Keisha
Devoted September 2014

Not having liquor or guests purchasing their own

Keisha, on August 26, 2014 at 11:54 AM Posted in Do It Yourself 0 51
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I have been really thinking of not having liquor and if guests want liquor/beer they can purchase their own. I don't or like to drink and we don't have a hotel near where our reception is going to be and I don't want to responsible for anything. What do you guys think? FH thinks its a good idea to make guests purchase their own, and so does FH groomsmen.

51 Comments

  • Emily
    Super August 2014
    Emily ·
    • Flag

    Egads, no! Don't make your guests pay for anything at your wedding. If you want to have a dry wedding, that's fine. But don't suggest to your guests that they should have to pay for anything to attend your wedding. Pay for what you feel comfortable hosting and leave it at that. A wedding is not a family BBQ - it's not a BYOB event.

    • Reply
  • KaylaP
    VIP September 2014
    KaylaP ·
    • Flag

    Dry is perfectly ok. We are having a dry wedding because we don't have a liquor license.

    • Reply
  • rusticbride
    Master May 2014
    rusticbride ·
    • Flag

    Beer and wine... limited selection. This a very heated topic on this board.

    • Reply
  • ~Neschi~
    Super September 2014
    ~Neschi~ ·
    • Flag

    It's common in our area for people to bring their own bottles (liquor) to weddings.

    But we will be providing beer and sodas.

    • Reply
  • Angie
    VIP August 2015
    Angie ·
    • Flag

    I'm not having liquor, nor do I want my guests to bring any. I will have beer, wine, and champagne. I have a cousin that was killed by a drunk driver, so I understand your fear. I am going to have a sign that says be responsible.. and have the taxi number listed!

    • Reply
  • His #1 Lady
    VIP April 2015
    His #1 Lady ·
    • Flag

    There was a post a few weeks ago where a bride on here went to a dry wedding, and she said she would rather have a cash bar than no bar. I can understand how you feel because I don't drink either and neither does most of my family. I didn't want to waste money on that but FH and his family are drinkers. The only reason I kept it in our venue package is because taking it out would only credit us $5 per person. I say a cash bar is better than no bar. My cousin had a cash bar at his wedding and I didn't see a problem. Of course the WW gods on here will bash you for wanting this but who cares it's your wedding. I say do a cash bar if you think a substantial amount of your guests drink, but make sure you let them know ahead of time, maybe through your wedding website, word of mouth, or invite (gasp!)

    • Reply
  • Betty
    VIP September 2014
    Betty ·
    • Flag

    .


    • Reply
  • LadyMonk
    Master September 2014
    LadyMonk ·
    • Flag

    There was a discussion a while ago and people preferred cash bars over dry. You should search this topic, a lot will come up. I am pro-cash bars, but weddings in my area are all cash bars. IE: I have never attended a wedding with a full open bar for the whole reception.

    Personally, I don't drink either, and I don't see why some people "need to" drink to have fun. I feel so bad for those people.

    • Reply
  • Angie
    VIP August 2015
    Angie ·
    • Flag

    I have a feeling that if we had a dry wedding that our guest list would be cut in half! If we run into budget problems and end up cutting the alcohol most of my family wouldn't come! My family thinks they can't be around each other without alcohol! Sad, but true. On the other hand I have a feeling someone in my family would offer to buy the alcohol if we said it was a dry wedding! They just don't exist in our family.

    On another note my dad is a recovering alcoholic. I doubt he will come, but if he does I will probably get him some non-alcoholic beer. I used to drink a lot and sort of quit drinking because I was afraid of turning into an alcoholic. I can have a couple beers and stop now.. used to I would drink until I pass out. I have about 1 drink a year for the past 5 years.

    • Reply
  • Pancakes
    Master October 2015
    Pancakes ·
    • Flag

    So... people walk into your reception with a bottle of vodka for their personal use...? I'm just picturing people walking in with McDonald's bags and cheap vodka bottles in jeans and ripped sleeveless shirts. From reading these threads about the worst weddings you've been to, they were all dry. People leave VERY early. Basically, they finish eating, then leave. I'm not a person who can't have fun without drinking. I barely drink. Maybe once every two months. And I never get drunk. Maybe one drink. I understand this is about you two, but have you thought about your guests at all while planning? Would you like to go to a wedding that is BYO anything? Sorry if I offended... it just sounds like a terrible idea.

    • Reply
  • Emmy
    Master January 2015
    Emmy ·
    • Flag

    There is another thread addressing this that came up yesterday/today and about once a week. Read the comments there. But, if you don't want alcohol have a dry wedding, don't make your guests open their wallets. If they know you don't/don't like to I'd assume that they would know you won't be serving it.

    • Reply
  • Emily
    Master May 2014
    Emily ·
    • Flag

    Provide your guests with beer and wine only. Don't make them pay for drinks. You don't need to have hard liquor at all.

    For more opinions - there is another thread going on now about cash bars with almost 50 comments.

    • Reply
  • OG Ruth
    Master October 2015
    OG Ruth ·
    • Flag

    Weddings in my area are cash bar. I've never been to a wedding that wasn't.

    • Reply
  • Keisha
    Devoted September 2014
    Keisha ·
    • Flag

    We are having our wedding ceremony/reception in just a building, its not a venue so we have to provide everything. We don't have a license either, my family nor FH family don't need to drink to have a good time. Its his friends that are in the wedding party that do.

    • Reply
  • .
    Master October 2013
    .... ·
    • Flag

    Then have a dry wedding. Don't let people bring/buy their own. Guests shouldn't open their wallet at an event you host. Dry is perfectly fine, and if they don't like it, then the guests are rude for not graciously enjoying what you've provided. If they bring their own or pay for their own, some of your guests get different treatment than others (what if some spent all their budget getting to your wedding and can't afford to bring drinks/buy drinks? Then they are treated differently than the guests who can afford their bottle of vodka.)

    • Reply
  • KaylaP
    VIP September 2014
    KaylaP ·
    • Flag

    I wouldn't do BYOB without a license as you are still liable if someone has an accident etc. At least in NE you are!

    • Reply
  • Maggie
    VIP July 2016
    Maggie ·
    • Flag

    My reception will be dry. The Inn that I am having it at asked about a cash bar option and we both said no at the same time. FH's father is a recovering alcoholic, and my brother is also. They don't need to be around it. Plus neither of us drink and all of our family and friends know that we don't drink. The way I view it is if you can't come to my wedding to show your love and support then stay home.

    • Reply
  • Emma
    Master October 2024
    Emma ·
    • Flag

    TWICE in one day??

    Grabbing my popcorn.


    • Reply
  • Celia Milton
    January 2020
    Celia Milton ·
    • Flag

    Ugh.....here we go again. your FH and the groomsmen are not the authorities on this, okay?

    Beer, wine, soda, maybe a sig drink. Don't open the door for your guests to bring liquor. Don't do dry. Assume that your guests will be adults, have a couple of glasses of wine and be happy campers.

    • Reply
  • Jacquelyn
    Super September 2015
    Jacquelyn ·
    • Flag

    I think that providing Beer, Wine, and Pop (Canadian in the house) is more than adequate for a nice social event like a wedding. I have no problem buying myself a couple drinks, but its really nice to know ahead of time so that you have enough money to get yourself home after the event. I'm not an alcoholic, but I like to have a couple glasses of wine. Not having anything to drink would be like the time I showed up to a reception and they didn't serve us dinner!? I'm still confused about that one.

    • Reply

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