Plated or buffet?

These days I personally don't think that having a buffet means the event is less formal. I see a lot more buffets and a lot less plated dinners both attending weddings as a guest and as a vendor.

If it's actually black tie then you must have a multi-course plated meal and top-shelf open bar among other things (search black tie in the forums for the full list). I generally think buffet is fine but if it's black tie you must raise the standard of service to go with the expectation of formality from your guests.

If FH really wants to do buffet, though, I would let him have this win. There are so many ways were you can make a buffet style meal super classy!

As a guest, I wouldn't think it's weird at all if it was black tie and a buffet dinner as long as everything went smoothly!

You can have an exquisite formal reception, but to call it black tie, you're expecting your male guests to wear tuxes or black suits, women to wear evening gowns, and the expectation is even more over the top than any formal luxury wedding you've ever attended. Black tie mandates a multi-course plated meal, valet parking, top shelf liquor, passed appetizers, top notch live entertainment, etc.. I don't see anything wrong with a buffet (although I prefer plated for the formality of a wedding), I just know that black tie and buffets don't go together. Maybe consider changing your website to say formal attire.

I personally love buffet. I have control over what I eat.

But black tie night, that's plated.

I would let him have this one if he is making a fuss about it. Most grooms could give two bleeps about planning, so if he actually has an opinion I would let him have this one. The only people that would complain about a buffet are snooty people, and who cares what they think! As long as the food is delicious, that's all that matters.

Hi Jocelyn!! I can definitely understand how tough it can be choosing between buffet or plated. There are pros and cons to both sometimes! Since posting, have you decided on which option you'll go with?