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Patrice
Devoted August 2012

Officiant gifts........any suggestions?

Patrice, on July 10, 2012 at 8:36 AM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 1 20

The mother of my friend of 25 years is going to offivate the ceremony. She wouldnt charge and said it was a gift to us. She used to be FH and I school secratary and has know both of us for a very long time. Someone suggested donations but I would like to get something just for her. What are you getting/gave your officiant?

20 Comments

Latest activity by Danielle, on April 18, 2019 at 11:10 PM
  • Kirst
    Master August 2012
    Kirst ·
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    I was unaware you had to get them something?!

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  • MrsKAllTheWay
    Super October 2012
    MrsKAllTheWay ·
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    So happy you said that, Kirst. I was thinking the same thing! This is a different situation than mine seeing as Patrice knows her officiant well and is not being charged, but I'm already paying my guy upwards of $500. I'm not planning on giving him any additional gifts.

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  • Patrice
    Devoted August 2012
    Patrice ·
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    From what i understand from google lol, if they are charging you then there is no additional gift. But if they are not charging then a small gift or donation is warranted.

    But yes, she has come to my baby showers, birthdays and vice versa so i def want to get her something just dont know what ;o( i shouldve caught the bath and bodyworks 75% off sale and made her a basket but i just thought og that as i am typing lol

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  • Soon to be mr K
    Expert June 2013
    Soon to be mr K ·
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    If you are paying your officiant or making a donation to their church, then as far as I know you don't need to get another gift for them.

    Patience J.-if she has known you for a long time, then she is more than an officant. She is what my family would call an "Aunt". You can get her something like jewelry to wear for the wedding day, so that every time she wears it she thinks of your day and her part in making it happen. Or a hankie with a message to her (exclusively weddings and other sites have ones you can put personal messages on) so that if she tears up at the wedding, she has something nice to use if the photog takes a picture. Is she religious? Maybe a new bible with an inscription.

    Hope these ideas help.

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  • Patrice
    Devoted August 2012
    Patrice ·
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    Those are really good ideas! Thank you! Im going to look into the hankie. I have extra jewelry sets so maybe ill give her that and a hankie.

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  • heavenlyyoyo
    VIP August 2012
    heavenlyyoyo ·
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    True, it is not necessary to give a gift, but since she is a family friend it's a nice gesture. I am giving my Pastor a $100 donation and a hat of his favorite team.

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  • C
    Savvy July 2012
    Cece ·
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    Our pastor is not asking for a donation,but we are thinking of gving between

    $ 100.00 to $150.00. Everyone could use a little mooola. Smiley smile I love the hankie idea.

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  • Dawn
    Super August 2011
    Dawn ·
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    A Willow Tree Angel with an appropriate title would be nice, too...

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  • Katelin
    Expert January 2013
    Katelin ·
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    Great question! My FH pastor when he was growing up is traveling 8 hours to officiate our wedding. FFIL already offered to cover his travel expenses, but I really want to do something to show our appreciation.

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  • P
    VIP June 2013
    Private User ·
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    We have a family friend as our officiant. He offered to marry us for free as long as we feed him! Haha. However, we will be giving him a card with money as a thank you. However, if I was paying someone to do it, I would not give them a gift, but maybe a card. It is a special thing for someone to do, even if you do pay them.

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  • Kirst
    Master August 2012
    Kirst ·
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    Ok im paying mine so no gift but now for another question...obviously not in your case Patrice but for everyone else, will the officiant go on their merry way after the ceremony?? I didnt even think about inviting them to stay for reception....what are you doing?

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  • P
    VIP June 2013
    Private User ·
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    @ Kirst, I will be having mine stay. I have seen many people invite their officiant, it is certainly a nice gesture. I personally feel like what the officiant does for the bride and groom is very special and important and they should be able to be a part of the celebration as well. It is completely up to you and your FH though! Do what feels right!

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  • dragonfly726
    Master October 2011
    dragonfly726 ·
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    My uncle officiated our wedding and refused to be paid, so we got him a $50 gift certificate to a great restaurant (one we know he and my aunt like, but that they don't go to very often because of the cost). After all, without him there wouldn't BE a wedding Smiley smile

    I think my parents also gave him some cash, that he refused to take. It was kind of humorous, I think it went back and forth between them like 10 times that night. My parents would slip it into his jacket which was hanging on the back of his chair, and then he would sneak it into my mom's bag when she was looking the other way.

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  • Mouche
    Master October 2012
    Mouche ·
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    We are giving our pastor $100 donation and $200 donation to our church neither has been asked for.

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  • M.S.P.D
    Master August 2012
    M.S.P.D ·
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    I'm not getting ours anything. We don't know her and we are paying her. But if it was a volunteer thing or someone I knew then I might.

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  • Patrice
    Devoted August 2012
    Patrice ·
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    Hey, for anyone looking for officiant gifts.. i just ordered an embroided hankercheif that came with a note from The KeepSake for $19.99

    http://www.thekeepsake.com/p-93-gift-for-minister-clergy-wedding-officiant.aspx

    and Mugs that say "Prayer Changes Everything" frm LTD Commodities for $5.95

    http://www.ltdcommodities.com/catalog/all_sku_listing_product_detail.jsp?productId=prod360056&showSoldOut=true&fm=pinSearch&searchPin=979078-3MC2-PRY&_requestid=86825



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  • Bridgit Garrett
    Bridgit Garrett ·
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    Wedding officiant gifts are always appreciated. I love this post, and the ideas are amazing! Here is another one that is ideal when the wedding officiant is also a friend.

    https://www.etsy.com/listing/77177569/wedding-officiant-gift-perfect-for-the


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  • S
    Just Said Yes November 2016
    Samer ·
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    I know this is a very old post, but I stumbled upon it while searching for an officiant gift before I found the below product. I recommend anyone who visit this page to check it up It’s so funny and creative

    https://www.etsy.com/listing/268386218/gift-wedding-officiant-gift-for


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  • #
    Just Said Yes June 2018
    #PCSchumacher2K18 ·
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    Our officiant has become a great friend of ours over the years. He doesn't charge anything so we are giving a donation of $150 to the church and $100 gift card to the pga superstore since he's a hardcore golf fan. We were able to cut corners and save a lot on our wedding so we had the extra funds to give him a generous gift. Golf is an expensive sport so I'm hoping the gift card will be helpful.
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  • D
    Just Said Yes May 2019
    Danielle ·
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    What did you end up doing? My in driving 13 hours round trip and just had back surgery really want to do something for him.
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