I am really struggling with what to do about parent dances and have been dodging the question up until this point. We are 25 days out and vendors are requiring their forms be filled out and sent back so I need to make a decision - and quickly!
My mom married her husband when I was 8 and we have never gotten along. (My biological dad is out of the picture.) I have never been a fan, he has caused me a lot of trauma and hurt & now that I am an adult and have expressed that I don't have to maintain a relationship if I don't want to, he all of a sudden wants to go above and beyond to "fix" it. I'm not interested. He has things he needs to work on before he has a healthy relationship with anyone, including my mom. On top of that, I have social anxiety and I can barely tolerate the thought of everyone staring at us during the ceremony and first dance - I dread the idea of doing it again with an individual I don't care for. However, I don't want to take away my husband's parent dance because I know that is important to them but I also don't want it to be glaringly obvious that I didn't have a parent dance. I'm also having a hard time with how I would tell my mom and her husband that I don't want a parent dance because I know they still expect it. I feel like its a lose lose for me. Either I tell them and deal with their upset feelings (i'm already beyond stressed) on top of trying to help my husband have his dance, or I grit my teeth through a dance I don't want. Advice?? Suggestions?? TIA
