Open Bars and Alcoholics

Similar situation. We will be hosting beer and wine, and I have made it very clear that I expect my bartenders to do their job and cut people off as necessary. Adults are adults, don't punish the rest if your guests for someone else's behavior.

Talk to your bartender about cutting people off. Don't do a cash bar!

Coming from a recovering alcoholic like myself, I must agree with everyone that a cash bar will never stop an alcoholic from getting wasted and making an ass out of themselves and upsetting a lot of people. Hell, even a cash bar for an alcoholic who has zero money will not stop them. They will always find a way. Sad but true.

Truth, I have not read all of the comments so likely it has already been said; but we are having a 7-hour, no interruption, open premium bar, and we also have alcoholics in the family. Maybe I'm asking for trouble, but they are grown adults. My FW was concerned at first but there is just no way around it. I am not comfortable with any option other than an open bar. The heavy drinkers are going to have to manage to control/behave themselves.

We will have a small handful of recovered alcoholics and current alcoholics at our wedding and the thought never even crossed our minds to limit the bar. The more this excuse is brought up the more I think how controlling some people are.

If you have any overweight guests are you going to try to limit their food?

No.

If you do cash bar after a certain point, people are just going to order 10 drinks right before it closes.

You cannot deter an alcoholic from getting alcohol if they REALLY want to. Some will even bring it in with them.

Honestly, a cash bar will not stop an alcoholic. My FH's dad is an alcoholic, and we're having an open bar. Bartenders are there to do their job, and honestly, if he gets sloppy, it looks bad on him, not me.

Jenny with the realness.

Go with an open bar. Bartenders usually know when someone should be cut off... If you're that worried, see about a wine and beer bar and then 2 signature drinks... 1 by you and 1 by your FH.

A professional and decent bartender will be able to handle this. Don't limit it. The bartender will be able to limit if it is needed. That's his/her job. I would have a conversation with him/her previously to make them aware of any expectations you have and include any issues they may come across that you expect to be handled discreetly and appropriately.

Hire bartenders. Have an open bar. Don't police people. The end. Cash bars do not deter anyone.

Maybe do it only for toasting

My dad is a addict.

My family has several people in recovery in it. (what you guys didn't play 'don't wake grandpa' the game that you and your cousins army crawl to the chair he is sleeping in and try to replace his glass of whisky with gin without him waking???)

My wedding will have a full, open, bar.

The bartender is legally responsible to keep an eye on things.

My cousins have shut down bars at weddings before - in their younger days (I am in the middle of the group, so hopefully they are getting more tame with age).

Don't be Rude.

My dad is a addict.

My family has several people in recovery in it. (what you guys didn't play 'don't wake grandpa' the game that you and your cousins army crawl to the chair he is sleeping in and try to replace his glass of whisky with gin without him waking???)

My wedding will have a full, open, bar.

The bartender is legally responsible to keep an eye on things.

My cousins have shut down bars at weddings before - in their younger days (I am in the middle of the group, so hopefully they are getting more tame with age).

Don't be Rude.

Bartenders are trained to know when people have had too much. Let them make that call so that the rest of your wedding can have fun. Adults will do what they want regardless of a cash bar or no bar etc.

Not sure if it's in the comments. But the best advice I've seen on here about the topic is to invite their sponsors. If they are that far along in recovery. My sister has a tendency to drink until she acts like an ass. I had a special talk with her basically saying if you do that I will take a few minutes of my wedding to ask you to leave. We have a shit relationship so I'm very serious about it. As far as other guests drinking too much, I will let them self regulate each other. Not my problem.

It's the bartenders job to "cut off" the ones who have had to many. Have the open bar and trust them to do their job.

@brandy, no.

It doesn't matter if you have an open bar or a cash bar, an alcoholic will still be having drinks regardless. Your job isn't to worry about them on your wedding day, your job is to have an absolutely amazing time. You can't control what other people are going to do.