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Beginner October 2017

Not inviting family members

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Shaneice, on February 5, 2017 at 9:28 PM

So I have a huge family; aunts, uncles cousins, the whole nine. And my Fiancé and I just can't afford to invite my whole family. His family is very small so it's easy on his end. Plus, I have friends I want to invite that I am almost closer to than some family members. I don't know how to not invite a cousin in fear of hurting their feelings and making thanksgiving awkward. Any advice on how to go about letting family know you can't invite them to your wedding???

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26 Comments

Beginner October 2017
Shaneice · on February 5, 2017 at 10:58 PM
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This is my first time asking for advice etc. on here and I am LOVING the feedback. Much better than Google. Thanks ladies for all the input!
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Rachel DellaPorte · on February 5, 2017 at 11:03 PM
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Shaneice, that's great input. We'd love for you to stay around and keep us up to date with your accomplishments and your struggles. Actually, what we really want to see is you BAM (back and married) photos. Believe me, we're as invested as onlookers can be, and all of us want you to have the wedding of your dreams. Stick around -- we're here to help.
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VIP November 2017
Ann · on February 5, 2017 at 11:16 PM
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Sounds like through previous posts you know your family is drama free & probably won't get their feelings hurt. I say just invite the people you want there & if someone gets their feelings hurt just explain that you had a limit on the guest list. I'm assuming since you all aren't that close they'll understand.
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Beginner October 2017
Shaneice · on February 5, 2017 at 11:57 PM
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Thank you for the reassurance @Lex! I think I'll know what to in the day couple of days now that I've gotten some outsiders opinions. It's good to hear from those who don't know me personally. I can appreciate the honesty!
@thecenterpieceflowers I will keep you updated on my decision be BAM!
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Savvy August 2018
dazsa · on September 21, 2017 at 10:06 AM
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I'm in a similar situation where there are family members i haven't talk to in years & when i told my mom they were invited she said it was, "so crazy that i wouldn't invite family just because i don't get along with them" Help ... I really don't want to invite them but i hate my mom is guilt tripping me about it
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Just Said Yes May 2018
Shannon · on June 1, 2018 at 2:57 PM
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I know this thread is older, but I found it on google because I'm dealing with the aftermath of not inviting certain family members too. My mom suggested something that (in hind site) I should have done: send wedding announcements to everyone (not an invite with specific dates and times) so everyone in the family knows they were thought of. Wording can be something about thinking of them and wishing the budget or venue was bigger to invite them, but looking forward to getting together to celebrate in the future. This could have saved a lot of hurt feelings and explanations after the wedding. Of course, in the midst of all the planning and preparing for the wedding, I didn't want to do that until afterwards....now I realize it would have been better to do it before. Live and learn....then share your wisdom with others so they don't have to make the same mistake.
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