Not a bridesmaid but still expected to do the work

No is a complete sentence and i would be telling her that

Don't do it! I would feel offended. Awhile ago, I was in "guest of honor" in my friend's wedding. It took awhile time with my FH and I would never do it again.

I was asked to be moh in my best friends wedding and left out and excluded from all

Things wedding. I offered help left and right while she complained about no one helping her. I was pretty offended. And no I wasn't being overbearing just offered my time when she seemed stressed. We havnt really spoken since her wedding.

The optional hair and make up and group photos thing is a little weird. Like that’s just awkward and basically be a bridesmaid. The DIY thing, I would nope out of so fast. I did literally everything to stay as far away as I could from complicated DIYs. It was rude of her to tell you to throw her a bridal shower and bachelorette but, and this is clearly UO, but I think people should throw showers and bachelorettes for the bride because they love her and care about her, not because a title tells them they should. I know I would throw (or help) one or the other in this situation if we were really that close. She would have never even had the option to ask me to do any of that because I’d already have a plan. Would you change your mind and throw (or help throw) a bridal shower and bachelorette if you were a bridesmaid? I only had one friend as my MOH (my other two BMs were a younger cousin and H’s sister I had never met) and a few of my close friends got together and helped my MOH plan my bachelorette...except one girl who accidentally told my cousin she refused to help because she wasn’t a bridesmaid. Just food for thought, clearly an unpopular response, but I would want close girlfriend to feel loved and special before her big day no matter who her wedding party was. (But the makeup, DIY, and everything is a little extreme). ETA - I’m not excusing the bride from her actions or requesting all these things. I don’t really have blunt, aggressive friends like that (and probably will never). Just saying from a personal standpoint, the things I would *want* to do for one of *my* close friends even if I wasn’t a BM.

I would absolutely be offended and say hell no.

Eeek. Bridezilla alert.

Even if she DID have a bridal party, she cannot dictate what they do. She cannot (or should not) force you to throw a bachelorette or a shower.

Personally, I am only have a MOH. She is organizing a bachelorette that is completely optional for all attendees. For the day of, I have invited my nearest and dearest to get ready together (IF THEY WANT TO) and to have their hair and makeup done (IF THEY WANT TO).

Ugh, this is so gross. even if you have bridesmaids you dont ASK them to do these things. now i am not really of the mind that bridesmaids just have to show up and wear the dress, i as a bridesmaid expect that I will plan a bachelorette and shower but a bride has NEVER asked/told me to do those things, the bridesmaids come together and work on those themselves. she sounds like a bridezilla. just say no.

Omg lol. Please print out this thread and send it to her. This girl is cray

This is so wrong. It's not even okay to ask a bridal party to do those thing let alone non BM's.

I would be offended and she is way out of line. You are not obligated to do any of this stuff. She said having a wedding party would be a hassle. So would all of this for you guys. It would be a big no for me.

Yeah no, she's not a very good friend if she's demanding all of this , even if you were bridesmaids. Just say no. You are absolutely justified in feeling offended. Cannot believe the nerve of your friend.