Off-site babysitting for an adults only wedding: Good Idea or no?

If you can afford it, I think providing a baby sitter would be a good idea. That way the parents aren't stuck looking for a babysitter.

Personally, I would let your guests figure out their own babysitting options. I'm currently pregnant with my first child and I couldn't imagine leaving my child with a stranger. Your guests might feel differently or they might feel the same way as me. We had a child free wedding except for children in the wedding and we made it very clear that children weren't invited and we gave everyone enough notice so that they could figure out who could watch their children in advance.

I think it be a nice option to have. The parents can decide for themselves but those with maybe some older kids would definitely appreciate it. Once some older cousins are there, maybe they’d feel better about the younger.

Do not ever B list anyone. People do find out and get upset though they never tell you..and it is never polite as a host.


Providing babysitting is always touchy because some parents are not comfortable with random strangers even with credentials watching their kids. For that reason, many have their own babysitters they rely on. Others want to check on their children occasionally. Discuss your plan with a few parents you intend to invite to get their feedback before proceeding.

I would let your guests figure their own babysitting situations. We’re having a no children ceremony/reception- I wouldn’t want to take on the responsibility of finding babysitters for the children

View Quoted Comment There is also a good chance those family members won’t come at all. My sister got married last year and only 1 out of 6 of my mom’s siblings (all living in different states) came, and two cousins with their spouse and kids (a total of 8 people). It’s just hard to know if they will or not since the wedding isn’t until June of 2022

I would leave your guests to figure out the logistics of childcare

I wouldn’t want to utilize an offsite baby sitter that I didn’t organize if I traveled, and I don’t think my kids would either. This is something I think may be better left in the hands of the parents to sort out.


We had an adults only wedding out of state for most. My guests figured out what was best for their individual families. Some traveled without kids. Some traveled with their own childcare. It worked out fine. I think ONE person ended up not attending bc of a childcare issue, everyone else sorted things out. A couple of my cousins actually got their kids together and had some of the older ones watch some of the younger ones (we have a family FB group and someone started a thread about it and they banded together to form a plan that would make them and their kiddos happy)

View Quoted Comment May I ask, wilk you be a stay at home mom or are you Fortunate to have your parent/sibling/grandparent, etc. be available for childcare while you work?

I would just not invite children. People will either decline the invitation or find their own childcare. As a mom I wouldn’t feel comfortable leaving my child with a stranger I haven’t vetted at a location separate from where the wedding was taking place.

View Quoted Comment Exactly. Don't invite children if you don't want any in attendance. The host decides who is invited, not the other way around with guests bringing whoever they choose.

Babysitters would be a great idea and a very courteous thing to do. My fiancé and I are considering doing something very similar, as it would also be a big help for the out of town guests.

View Quoted Comment I saw you asked if I will be a stay at home mom or have family to watch our daughter. Unfortunately, both of our families in other states so the plan is for me to stay at home and if we end up needing extra money then I would do a work from home job or a night shift job.

First off, I want to say I think it's really sweet of you to consider even getting a babysitter for these kids because I know a lot of people, including myself, would not! For cousins though, I'd agree with many others and say let them figure out their own babysitting arrangements. If anything, maybe talk to them and tell them you are planning an adults only wedding but you know that it's a far way for them to travel and ask if they would have any trouble getting a sitter. If they are really struggling, then maybe say something about a babysitter for the wedding time. A lot of parents don't want to leave their kids with someone they don't know or haven't researched and met themselves, so some of your cousins might not like this idea.

View Quoted Comment

I agree! I talked with my MIL and mother and decided that we will have an Adults Only wedding. We'll leave it up to the parents to orchestrate their own child care. I had a family member offer their house (near the venue) as an option for our out of state cousins if they want as the older ones can watch the younger ones.Thank you for your advice.

View Quoted Comment Okay thanks for replying. I have been told by others that my mom didn't raise me bc she put me in daycare. If thats the case then if one is not homeschooling their child from k to 12 grade is doing the same (with consistent logic). I'm in my 30s and still keep in contact with my daycare teacher who I absolutely loved. My mom was in the military. Being a stay at home mom is definitely a privilege not given to everyone. Congrats on your new bundle of joy!

View Quoted Comment Thanks! My husband thankfully makes enough to pretty much cover our bills. If I was working and had to send our daughter to daycare a good portion of my salary would go towards that so it would defeat the purpose of working.

View Quoted Comment I'm not sure what the purpose of this comment was.... Besides the "thanks."
I was not trying to convince you to use daycare. My previous comment aknowledged what a blessing/fortune/privilege it was to be a stay at home parent.

View Quoted Comment I think Veronica was agreeing with you that it is a blessing and she is fortunate because of her husband’s income.
You asked a very personal question and her response was honest and equally personal.

As someone that has planned a wedding and is also now a mama I will say I would never expect someone to provide childcare for a wedding, nor would I use it if it were available. Most parents do not feel comfortable leaving their kids, especially their very small kids, with someone they haven't personally vetted. When I am invited to a wedding (I'm a bridesmaid in one next winter actually!) I do not take my kids I arrange for a family member to watch them. If they cannot come because of lack of childcare oh well but I'm going to guess that provided childcare would be so under utilized it wouldn't be worth your money. That's my two cents! Also don't feel any sort of bad way about not inviting everyone's kiddos. I can tell you my 2.5 year old would make a mess, scream during your vows, and call your catering YuCkY. I would rather miss a wedding than take little ones to it haha.