Plus Ones for Single People?

It’s really up to you. I probably would not since the guest list is small. Do the single people have friends or other people they’ll know at the wedding?

If these are people you know well and who already know others in attendance at your wedding then I would say no +1. If someone starts seriously dating after the invites have gone out, they can reach out to you then and ask if there is room for their SO. Are you open to extending an extra invitation closer to your RSVP date if one of them asks for it?

We are giving all single people a plus one. It was important for us that all our guests feel comfortable and have a great time, which means we did not want anyone to forcibly be there without a date, if they wanted to bring one. Not only is it good hosting and gracious to your guests, it also prevents the situation you spoke of (a guest dating someone new between invitations been sent and the wedding)

View Quoted Comment The single people will be family members (cousins) so they will know almost everyone.

Invites should be sent out 4 to 6 weeks beforehand, not sure how a single person can jump into a serious relationship in that time. I doubt 100% of your guests will attend, so you should have wiggle room either way

For our 65ish person wedding, we're giving plus ones to anyone who is truly single and has to travel or doesn't know anyone at the wedding. No plus ones to people who are single and are friends with other guests. If by the time invitations need to go out they had a new SO, we'd invite them by name on the invitation as opposed to giving a blank plus one.

View Quoted Comment In that case I don’t think it’s necessary! Especially cousins.

I didn't due to COVID to keep households and social bubbles consistent. I gave them to some (single friends who are traveling and a couple of my parents' friends who wouldn't know anyone else) but I didn't for cousins or friends that I know are local and aren't seeing anyone.

I absolutely despise random plus ones. I'm all for including significant others, but why should a couple spend a lot of money hosting someone they have never met and who has no special value to one of their invited guests? I've gone to at least half a dozen weddings or more solo, often when I didn't know any other guests, and I always enjoyed myself. I only ever went to one wedding with a random date because the groom (who was literally the only person I knew at the wedding, save his parents I briefly met once, insisted after I RSVP'd for just myself). I've never considered it fair to bring some random person as a date to one of the most important and meaningful days in my dear friends lives. Weddings are expensive and I never wanted to burden the couple with that additional cost and strangers in their wedding photos.

Our guest list is similar size (76 people) and we only included a plus one for one family member who we knew wouldn't actually bring a date but would be offended (and likely cause drama) if we didn't give them the option. If we gave all the singles plus ones, we would have increased our guest list by more than 10% and along with the SOs of close friends who we've met briefly maybe a few times at most, we didn't really want a quarter to a third of our guest list to be people we weren't close to.

My rule of thumb is anyone who is in a serious committed relationship at the time your Save the Dates go out (usually 6 months before the wedding, 4 months before invites go out) gets invited along with their significant other. If someone ends up in a relationship after that period of time, its still a pretty short relationship and I would include the SO on a case by case basis (if a close friend met someone a month after we sent out STDs and we hung out with them and their new boo a bunch of times before the invites went out, I would likely add them in). By the time invitations go out, its pretty close to the wedding itself so if someone isn't attached then but starts dating someone right after, I'm not considering a relationship less than two months old serious enough to adjust my guest list for.

Make sure you have a little space in case people get into relationships (we had 2 of those...then again we had another someone break up in the meantime !). Both of these couples are now married so I’m glad we had space for them !


We gave plus ones ONLY to the single guests that didn’t really know anyone else, and we encouraged them to use it. This really was only 2 people . Both brought a guest and I think both had a much better time considering they had someone there to keep them company. Any single people who had lots of friends there or lots of family there did not get a random plus one. This worked out just fine

I'll also point out that if you allow someone to bring a plus one, their plus one will likely know no one else there and will not know you either, so unless they are super outgoing they can tend to become super reliant on your invited guest to show them a good time, and then your invited guest doesn't mingle/interact as much with you or your other guests. Also you run the risk of someone bringing a date they don't know all that well and some drama unfolding when someone's Tinder match turns out to be a lot less fun for a 6 hour wedding than they were for a half hour coffee date.

There are absolutely some situations in which a plus one is warranted, but they are few and far in between, in my opinion. If you have someone invited who knows absolutely no one else at your wedding and everyone else is coupled off, definitely give them a plus one. No one wants to be the only single, solo person surrounded by a bunch of couples at a love fest. I also think it makes sense if you have a guest or two that is an odd person out and is unlikely to have a whole lot in common with your other guests.

I've gone to at least 3 weddings solo where I knew absolutely no one save for the couple, and at least another 3-4 where I had met a couple other guests maybe once or twice before, but in all of those cases there were other people invited who I had stuff in common with and the couple just made a point to introduce me to those people right away (and sit me at tables with those people). I ended up making "friends" pretty quickly and had people to chat with and dance with all night. The one and only wedding I ever had trouble connecting with other guests was the one wedding where the groom insisted I bring a plus one because "the wedding is huge and its mostly her family and you probably won't have much fun if you don't bring someone."

In the case of your single cousins, who know each other, I don't think a plus one is necessary.

It gets really expensive to add plus ones for everyone, so I would say it depends on your budget. For my wedding we are including plus ones for people that we know are in a serious relationship only. If they happen to get into a relationship after we send invites, how serious could it be? I don’t think your friends will be expecting plus ones if they are single. And maybe they will mingle and meet someone at your reception!

Definitely not worth it to have random plus ones at your wedding!

My dad got re-married when I was 10 and has been giving me a lot of advice but the thing that has stuck with me through the guest list process is "Will you be glad they are in your wedding album?". Unfortunately for him MOST of the people in his album he is no longer friends with. That being said the way I've determined who gets a "plus one" of my non-married guests is 1) I have met them on multiple occasions OR 2) they will have been together for approx. 1 year at the time of my wedding (9/18/21!).

I was in your shoes not too long ago. I was very anti +1. We didn’t even give +1s to our bridal party. Now that we are receiving responses back, we are giving +1s out after declines come back. I think this was very strategic on our end bc we initially invited as many people as our venue could hold. I started to allow dates or even friends when I knew I had wiggle room and spaces to give. Use it to your advantage

View Quoted Comment I agree I made sure all the single people had plus ones. I want to make sure as a host my guest are comfortable and have a good time, if that means they bring some person I don't know then so be it. Plus you never know if someone is going to get into a relationship before the wedding. We gave someone a plus one who has been single for years and now 3 months before our wedding this person is in a relationship.

I gave the single people the option of bringing a Plus One so that they will have someone to talk to or dance with since they won't have full access to me.

You know your guests best. If they know others in attendance then skip the random strangers plus ones. Truthfully no one wants to pay for people who don’t care about you who will never see you again and it is not impolite to not invite them.


All of our single guests know others who are invited as well so we aren’t worried about them being bored, and it allows us to invite more people we are actually close to.

I gave all single guests a plus one, including all members of the bridal party which was only a couple. Not everyone took us up on it. A bridal party member who is more shy is bringing a friend from work and while it may seem strange, I just feel like I'd rather prioritize someone's comfort over giving someone grief over who they are bringing. It isn't a big deal and I am certain they will have no impact on my day.

Agree with Michelle that this mostly about knowing your guests.

I think if the list is small, and the person will know more than one or two people present, it is fine not to extend a plus-one. I also think it's fine not to extend plus-ones for budget reasons.

One of my best friends, who is a social butterfly and who knows absolutely every person on my guest list and will very happily interact with all of them, picks her "plus ones" like rental cars.

This has nothing whatsoever to do with her comfort. She just likes toting a man around like an accessory. (There is no judgment in this statement - it is simply fact.) If she gets into a relationship in the time between invitations going out and the event, I will privately mention to her that they are of course invited as a couple and adjust my list accordingly. I won't be adjusting it so that she can drag some guy she plucked off Tinder around at what is otherwise a very intimate occasion (less than 25 people) of exclusively people with whom we are very close, and I don't think that is bad hosting. She can interact with our 20-something mutual friends for the evening just fine.

Truly intrigued by this thread.

I feel like a lot of people giving advice have no idea what it is to navigate planning a gathering during a pandemic and their words should be noted as such.

I think and hope that many people would understand that COVID has changed everything and they shouldn't fuss or fret about not getting a plus one.