Personal Attendants

Um I'm from Texas and it is absolutely NOT customary to have this or a "house party"

Honestly the only times I've ever heard of this is on WW. The very idea makes me 'clutch my pearls' at the absolute gall of asking someone to attend you without giving them the actual honor of standing up with you or... Paying them. Also, you should 'let' a grown adult who isn't actually in your bridal party wear whatever she wants. Good grief.

Alright then, just to clear up a couple of things. My officiant and DJ are doubling as people who will help all the other vendors and all that jazz. My Personal attendants will be in every picture that i take with my bridal party. they won be expected to do anything different from my bridal party, and they wont be "coordinating" anything. They are my high school best friends and i wanted them to be a part of the big day, however high school was a long time ago and I have had more wonderful ladies come in my life whom i am closer with and who I speak to on a daily basis (my bridesmaids). I have 2 personal attendants they both know each other and they both have told me they are more than excited to be in the wedding and want me to ask for help.

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??? still weird. Why not ask them to be bridesmaids? No matter how you present it, it still sends the message "you're not a good enough friend to be a bridesmaid, but you are good enough to do chores for me for free on my wedding day". Why have personal attendants if they're not doing anything different from the bridesmaids? I'm so confused...

I have never heard of this but it sounds horrible.

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Thank you Angie!

Wow, I am really tired of reading all the negativity associated with personal attendants. There is absolutely NOTHING wrong with asking someone to be a personal attendant and it IS an honor as long as you treat them like it is! Yes, if you treat them like a slave that is wrong. If you want someone to run around while you scream orders at them then no, you should not ask a friend or family member for that. I will be asking one of my family’s close friends who has been like an aunt to me and my siblings since I was little. My sister asked her to be her personal attendant when she got married 4 years ago, and it was a lovely experience for everyone. My sister didn’t yell at her or ask her to run a million errands or do anything outrageous. She was there as a personal attendant to share in the specialness of the day and she wanted to help my sister with little things she might need. For example, my niece and brother-in-law’s niece were flower girls but they were too young to walk, so they had them in a wagon to be pulled down the aisle by one of their older brothers. So the personal attendant did an amazing job writing calligraphy on the wagon and made it look beautiful. She helped my sister get into her dress and it was a special moment for them because like I said, she has been there for us since we were little. There is ABSOLUTELY NOTHING wrong with a personal attendant as long as you do it the right way and make it special instead of making them your slave!!!! The point is you can’t blanket this and say that being asked to be a personal attendant is always an insult and is terrible just because some people made their poor friend feel that way in their wedding. Not everyone is like that.

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Mikaela... THANK YOU!!!

View Quoted Comment No problem! I just don’t want all of these people’s negativity to discourage other people from asking someone to be a personal attendant. I just asked mine today and she was very honored to do it and even cried. And I don’t know if you’ve had your wedding yet but to answer your original question, I’m just letting her wear whatever she wants the day of.