Not close with my father. Help!!

That is so tough! I'm sorry you are dealing with this, and as someone who has her own father issues, I empathize.

What are your alternatives to the traditional father roles? That might help us craft an explanation or field off questions.

I was going to walk down the aisle myself, have FH and I give a welcome speech (or forgo it altogether), and skip the parent/child dances for both of us. FH and FMIL understand and they plan on sharing a slow dance at some point during the reception.

We were going to do our first dance after dinner as sort of an "opening the dance floor" kinda thing. That way, it goes from first dance, to everyone dancing, kinda glossing over the parent dances. I'm just still worried that someone will pick up on it and be forward enough to ask.

I would not worry about it. If they ask, just say that it's a personal choice and leave it at that. If they ask other family members they might learn why you made those decisions, but that doesn't change anything.

Weddings now-a-days no longer follow every wedding tradition so your extended family might not think anything of it. No father/daughter dance? that's fine. She's walking herself down the aisle? cool.

Don't worry about the questions or what they will think. Have your wedding your way. The rest is none of their business.

I am also dealing with a similar situation and have decided not to invite my father to avoid the questions and so that I am not uncomfortable. I don't think anyone will miss him. I assume that your father is invited because he and your mother are still together. Maybe take out any parent dance so that attention isn't drawn to the fact that your FH is dancing with his mother but you aren't dancing with your dad. With regard to walking down the aisle, maybe laugh and say that you wanted all the attention on yourself.

My parents and I have a weird relationship due to religious differences. I am closer to my dad than my mom but he still refused to walk me down the aisle. NBD. My best friend was more than happy to walk me and no one asked why. Of course my extended family knows about my parents' religious hang ups so maybe they chalked it up to that. I bet most people won't ask but if they do, I agree with @A&G - just say it was your personal preference.

I think the alternatives you've suggested will work well. I wouldn't worry too much about it.

I agree with the other ladies. You don't have to answer any questions, but if you do, you could say something like "I chose to walk myself down the aisle because I don't like the concept of being 'given away.'"

And as for the dances, just say, "They seemed outdated and we chose not to do them." Any more pressing, and you can just shut them down. Smile and say, "Oh, look, I haven't said hello to dear Mrs. So-and-So yet, would you please excuse me?"

I'm so sorry you're dealing with this, but also love that your vendors are being supportive! It's no one else's business why you want to skip these traditions, but I definitely understand wanting to be prepared with an answer if asked.

I love @Cannols suggestions and also think you can go with answers like "I just wanted to focus on me and my spouse today" or "I hate dancing with everyone staring at me so I wanted to keep it short"

I didn't invite my dad and nobody asked about him. I don't think anyone will expect you to explain why you're not doing those traditions.

Nosy a** relatives. I'm sure there will be some gossip. But you owe no one an explanation. Your immediate family knows what it is.

@greta, I know how you are feeling and what you are dealing with. My step-father and I aren't close either and I am the same way with him. Very little conversation, just keep it to hi and bye. I'm not having him walk me down, my mother and God-mother are walking me down. At the end of the day, it's your wedding and all about what you want. You don't have to answer to anybody who feels they need to why this was done or that was done. Go forth and enjoy your day.

Thank you all for your support and advice. I really appreciate it. This is honestly the most stressful part of my wedding and you all are starting to make me feel like I have it under control.

My dad is not even invited to the wedding. I'm pretty sure FH's family doesn't have a clue about my family. There will probably be questions.

Don't worry about it. If anyone is bold enough to ask, simply tell them that you omitted those things because they weren't important to you.

My dad is invited but won't be more than a guest. My uncle is walking me down the aisle, we are skipping the father daughter dance but FH will dance with FMIl. Unless people are rude they will not ask about it.