because my FMIL said she would pay for them. But it’s the principle.

The third is my aunt who had a despicable divorce, responded alone (as invited) and is now bringing up some BF we’ve never heard of. But if we grant her yes, she would like us to not tell anyone she’s bringing someone, including my mom (her sister). I kinda think my mom is going to figure it out and I’d like to not have it come out on our wedding night.

Now my other cousin wants to bring her “friend”, that’s it. A friend just because or at least how she described.

And on top of that, my other cousins wife asked if she can bring her 2 week old (based on her due date) even though we clearly have a no kid rule. She’d get a sitter for the 2 boys but bring the baby.

Am I freaking out for no reason or are our families out of control and taking advantage? Is it normal to have your guest list forced to increase by requests that make you feel guilty for saying no? I wasn’t stressed for much of the process but I’m losing my mind over here. Ladies what are your thoughts?