Open bar... the norm?!

Neither my fiancee or I drink. The venue we chose just so happened to include a 4 hour open bar with with our meal selection. Otherwise we probably woulnd't have had one. Why shell out the extra money so people can drink on your dime? At least that's my perspective on it. But yes, people do expect one and it is the norm here in Pennsylvania.

View Quoted Comment Any book on party planning/etiquette states some type of alcohol should be free. It doesn't need to be an abundance. It can be just beer and wine.

I’m just saying-I’ve never seen it. I’ve been to many big parties and I’ve only been to one wedding that carded people. People don’t think to bring their id to a wedding. Cash bars are the worst. But never have I ever seen an open bar for a child’s birthday party. I mean I guess it wouldn’t really matter if your guests can exercise self control at a party other than a wedding, but there are some adults (I’m talking mid 50’s) in my circle who absolutely cannot exercise self control around alcohol. But a mock tail bar is cute and non alcoholic drinks for the kids.

I've been to about 15 weddings that I can remember and have been of drinking age and I don't believe any of them were cash bars. All but one have been on the east coast (mostly in the areas between Richmond, VA and Washington, D.C.), and the one outlier was in Las Vegas. All of them were open bar... Now, do I personally expect it? No, but I do appreciate it.

I'm in Minnesota, and my venue is one of the most popular wedding venues in the city... The coordinator told me that they only get one wedding a year that has a completely open bar.

FH and I have also asked around as we have many, many friends that are already married and no one we've asked has had an open bar.

I also live in the midwest and have NEVER been to an open bar wedding. Like you said, a couple of kegs and a cash bar...

Most weddings that I have been to have had a completely open bar, at minimum they have had unlimited beer and wine.

Wisconsin here, town of only 70,000 people, not a suburb of a big city, never been to a wedding with an open bar. Free beer ohhhh yes but that’s it. But people drink a LOT here so it can be a huge expense, even just for beer lol. Also I don’t think I’ve ever been to a wedding reception where there wasn’t at least one person wearing jeans if that gives you an idea of the laid back vibe here.

I'm in Colorado. I've been to weddings with an open bar, ones with open bar for a couple hours and then cash bar, one where they gave each guest 3 drink tickets and then if you wanted more you could pay, and several where they have an open bar for beer and wine but if you want liquor then you buy it. Some venues will also let you set a price limit and it's an open bar until you reach $X and then guests can pay. There are a number of ways to do it, so you just have to decide what works best for you. If you don't have a completely open bar, someone will end up whining, but they will get over it.

We are going to provide beer and wine and a couple containers of premixed drinks, like margarita or something, and when it's gone it's gone. But we are having a fairly casual wedding.

I've only been to one cash bar ever, and it was the kind where it's cash only after they run out of everything that had already been paid for. So I ended up just paying for one drink. I'm in the south - I'd be curious to know where in the south the other poster is that said cash bars are standard. Because where I am, open bars are pretty standard. Occasionally I'll attend a beer/wine only wedding but by and large, open bars are the most common.

I'll be doing beer/wine with a signature drink (which is yet to be determined) because that's what included in my base bartending package (I'll be providing the actual alcohol). Also... I know my friends and family too well to think an open bar will be a great idea. Though FH may have a different opinion on this, so we may end up adding a small choice of liquor drinks - like just vodka and whiskey and a variety of mixers - but I'm going to try and stick with beer/wine/one special cocktail.

I'm in the Midwest as well. St Louis, Missouri. We had a full open bar at our wedding. I personally only been to 1 wedding that didn't have a full open bar. They actually had beer and wine. Yes, in our area it is definitely expected.

I'm from Wisconsin and although we Wisconsinites love our booze, I wouldn't say it is expected. I'm always pleasantly surprised when a wedding does have an open bar but I personally never expect it to be. The last few weddings I've been to began as complimentary wine & beer until a certain time, then it turned into cash bar.

For our wedding, we chose to have an open bar because 1) Our venue offered it within the entrée package options 2) A lot of our guests are flying in from across the country and 3) We are opting out of favors/welcome bags. It's really up to you though personally...alcohol is expensive!

All the weddings I've been to are open bar. To cut down costs, I had beer and wine only with a signature drink during cocktail hour. Once the drink ran out, that was it for liquor. The bar was only open during the reception (4 hours).

Im from New York and open bar is the norm. Most if not all venues here provide open bar. We've only been to 1 wedding where it wasn't and were a little surprised. We had open bar at ours

I live in the Washington, DC area.

We are having unlimited wine and beer. Why?

We are both non-drinkers BUT feel that we can give "a little" to our friends who do drink.

New Jersey- every single wedding I have been to has had open bar.

We're considering open bar for beer & wine only, then hard liquor for cash. Our final guest count will be ~60, but FH and I aren't big drinkers, so we would wanted the bar to be things that we would drink. We are also concerned about guests getting too drunk/rowdy if it's a completely open bar. Anyone have any experiences with this?

I'm from South Western PA and literally every wedding I have been to has been full cash bar or free beer & cash for everything else. I was also at one dry wedding. I think it depends on where your from. I just have to say I hate how everyone on here gets defensive about cash bars being "tacky". Like seriously, that's the norm for some places, people really don't have the right to attack what some people and areas consider a norm. People around here are cool with a cash bar.

View Quoted Comment Really? Most of my moms side is from SE PA (four within the last five years) and every wedding we've been to has been open bar or modified open bar...

Forcing guests to pay for part of your wedding has always been frowned upon in my family though. We don't try to host beyond our means.

Ughhhh *SW